


Fortuna

by CommanderCeleste



Series: Fortuna [1]
Category: The Old Guard (Comics), The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: A little heads up goes a long way, Alternate Universe, And it was actually kind of fun?, Angsty shit too, Badass sassy lesbians who will tear down the patriarchy one creep at a time, Because I need some practice damn it, Booker is a bit of an ass, Booker's on his way yo, But you won't like him as much here, Enjoy!, Escape from Prison, Exotic locations, F/F, Fowler. Andy's Rottweiler, He's so handsome I can't even, I love him in the film, Joe is head over heels but hurting, Just having fun and building up anticipation, M/M, Maybe I'll take them to space, Mission Impossible meets Uncharted, Misunderstandings, My first cliffhanger, Nico is a cinnamon roll that must be protected at all costs, Nile is finally here you guys!, Not immortal, Oops, Party Crashing, Rating and Warnings have been updated folks, Sex talk in the final chapter, Slooooooooooooow burn, Some smut thrown in there too, Spicy Stuff, There is some blood and violence in this chapter, Things might get a little Uncharted-ish after this, What happened in Málaga?, You might not, also, apparently, as usual, bank heist, but still, fluffy af, i dig it, i dunno, kaysanova, not really - Freeform, probably, robin hood-esque, sort off, superhuman abilities, woof - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-31
Updated: 2021-01-23
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:40:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 18
Words: 57,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25620721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CommanderCeleste/pseuds/CommanderCeleste
Summary: Finally done with this bad boy after... 6 months? I think? Been a ride. A REALLY fun time. Glad I got around to finishing it. Loved how it turned out. Hope you do too!The EndCurrent Chapter Summary:Haven – 8:30 a.m – January 13th, 2020-	Something on your mind? –He huffs, equal parts pleased and grateful to have Nile by his side.-	You know me –-	I do, but I’m no psychic – She leans on the railing, leaving her crutches rest beside her - You want the wisdom? Spill  –He can’t bring himself to deny the aforementioned wisdom. Confidence is kind of a given when it comes to Nile.-	I wouldn’t even know where to start –-	Still halfway through my first cup of coffee, Joe. You know better than to test my patience before I’m on the second one –
Relationships: Andy | Andromache of Scythia & Quynh | Noriko, Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova
Series: Fortuna [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1857154
Kudos: 41





	1. La Vie en Rose

****

##  **La Vie en Rose**

##  ****

_Málaga, Spain – July 19th, 2019 – 10:41 p.m_

His heart had settled down hours ago, but in his mind, he had died and been brought back to life several times over the course of the night. And he longed for it to happen again.

As they lie on the bed, a warm and saline breeze refreshing their skin and the intoxicating aftermath of their encounter lingering in the air, he can’t help but lose himself in every inch of Nico’s skin on sight, and the fantasy coming to life before his very eyes.

Nico’s arm, wrapped protectively around his chest; Nico’s cheek, pressed against his now gently thrumming heart; his own arm, unwilling to let go and pressing Nico’s body impossibly closer.

A symphony humming with heat, comfort and untold emotions, waiting to be spoken into existence when Nico’s eyes open, come the morning sun.

It wasn’t an unpleasant or awkward notion whatsoever, much to his own shock. The disbelief and dread of all this just being a cruel joke, despite still remaining buried deep in his chest, seemed muted. Close to being unceremoniously annhilated, somehow. If he was being totally honest with himself, the reigning emotion withing him was joy.

He’d forgotten what it felt like.

It hadn’t been a drunken mistake, funnily enough. One moment, they were staring deep into each other’s eyes. Jet black, piercing on emerald. What followed was pure ecstasy. A blissful, fleeting eternity that he kept reliving in his mind’s eye. He would be for a while. A long one.

He kept trying to pinpoint how it had come to happen in the first place.

Nicholas’ skilled hand finished stitching up the open wound on his shoulder (one of many, as they found out when he agreed to take off his shirt), an oddly domestic air making the room seem like a haven. It didn’t stop him from sitting in a way that allowed him to keep an eye on both the front door and the window, a loaded 9 mm lying on the table. You can never be too careful in this line of work

They’d agreed to keep a low profile for the time being. Andrea or Quynh would contact either one of them soon enough. Maybe. It’d been a rough night. 

\- You shouldn’t have bothered –

\- As opposed to… leaving an open wound unattended? I always pictured you to be smarter than that –

He can’t help but scoff. Nicholas seems to have forgotten about a little something called accelerated healing, but then again, it usually never takes this long. Turns out a lack of sleep does end up coming and biting you in the ass, eventually.

Funny that.

\- I think you’re mistaking me for Andy –

\- Heh – Nicholas’ amusement places a grin on his lips, the cuts on them and his bruised cheek being gently illuminated by the warm, sunset-like glow of a single lamp. It gives the impromptu doctor an unideal, yet functional, workspace – I gotta say, her right hook is… pretty fucking hard. I feel like I was hit in the face by a semi –

\- It wasn’t meant for you –

\- Still. Remind me not to get in the way again, once she starts throwing punches –

\- If I have to remind you to do that, she probably didn’t hit you hard enough –

\- Harr harr. She’s probably never decked you before –

\- She has –

\- As hard as she hit me? –

\- If I could choose between a semi and her fist, I’d jump in the middle of the highway -

Nicholas' laughter fills the room, with a more subdued version coming out from his own lips, much to both their surprise. His amused, questioning gaze makes him avert his eyes over to the side. They’re too damn bright and enthusiastic and oh, so full of life for him to bear.

He’s not sure why he finds them so fucking captivating. He can’t blame tequila on this one.

The wistfulness trying to burst out from his chest is getting harder and harder to control with each passing second.

When’s the last time he made a genuine joke? With the exception of being around Andy, he’s never this liberal or careless with his humor. He tends to be more restrained. Reserved.

Or rather, an uptight bastard, as Andy so eloquently reminds him. Constantly.

\- I think this is the first time I’ve ever heard you laugh –

Beneath his cheerful demeanor, he swears he can sense a modicum of heartache. Deep underneath, near-flawlessly concealed 

He can certainly relate to that.

-It’s been a while –

\- Still… it’s not terrible –

\- Sweet –

\- Well, you and I rarely get a chance to just… talk. We’re usually banging each other against a wall or… smashing glass with our foreheads –

\- The alternative is letting the other one leave with whatever it is we’re supposed to be stealing - He sighs – But… I’ll admit this is a nice change of pace, all things considered –

\- It’s probably healthier too. For me at least. I’ve seen you spit out bullets –

\- When did I… -

\- I think it was… -

As their memories come flashing back in the corners of their minds, they speak in unison, once again unable to resist the urge to laugh in the process.

\- Malta –

He remembers the frustration so vividly now. Nicholas. A wink. Saluting with his fingers. Rolling his eyes as the engine of their sportscar came alive, further rubbing in just how much of a dumbass he was. Nicholas and Quynh, speeding off into the night with a thunderous roar. Andy chuckling behind his back, turning around, beckoning him to join him for a drink.

\- Feels like an eternity ago –

\- It was –

As their amusement dies down, the air remains casual. Homey. Pleasant, even?

He scoffs. He ain’t even kidding himself. This is pretty fucking great.

It’s so strange and incongruous, but he’s dreading what will happen when either Andy or Quynh give them a heads up. A scratched record, in the most obnoxious and depressing way possible.

His eyes focus on Nicholas'. There's nothing but warmth in his gaze.

There’s no harm in enjoying this while it lasts, right? Nicholas’ posture suddenly seems so much less rigid, his sniper gaze having been replaced by a gentle, perky expression that leads him to believe that he ain’t the only one having a good time. His guard is down. His default stance is wearing his heart up his sleeve, but even so, his defense is never down, much less around him. If Nicholas can let his guard down, doing the same seems appropiate, doesn't it?

Maybe they deserve a break. Even just a couple hours will suffice, for now.

Their bodies finding themselves on such close proximity is usually reserved for their now trademark displays of machismo. It was only a matter of time before they ended up in such an uncharacteristically peaceful position instead.

It’s odd enough to have Nicholas kneeling in front of him. To have himself not wearing a shirt is a fascinating addition to what is already a ridiculously strange scenario. This line of work has a way to keep things interesting that surprises (and amuses) him to no end.

Judging by Nicholas’ endearing, laid-back expression, it’s safe to say he’s as baffled and content as he is.

\- I can’t help but wonder though… - His eyes turn inquisitive. Concerned – Why is it taking so long? I’ve seen you take on so much worse –

He shrugs, unable to provide with an accurate justification. Nicholas' guesses are as good as his own at this point.

Genuine distress starts to crawl up his spine, as he wonders whether this is it. What would he do now, if this gift was suddenly taken away from him so unceremoniously?

He’d gotten used to the idea of feeling indestructible. Larger than life. Safe.

If he didn’t have that anymore… he couldn’t help but feel microscopic. Inconsequential.

Terrified.

He’d forgotten what that felt like too.

\- Hey –

Nico’s hand lingers on his neck, soothing. A pleasant heat starts spreading along his spine, filling his chest with a tingling sensation that keeps the sense of panic in check.

He dies a little inside when he realizes how long it’s been since someone touched him in a way that made him feel at peace. Guarded.

He could get used to the feeling.

Is it wrong to be dying inside for more?

Before he can control his impulses, he leans into the touch, his eyes turning glossy as they avoid Nico’s emerald, gentle and welcoming embrace.

He is… like a sun. A gravitational pull he can’t help but fall victim to. He wants to let go. Maybe he could. Would it be so bad if he did?

The longing purring in his chest goes into overdrive when Nico’s hand lands on his thigh. Curious. Asking for permission. Doubtful. Hopeful. Comforting.

Nico’s smile is as quiet and gentle as the Andalusian twilight, the promise underneath beckoning him to close the gap.

Agonizing inches that feel like miles, keeping them apart.

He’s not sure who leans in first, but he soon comes to realize that he doesn’t actually care.

He just wants him.


	2. Ain't No Rest for the Wicked

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Cancún, México – December 31st, 2019 – 2:47 p.m_
> 
> \- I think it’s safe to assume you’re definitely not from around here –
> 
> The man turns his head, intrigued by the voice’s seductive cadence. Imposing. Shockingly so. 
> 
> She sounds like a handful, making him wonder if she’s worth the effort.
> 
> His doubts fade away instantaneously when his lustful gaze lands on her body, his mind screaming jackpot; his hungry eyes working their way up the woman’s muscled curves and tanned skin.
> 
> \- My eyes are up here, hotshot – 
> 
> _Sassy._
> 
> \- What gave it away? – 
> 
> She huffs, rolling her eyes internally and wishing the earth would swallow her whole. 
> 
> _Next time, you’re the one dolling up and shoving your junk in…whatever it is I’m wearing, Joe._
> 
> \- Aren’t you getting hot in that get-up? Wearing a suit in the beach seems… - _Mind-numbingly stupid_ – … uncomfortable -
> 
> The man’s juvenile grin turns… dangerously confident. Toxically so.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2 is up and away! 
> 
> Hope you're enjoying the build up. I certainly am. 
> 
> Next chapter is kinda loaded with all the _feels_ , so you know, thread with caution. It's going to be bumpy, worthwhile ride!

##  **Ain’t No Rest for the Wicked**

_Cancún, México – December 31st, 2019 – 2:47 p.m_

\- I think it’s safe to assume you’re definitely not from around here –

The man turns his head, intrigued by the voice’s seductive cadence. Imposing. Shockingly so. 

She sounds like a handful, making him wonder if she’s worth the effort.

His doubts fade away instantaneously when his lustful gaze lands on her body, his mind screaming jackpot; his hungry eyes working their way up the woman’s muscled curves and tanned skin.

\- My eyes are up here, hotshot – 

_Sassy._

\- What gave it away? – 

She huffs, rolling her eyes internally and wishing the earth would swallow her whole.

_Next time, you’re the one dolling up and shoving your junk in…whatever it is I’m wearing, Joe._

\- Aren’t you getting hot in that get-up? Wearing a suit in the beach seems… - _Mind-numbingly stupid_ – … uncomfortable - 

The man’s juvenile grin turns… dangerously confident. Toxically so.

Her hand boils up in a fist, the knot in her throat giving her the sudden urge to cough. Or vomit.

_Horny fuck. You should be in a retirement home by now. Or a handful of feet underground._

_\- Easy, boss. We need him alive for this one –_

She takes a deep breath, wanting to smash Joe’s head on the counter as well. 

_Easy for you to say, "boss". And why do they make these so goddamn small? Not leaving an awful lot to the imagination in this…_

\- I’m here for business, for the most part – 

The emphasis on the latter half of the sentence raises her eyebrow. 

_I could always just… break his arm. For business. For the most part._

\- And what does your wife think about you doing business in a pool-side bar? – 

\- Which one? – 

The man laughs, expecting a pat in the back or a free drink, if his obnoxious macho laugh is anything to go by. 

_Ah, the disgusting cologne of mid-life crisis._

She grits her teeth, an embarrassing sound she hopes passes as a giggle coming out of her mouth. 

_\- Oof –_

The inhuman sound she just conjured will haunt her (and Joe) for the remainder of her days on Earth, and beyond. 

_\- What’s this guy’s deal? My money’s on daddy issues –_

_Mine’s on him overcompensating a dick the size of a quarter._

And she was getting worried this would be painless and quick. Her luck is being it’s usual, shitty-ass self, it would seem.

\- All kidding aside though… the Riviera Maya? During the winter? What kind of business you into? –

\- You always this curious? – 

His hand hovers over her leg, not touching, but WAY to close for her to keep her cool if he dares lay a finger on her.

_Just breathe._

_\- We can cut his balls off once you’re done –_

Her smile, for the first time in the conversation, feels genuine.

She grabs his hand as his fingers inch closer to her thigh. She applies just enough pressure to seem playful, secretly wishing she could rip his arm off of its socket and beat him with it. 

\- I’m inquisitive by nature – 

His confusion passes by in the blink of an eye, being quickly replaced by his seemingly trademark smug expression. 

_\- I think we should slip him a dictionary–_

Nicholas can’t help but chuckle, only to chastise himself mentally.

As if that dark-skinned prick needed his arrogance to be encouraged.

He scans the crowd, hoping to get a visual on Quynh, hopefully swimming her way to the pair and making sure it’s them getting the info this time.

He’s still pissed that those two managed to make them look like fucking amateurs back in Málaga. Not to mention… some other, more personal, details.

He sighs. 

Prick can jump off a cliff for all he cares. 

_Where the hell are you Quynh?_

_If you keep on taking your sweet old-time interfering…_

\- Quynh, any day now would be nice – 

\- Patience is a virtue, hon – 

\- Harr harr – 

\- Listen, she got to him first, fair and square. The info is as good as hers – 

\- And…that’s what I’m worried about? Why aren’t you? – 

\- Would you just relax? We knew this was a possibility – 

\- Which, doesn’t make it any less frustrating – 

\- Nico, if I barge in on the conversation now, I’ll just scare the _El Creepo_ off and NO ONE gets the location of the prize – 

\- He really is an asshole. I think we’re all looking forward to ruining his day – 

\- Being an ivory trader was an especially gruesome detail – 

\- Yeah. Did a background check on him a while back. He’s into hunting too – 

\- Unsurprising. I’m kinda shocked she hasn’t punched his lights out yet. God knows I’m going to – 

Before he gets a chance to modulate his tone, the words burst out with a rather condescending tone that he winces at as soon as they leave his mouth.

\- Real professional –

_Where the fuck did that come from?_

\- …wow – 

\- Yeah, yeah – 

\- Dick move –

\- I know, I know. I’m sorry - 

As he makes eye contact with Quynh down below, Yusuf makes yet another amusing comment over his comms with Andy. 

He sighs, yet again. 

He truly drives him up the fucking wall. 

_That gorgeous fucking bastard._

\- What’s up with you? – 

She sounds… pissed.

_Just play dumb._

\- I could ask you the same thing – 

\- Ok, stop. You’ve been on edge for a long fucking time now. It’s not funny anymore –

_Smooth._

\- I’m not… trying to be an asshole –

\- Newsflash, darling: You’re doing a shit job pretending otherwise - 

\- I know. I’ll cut the crap. Can we just… focus on this first? – 

\- No. We can’t. You being all testy and uptight doesn’t help. Like, at all – 

\- It won’t happen again, ok? It’s.. nothing. It can wait –

\- Is it Yusuf? – 

\- Quynh –

\- Is this about Málaga? – 

Her tone isn’t as loaded with anger. She’s genuinely curious, trying to tear down the walls he intentionally put in her way. To protect himself more than anything. 

He’s not sure why he even tried, given that she can see right through his bullshit with a blindfold and ear plugs... 

_A for effort, dumbass._

Despite how conflicted he is about it, he knows it’s pretty damn shitty to take it out on her.

\- It’s not just Málaga – 

\- Then what is it? – 

\- Not now – 

\- You could always, you know, just talk to him? – 

\- And could you please, I beg of you, focus on the mission and get that… – _Godfucking_ -… tracker on him? – 

She groans, deciding to let this slide for the time being. She’ll squeeze the truth out of him soon enough. And maybe kick his smartass attitude off while she’s at it. 

Once they’re done dealing with the pervert though.

\- She’s going to end up tagging him by the looks of it –

\- Which means you’ll have some homework – 

\- I don’t mind, hon. And we gotta give credit where it’s due. She’s way to professional for her own good. I would have shoved that beer bottle up his –

\- Point being – 

\- Listen, if she does indeed end up having to track him (which she will), it’s just a matter of tailing them until we can get a fix on which of his properties he’s headed to. Longer, yes. But definitely more bearable than this – 

\- Lucky us – 

\- Plus, it’ll give you some time to get used to the idea of having to meet Yusuf face to face when we crash the party - 

\- You say it like I’m meant to be looking forward to it – 

\- Parties are fun – 

\- Yeah, when you have an invitation. Or less bounties on your ass. Last time I checked we had... 9? - 

\- Try 15. And, seriously? Would you rather become a lab rat than confront him? Priorities, darling –

\- Why do you keep bringing him up? – 

\- Who? – 

\- Wow – 

\- See? You are kind of obsessed with him –

\- Yeah. How’s Andy, by the way? - 

\- Funny. Just… fine. Be miserable. I don’t give a shit – 

\- Quynh, for all that is holy and sacred… -

\- Relax. Jesus – 

\- You’ll be the death of me – 

\- Might spare me the trouble of watching you drool and trip on your own feet every time he so much as – 

The commotion on the bar snaps them out of their banter.

The THUNK of the man’s head being smashed over the counter is heard faintly through the comms and loudly the handful of feet directly in front of Quynh’s standby position.

It’s glorious.

_Kinda reconsidering all this "not being straight" mindset all of the sudden_

\- Yikes – 

Quynh’s proud laughter brings a smile to his face. He kinda wishes he’d had a front row seat, same way she did. 

\- Oh man, I nearly missed it! –

The man storms away, profanity’s parading on his head. The bartender approaches Andy, apologetically. She waves him off, amiably. 

\- Target’s on the move –

_Finally._

\- And tracker is in place, seemingly – 

\- Got yours ready? – 

\- On it – 

\- Break a leg –

\- Try not to be too much of a creep with Yusuf while I’m working - 

\- _Va’ fa Napoli*_ , Quynh–

_*Go fuck yourself_

\- Lên trên mông của bạn*, darling – 

_*Up your ass_

° ° ° 

\- That was… revolting –

She struggles to keep her grin from growing too wide. 

_Play it cool._

\- It’s all in a day’s work – 

\- Doesn’t make it any less of a pain in the ass – 

\- Granted – 

\- And hey, glass half-full: You definitely broke something –

\- Well, I couldn’t chop of his balls in public – 

\- He didn’t run off far. We technically could go and finish the job – 

\- Tempting, but I’ve had enough of that asshole to last a lifetime - 

Quynh sits opposite of her, back towards the bar, sunglasses now lying on the counter.

_She’s wearing that perfume again?_

\- Want a drink? Or hell, a bath? I wouldn’t hold it against you -

\- I’d rather just sleep this off for a week – 

Her eyes can’t help but linger on Quynh’s, now that they are visible. 

If the twinkle in them, and her trademark (confident, knowing, breathtaking) grin are anything to go by, she’s posing. Intentionally. Just for her. 

_She’s been working out. And tanning. No wonder she’s showing off._

\- You okay, doll? You seem… tired – She turns, leaning in closer. Her head cocks sideways, discreetly, but enough to give away her concern. She’s picked up on her nuance and quirks over the years - More than usual – 

\- I’m fine –

Her gaze turns iron, her eyebrow high up. Unimpressed.

_Autopilot response. I should know better._

\- And I’m as innocent as a nun – 

She huffs, unable to muster a chuckle (much less laughter), despite the situation begging for it.

She really is fed up. With everything. 

Quynh takes off her ear piece and hides it in her top.

\- Girl code. No bullshit – 

She breaks into a smile. Quynh’s smile turns softer. 

She takes off her ear piece. 

\- I don’t even know where to start though – 

\- Well, there’s no rush, doll - She nods at the bartender - And hey, New Year is still hours away – 

Her grin recovers its more… seductive qualities. It’s enticing, for sure. A suggestion she’s plenty willing to follow all the way through. But first, she really needs to vent.

She sighs, stress starting to drop of her shoulders with surprising ease. 

\- Ok – 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Oh, there ain't no rest for the wicked,  
> Money don't grow on trees.
> 
> I've got bills to pay, I've got mouths to feed,  
> There ain't nothing in this world for free. 
> 
> I know I can't slow down,  
> I can't hold back,  
> Though you know, I wish I could.
> 
> Oh, no there ain't no rest for the wicked,  
> Until we close our eyes for good."
> 
> **_Cage the Elephant, 2008._**
> 
> https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5XCYwLPOfycjimrdyTXyuE?si=7UgBCkXQSRuD7ycoQZn18w


	3. Allowed to be Happy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _5:19 p.m._
> 
> Andy’s smile fades off into nothingness. Not fast enough, though.
> 
> \- Evening, boss – 
> 
> \- Hey, you – 
> 
> He stares, amusement growing in his chest when he notices the blush on her cheeks.
> 
> \- You got anything to say to me? – 
> 
> \- I haven’t said anything – 
> 
> \- Well, it looks like it - 
> 
> He keeps on the pressure. Her blush turns red furious. Her nervous smile grows in strength, but she holds his gaze.
> 
> \- I ain’t judging – 
> 
> \- Well stop laughing then! Jesus – 
> 
> \- I mean, you could see it coming from a mile away – 
> 
> \- Funny you of all people would say that – 
> 
> His amusement takes a 180°, as effortlessly (and infuriatingly) as mist.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, the theme's I'm aiming for are, in a nutshell: Allowing yourself to be happy, to be a little selfish/kind to yourself from time to time, indulge in those little things that make your ride worthwile and to just FUCKING TALK THINGS OUT, damn it. 
> 
> Not sure who might need to hear this, but it's fine to take it easy from time to time. To breathe and indulge in those guilty pleasures that bring a smile to your face. To be alone. To dance around your room, with your favorite music playing in the background. To pretend to be a professional singer in the shower, despite... being kind of terrible at it? 
> 
> It's rough out there, but that doesn't mean we don't deserve to feel joy, or to have nice things happen to us, just for the hell of it. Just... fuck it.

## Allowed to be Happy

_5:19 p.m._

Andy’s smile fades off into nothingness. Not fast enough, though.

\- Evening, boss – 

\- Hey, you – 

He stares, amusement growing in his chest when he notices the blush on her cheeks.

\- You got anything to say to me? – 

\- I haven’t said anything – 

\- Well, it looks like it - 

He keeps on the pressure. Her blush turns red furious. Her nervous smile grows in strength, but she holds his gaze.

\- I ain’t judging – 

\- Well stop laughing then! Jesus –

\- I mean, you could see it coming from a mile away – 

\- Funny you of all people would say that – 

His amusement takes a 180°, as effortlessly (and infuriatingly) as mist. 

\- Andy – 

\- What? Suddenly you don’t like teasing as much? – 

\- It’s different – 

\- It doesn’t have to be – 

She’s not messing with him. Her eyes are kind. Her demeanor is making him all kinds of unsure. 

\- Just fucking talk to him, Joe. Honestly, this is getting… – 

\- It’s not that simple and you know it –

\- … ridiculous and you keep on trying to talk your way around it… -

\- We are not having this conversation… – 

\- And I’m so fucking tired of it – 

The room grows quiet as she raises her voice above his, somehow. 

\- Aren’t you? – 

He remains quiet, unable to indeed, talk his way out of this. 

\- You think it’s easy for me to see you like this? It’s been months, Joe – 

_6, to be precise._

\- You’re blowing this out of proportion – 

\- And you’re behaving like a child – 

\- That is totally uncalled for – 

\- Oh, fuck that – 

He takes a deep breath, hating how much her words feel like an iceberg-cold splash of reality. 

_Fucking A._

\- You don’t get to be all testy, and uptight and so fucking mad, and tell me that _I’m_ the one blowing this out of proportion – 

He keeps his head down, finding himself at a loss for words. Frustrated. Ashamed. The gang’s all here.

\- You deserve a break every bit as much as I do. Only difference is I’m done pretending like there’s nothing to do but feel sorry for myself – 

He finally raises his eyes. 

This isn’t just about him. 

She kneels down, struggling to keep eye contact, much less her composure.

\- You need to cut the crap and face him –

\- What if he doesn’t care? – 

\- And what if he does? –

\- He ran off, Andy – 

She grows quiet. He can almost hear her roll her eyes, mentally. 

They’ve had this discussion almost half a dozen times now. 

Why is she being so insistent about this? Why does she want him to talk to Nicholas so bad? 

That she and Quynh are a thing doesn’t mean that it’s equally simple for everyone else. Not everyone is as lucky as they are. 

For Nicholas, it was a quick fuck. And then he ran off. He needed some time to think, but Jesus fuck, did he have to sneak off when his back was turned? He didn’t even leave a goddamn note. 

He was so embarrassed. He felt naked, in a rather unpleasant way. All his emotions laid bare, only to be stepped on as if they meant nothing. And that was just the tip of the iceberg.

And then he has the audacity to act all… smug and flirtatious and to be such a prick about it? 

\- So did you, Joe – 

\- And I came back – 

\- I know – 

They sigh in unison. Each for their own respective reasons. The feeling behind it being quite similar. 

Longing. Exhaustion. A fire in their chest, searching for that something to help it stay aflame. One of the two certain of what that something was, the other unwilling to let it in.

\- I can’t bear the thought of… talking to him about this, if he’s going to be all smug and just… acting like he doesn’t even give a - 

\- Just – 

He stays silent, transfixed. 

The knot in his throat keeps him from speaking up.

\- Once. Just… try it once, Joe – 

He did. Can’t she see?

He was… honest. He meant every word. Every caress. Every time their lips collided against one another. Every time he held his arousal in his hand. Every second he lost himself in his gaze and caressed every inch of his body with his hands. He couldn’t bear to tell him how beautiful he was. Not out loud. How much he dazzled him the same way the Sun itself does. His touch was gentle. Reverent. Over and over and over again, hoping his actions would speak louder than his words. 

When he came back, the room was empty. The bed was still undone. His scent, lingering in the pillows. The maid, frustrated at his intrusion, making the bed and a curious look on her face. 

He took his shit and he left. They both did, clearly.

\- Would you? – 

Her smile is gentle. Encouraging. Certain.

\- For you, I would – 

He can’t help but scoff, internally struggling to keep that stupid hope buried down where it belongs. 

\- That was a cheap shot – 

She places her hand on his cheek, her motherly instincts coming alive and easing the weight off his shoulders.

Could this actually work out? 

Maybe… they could at least remain friends. Acquaintances. A professional courtesy, of sorts. More than that, he can’t bring himself to imagine or hope for it. Not with Andy in front of him anyway 

It’d be nice for them to somehow put that night behind them, and be able to be in the same room without it feeling like torture. A different kind. Prior to their encounter, all the tension kept on building to that pleasurable climax. That one night he couldn’t help but relive time and time again like a prayer. Deep down, he’s a masochist, it would seem.

Now the tension felt aimed and leading up into an entirely different direction. Polar opposite. 

If anything, he’ll be able to sleep like a normal person again, once this is done and over with. 

Hopefully. 

\- I’ll try – 

Her fingers rub against his cheek, conveying the courage he sorely lacks.

He leans into the touch, somehow managing to keep the tears at bay. 

\- You’ve got this, you – 

\- For you, I’ll do my best – 

\- That’s the spirit -

\- Let’s get to it then – 

His pity party is officially over. Andy looks at him, equal parts pleased and proud.

\- We’ve got a party to crash - 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seriously though. Fuck it.
> 
> Official Soundtrack: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5XCYwLPOfycjimrdyTXyuE?si=ZfroER0-QvaXBKwVloLggQ


	4. A Normal Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Cancún-Tulum Highway - 9:43 p.m._
> 
> \- You’ve got an ETA? – 
> 
> \- Patience is a virtue, hon – 
> 
> \- We’re still hours away, aren’t we? – 
> 
> \- Relax – 
> 
> He takes a deep breath, focusing on the road.
> 
> The music is nice, a least. People here drive somewhat carelessly, but they’re mostly nice. Friendly. Enthusiastic. He feels right at home for the most part.
> 
> He kinda wishes he could stay a little while longer.
> 
> \- How you holding up? – 
> 
> \- I’m… fine? – 
> 
> \- I mean eh, about… - 
> 
> \- Oh – 
> 
> He braces for impact, expecting her to coerce him to spit it out, but she remains silent. 
> 
> She can feel her looking at him through the corner of his eye. 
> 
> \- I’m not even sure how I feel about him anymore –

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, these dumbasses. They will be the death of me. I'm loving all this pining and misunderstanding stuff, but I'm looking forward to getting them back together and having them confront each other.
> 
> I got some ideas regarding where to take the story, but this is uh, looking a little longer than expected. I was thinking 10-ish chapters? But at the rate I'm going this is going to be longer. Good, but longer. So, brace yourselves. 
> 
> I'll flesh out the Málaga situation along the way, but for all intents and purposes... we've got more than enough set-up. Next up is ACTION, baby. All kinds of it. 
> 
> ENJOY!

##  A Normal Life 

_Cancún-Tulum Highway - 9:43 p.m._

\- You’ve got an ETA? – 

\- Patience is a virtue, hon – 

\- We’re still hours away, aren’t we? – 

\- Relax – 

He takes a deep breath, focusing on the road.

The music is nice, a least. People here drive somewhat carelessly, but they’re mostly nice. Friendly. Enthusiastic. He feels right at home for the most part.

He kinda wishes he could stay a little while longer.

\- How you holding up? – 

\- I’m… fine? – 

\- I mean eh, about… - 

\- Oh – 

He braces for impact, expecting her to coerce him to spit it out, but she remains silent. 

She can feel her looking at him through the corner of his eye. 

\- I’m not even sure how I feel about him anymore – 

She looks at him, her hand landing on his thigh, pressing gently and hoping it’s enough to comfort him. 

It’s working, as usual. 

\- Back in Málaga… - 

He breathes. Deeply. Remembering it gets his heart racing. 

\- It was more than just a one-night stand for me – 

The tension between the two could be cut with a knife up until that point. It was ridiculous how they couldn’t keep their hands off the other. The sparring was… suspiciously cathartic. The heat between his legs, every time he wound up pressed against a wall or down on the floor, Yusuf’s body so agonizingly close to his own. The dead-serious smirk. The gasped breaths. Sideways glances. The fire in his eyes. It was torture. And it was bound to blow up in their faces, eventually.

When Joe… Yusuf closed the gap between the two and held him in his hands… when his lips made contact with his own… the world imploded. His heart burst like a firework. The heat was as torturous as a cataclysm. It was messy. Ravaging. Yusuf’s hands, exploring every nook and cranny of his body, his own lips attempting to repay the favor. 

He kept telling himself that the tears weren’t just his. That the overwhelming emotion bursting out from him was reciprocated. Welcome, even. It felt like it at the time. 

He kept expecting Joe to pull away. To push him away. Maybe they should have been more conservative about it. Taken things slower. He kept fearing that Joe would close himself and call it quits. To build up the walls they’d worked so hard to tear down. 

Instead, he gasped. This is what they both wanted. Time and time again. He shared their breath, their foreheads leaning on each other. He intertwined their hands. Went in deeper. His tongue was gentle and curious. His fingers deft and confident. His eyes…

They still haunt him to this day.

He’s made it his mission to never let him in again, despite every cell and bone in his body aching for him to change his mind. Holding his gaze is a sweet punishment he can’t help but subject himself to every time they cross paths and late at night, when he longs for his body to be once again entangled with his own. 

But how could he possibly even consider it? Shouldn’t he be stronger than that? Stand his ground? Have some dignity?

His eyes opened; the pleasure, still fresh between his legs. The oh, so delightful soreness was enticing him to stretch his ass out of bed, and go looking for Joe. Share a cup of coffee. Tease him for abandoning the bed, leaving only his intoxicating scent and heavenly warmth between the sheets. 

The breeze was blowing gently. The Mediterranean heat building up, the sunrise now on its peak and it’s light, curiously peeking its way into the room, one inch at a time.

He’d hadn’t slept so well in months.

\- I thought he was waiting in the balcony. Or maybe down by the beach – 

He wasn’t in either.

\- And I… I couldn’t handle it – 

He waited. The maid came by at around 9:45. 

He already had his pants on. The doorbell rang again, the hoarse voice losing its patience. 

He put on the shirt and walked out, mustering a smile and an enthusiastic greeting. The maid smiled. At least someone was nice to her that day. 

He didn’t realize it was Yusuf’s shirt until he reached his room.

\- I kept hoping I would see him walking up from the beach. Maybe he’d gone for a run or… - He coughs, close to being unable to muster the will to keep talking – I got tired of making excuses – 

The file was gone too. It’d been on the table next to the 9 mm when they’d…

He should’ve felt furious. He didn’t really care about it, he came to realize later on. It’s all in a day’s work. Part of the job description. Tiny letters you can’t bring yourself to care about until they come and bite you in the ass later on. He kept it bottled in until he was alone.

As the scalding water poured down his back, a choked gasp escaped from his lips. The tears came shortly after. He kept his hand over his mouth, his other hand tugging his chest, struggling to keep himself on his feet. 

\- When we crossed paths again, he was… cold. There was… so much conflict in his eyes. He seemed angry. And frustrated, and tense. He felt like an entirely different person – 

He’d humor himself and swear he’d seen sadness in his eyes as well. His words said the opposite. His gaze was like concrete. The air in the room felt suffocating. 

So, he tried to soften it. Humor wasn’t what Yusuf was expecting, apparently. 

Well what the fuck did he want? 

A quickie? An apology? 

Bullshit. 

\- I’m not even sure how I could talk to him about this without falling apart there and then, Quynh –

_Oh, Nico. I’m sorry, darling._

\- No wonder you were pissed off – 

\- Yeah – 

Cars speed by the gas station when they settle down for a break, and run through the plan one last time. ETA is 45 minutes. 

He’s dreading what will happen when he crosses paths with Joe again. 

It’s been about 6 months since Málaga. About 3 and a half since Buenos Aires. Last time they met face to face was about 3 weeks ago, back in Mykonos. 

Things have gotten better, arguably. The air remains tense, but needless to say it’s different. The conflict is clear in Yusuf’s eyes. His bluntness has been softened. There’s an air of indifference, complimentary to his cold demeanor. He’s still trying to decipher it. To cope with how many miles have grown between them in such a relatively short time. Back at ground zero, unsure whether trying to tear down the walls again is worth it. Praying and dreading Joe will speak his mind and get it over with. 

Cards on the table. Heart up his sleeve. 

What would happen if what he said was too painful to bear? He keeps on telling himself that Joe isn’t the prick he sometimes pictures him as, when his heartache sweeps him off his feet and snaps his more sensible judgement… but he can’t help but wonder.

His humor has remained as constant as usual. He’s always been a talker on the job. He can’t help it. It’s worse when Yusuf's around, somehow. He gets nervous when that steely, jet black gaze meets his emerald uncertainty. The memories inevitably come flooding back, taking him off balance. Yusuf’s made sure to point it out. He can’t help but snap back at him with sarcasm that borders on cruel. Uncharacteristic for his otherwise kind-hearted attitude by default. 

The dagger’s in Yusuf’s eyes become loaded with anger. He stands his ground, sarcasm and teasing remarks that seemingly frustrate Yusuf to no end. It’s like a vicious, never-ending cycle he keeps on falling for. He feels helpless. Unable to think of something else to do. 

\- Hey – 

His eyes focus on hers. She’s not good with feelings, but something’s different as of recently. She seems less like a hurricane, and more like a soothing drizzle, if it makes sense. 

She seemed adrift, in her very, well, Quynh way. Chaotic. Uncertain. Cautious. Scared, perhaps? Hermetically sealed. Unhappy, deep down. 

Andy’s been a good influence over her. He always had a soft spot for her. She’s always been a good sport. She doesn’t take shit from anybody, but there’s something about her that leads him to believe that deep down she’s all fluff. Her right hook may be killer, but her heart is the size of a mountain, based on his experience. 

The smile she’s caught on Quynh’s lips when she’s around is… endearing. Juvenile. It’s like she’s on her early twenties all over again. She seems… younger. Whole. Smitten. Carelessly so. With an enviable sense of abandon and passion he finds captivating. It’s like the world stops spinning when he so much as mentions her. Like she’s finally made it home. 

It fills and tears his heart to pieces at the same time.

\- It’ll be alright – 

\- Easy for you to say. You are all set –

\- I think… I’ve paid my dues. We’ve been so focused on doing some good, you know? On setting an example. And I guess it ain’t so bad. For a while –

He listens intently. He’s helpless to do otherwise. She radiates and.. she seems so relaxed, somehow. She could take on the whole world, same way she always has. Come out on the other side, ready to do it all over again even more fabulously than last time. 

Doesn’t mean she’s going to keep on doing it though.

\- It’s hard to match the thrill of it. And again, you get used to living like this. Never sticking around for too long. Enjoying the ride in the blink of an eye, watching as it passes you by – 

And in that moment, he becomes aware of the tiredness in her eyes. It finally has a clear driving force behind it, at least.

He’s gotten used to downplaying it in his end. To tell himself it’s worth it. That it means something. 

And it does. But it takes a toll, and doesn’t pull its punches whatsoever. That’s the unglamorous part you never get to hear about. 

\- I think the idea of being selfish for a while is… pretty damn appealing –

The breeze remains warm, the soft thrum of cars passing by, mixed with the distant sound of crashing waves and the jungle coming to life. He rubs his arms regardless.

\- I don’t think I’m quite there yet –

Being by himself is a notion that’s crossed his mind before. He wasn’t entirely put off by it, but he felt somewhat conflicted about it. 

Part of him was curious what he could accomplish on his own. The places he’d see. The life that awaited over that blue, never-ending expanse that stretches as far as his eyes can see.

\- That’s valid, darling. But I am – 

The other wants to hold on tight to that sense of normalcy that being with Quynh provided. 

\- I know – 

\- Will you be alright? – 

He ponders on it, his gaze losing itself in the darkened sky. A great battle takes place up above, with roaring thunder clashing in the distance and clouds leisurely crossing by at an impressive speed. 

A storm of violet. Clash of rose. A dance of lavender, with the moon taking over the sun’s place at the helm.

It’s got its ups and downs, but hey, the view often takes his breath away. 

It’s… it’s not so bad, all things considered. 

\- It’ll take some time to get used to it… but I’ll manage – 

\- I’ve taught you well – 

\- I’m assuming she… -

\- She’s the one who sold me on the idea – 

\- I’m glad she did –

They grow quiet. Looks do convey more than words, clearly.

She pulls her into his arms anyway. She doesn’t resist. 

She never does, but it usually doesn’t have such a heavy feel to it. 

A breath they’d been meaning to get off their chest. A sigh in unison. Two beating hearts on a near-silent agreement. 

He’s surprised the waterworks haven’t started yet. They should be having a field day, given the circumstances.

\- When’d you get so wise? - 

\- I’ve always been, darling. Only difference is now you’re taking my advice more seriously. Hopefully – 

She sounds content. 

Sorting stuff out. Striving for something greater. Letting someone else play superhero for a change. And making sure he gets his head in the game and stops being such a wuss, so he can do the same in due time.

\- I’m going to miss you, man - 

\- I sure hope so. I’ve put up with your shit for a long fucking while – 

He’ll be alright. He’ll get around to finding that closure thing people keep blabbering about. 

He’ll set the record straight on his end. He hopes Joe… Joe is willing to do the same. Or to at least try. 

Who knows, maybe things will work out. Unlikely, but it’s nice to humor himself about it.

\- Finding a new partner is going to be pain in the ass – 

\- I’m not so sure about that –

Her smile is mischievous.

She knows something. And chances are so does Andy. 

Or is his glass half-full attitude getting the better of him again?

Andy once told him he was too good to be in this line of work. She wasn’t condescending, or mocking. She seemed… glad? Surprised. 

Her composure was regained shortly after. 

\- You keep an eye on her – 

\- I thought that was your job –

She gives him the finger, only to gift him with a knowing grin on the side.

\- Joe sends his love, by the way – 

She waves her off the same way she did, a chuckle escaping from his lips.

He looks at Quynh, the load suddenly feeling much less oppressing on his back. 

\- I guess we’ll find out – 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Hope you guys/gals/NB pals are having just as much fun with this ride as I am!
> 
> Official Soundtrack:  
> https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5XCYwLPOfycjimrdyTXyuE?si=7UgBCkXQSRuD7ycoQZn18w


	5. Ostentatious is the Word of the Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Punta Allen, Sol Caribe State - 11:05 p.m._
> 
> \- You have _got_ to be kidding me with this place – 
> 
> \- Yeah. This guy has some serious self-esteem issues – 
> 
> They make their way further in. They push past the multitude, deep in its sense of anticipation and _way_ too thrilled for their liking. They survive the trek past the atrium and make their way inside the main event, where the music and crowd are at its peak. 
> 
> They shake off the confetti resting on their shoulders and hair, relieved to have survived this far. They are greeted by a rather obnoxious display of consumerism and entitlement as a reward. 
> 
> \- I’m guessing his word of the day is “ostentatious” – 
> 
> \- Not the word I’d use – 
> 
> As they head for the bar (the more secluded one on the right side), Andy’s headset pings.
> 
> \- Ok, got a lock on a signal – 
> 
> \- That was easy – 
> 
> \- _Too_ easy –

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Given that I'm working on my thesis (and quite honestly, feeling somewhat burned out), I'm going to be updating this fic on Wednesday's from here on out. Thanks in advance for your patience, guys/gals/NB pals. I deeply appreciate you sticking around for this bad boy. 
> 
> It's comforting to know that some folks out there may be having a good time with this. It's been a rough couple days, but I get a very strong sense of catharsis in posting this, as well as reading all the PHENOMENAL fics around here. I sincerely hope you're holding up ok. 
> 
> Stay safe, take care of yourselves and have an awesome week!

## Ostentatious is the Word of the Day

_Punta Allen, Sol Caribe State - 11:05 p.m._

\- You have _got_ to be kidding me with this place – 

\- Yeah. This guy has some _serious_ self-esteem issues – 

They make their way further in. They push past the multitude, deep in its sense of anticipation and way too thrilled for their liking. They survive the trek past the atrium and make their way inside the main event, where the music and crowd are at its peak. 

They shake off the confetti resting on their shoulders and hair, relieved to have survived this far. They are greeted by a rather obnoxious display of consumerism and entitlement as a reward. 

\- I’m guessing his word of the day is “ostentatious” – 

\- Not the word I’d use – 

As they head for the bar (the more secluded one on the right side), Andy’s headset pings.

\- Ok, got a lock on a signal – 

\- That was easy – 

\- _Too_ easy – 

She pulls her phone out of her pocket. Joe pulls in closer, head-resting-on-her-shoulder-and-fake-smile combo in place, to avoid suspicion. And keep any other creeps at bay, for the time being.

The signature is in the ballpark. Not a 100% match, but it’s close enough. 

\- It’s a lead, at least – 

\- No way to confirm if it’s our prize? – 

\- Nope. Security’s a little tight. As expected – 

\- Fucking A – 

\- You’ll have to do a little side-quest to the upper floors and see what’s what – 

\- I’m guessing a guard head count is off the table – 

\- And no way to tap into surveillance either – 

The excitement in the air starts to feel like a ticking time bomb. He’s not looking forward to heading upstairs, but at least it’ll be quiet. 

\- At least we got a basic idea of the layout. I’ll manage – 

\- You always do. Bathroom ain’t an option though – 

\- Not like I was going to fit in the vent shaft anyway –

\- Yeah, you might want to ease up on the protein from now on –

His dagger-like gaze earns him a grin from Andy.

\- Pantry is your way in –

\- I’m supposed to be headed upstairs –

\- Dumbwaiter –

\- Oh –

\- Hope it can handle your weight –

\- Not going to risk it. I don’t mind climbing –

\- Have fun then. But be careful –

\- That’s the golden rule. Not planning to change tactics now –

\- You should’ve brought a helmet then -

\- You’re in a good mood –

She raises her voice, putting on a particularly convincing act in the process.

\- It’s New Year’s, babe – She places a sloppy kiss on his cheek and lowers her voice, before pushing him away, playfully – Now get off your ass and get to work –

He can’t help but smile, loosening up and hearing a satisfying , as he twists his neck and starts tailing a waiter with an empty tray.

\- Bossy –

\- _I heard that_ – 

° ° °

_11:35 p.m._

_\- Reached the penthouse yet? –_

\- Close. Waiting on a patrol –

_\- You can always knock them out –_

\- I was going to. They’re… kind of an item though. Seems like a bit of a dick move –

_\- Oh. Thinking of joining them? –_

A subtle screech of static.

_\- Kinky –_

He freezes in place, momentarily taken aback by Quynh's voice. It doesn’t last long though.

\- I don’t even know what to say –

_\- Then don’t, handsome. Nico’s waiting for you up top –_

He keeps a low profile as he makes his way across the hallway, the wall-to-wall windows on the right making him all kinds of nervous.

\- Andy –

_\- Uh, yeah? –_

\- You wouldn’t mind keeping our comms private, would you? –

Quynh rolls her eyes.

_\- You’re no fun –_

Left turn. He leans over the corner, relieved to see the final set of stairs, waiting a handful of feet across the hall and on the right.

\- It’s called being professional –

He doesn’t miss the glistening pool dead ahead, the fancy looking pool house on the far side of it, or the courtyard to his left, visible thanks to the wall-to-wall windows now on the opposite side. The marble statues leading up to a twisting and complex-looking waterfall are kind of overkill.

_Tacky._

_\- I've got another word for it: Boring. You always this much of a buzzkill on the job? –_

_\- Just when you do your usual unannounced drop-in in our comms. He's usually more talkative –_

He groans. He inmediately regrets it once he realizes where he is and what he's supposed to be doing.

_So much for a stealth approach_

_\- Guess I'll keep quiet next time then –_

_\- You’re no fun -_

Quynh’s laugh isn’t unpleasant by any means. Quite the opposite, actually.

He rolls his eyes anyway.

_I'm kind of getting used to this at this point_

_\- Ha! Nice one -_

\- I’m two seconds away from going dark on comms–

_\- You sound stressed, handsome -_

\- I wonder why –

_\- I can think of a reason or two -_

\- Bite me - 

Andy's chuckle can be faintly heard through the comms. 

Quynh's voice turns smug. At least more than the usual amount.

_\- I'd tell **you** to bite me as well, but then again ...- _

Andy's audio feed crackles. Her coughing is... telling. Too telling.

\- Time and place, Quynh. Fuck - 

_\- You need to get laid, handsome. Good thing you've got company waiting up there already -_

_They're not paying me enough to..._

_Who am I kidding. I'm **not** even getting paid for this._

_And seriously? Did they build a house on top of another and just keep on doing it over and over again?_

__

_How big is this fucking place?_

__

__

_\- Anyway, listen. As fun as this is, we’re kind of on the clock here –_

__

\- If that is another innuendo, Quynh, I swear to God… –

__

_\- No, she’s right. I’m getting some activity over on my end –_

__

_What the hell did he do now._

__

\- Nicholas –

__

He reaches the top of the stairs, only for his wristwatch to ping directly ahead… across yet another hallway. The source of the signal appears to be a structure overlooking both the pool down below and the Atlantic Ocean. Moonlight floods the hallway from his right flank, lights from the courtyard bleeding in from the opposite side, leaving him with a 100 or so feet stretch where he’s exposed on both sides.

__

_Seriously, this creep has a fetish for wall-to-wall windows._

__

_\- Listen, he's a dumbass. But he's not **that** careless –_

__

\- Sure, Quynh –

__

_\- No, I'm with her on this, Joe..._

__

\- When are you not? -

Quynh's laughter fills his ears

_\- Ha! It's funny 'cause it's true -_

__

_\- Heh -_ Andy clears her throat _\- Remote access. Data transfer –_

__

_Shit._

__

_\- Looks like a security protocol. Anything worthwhile on that access point Nicholas is trying to crack is going to be wiped and stored in a back-up server instead, any minute now –_

__

_Oh, look. It's my shitty fucking luck. Again._

__

\- Got an estimate, Andy? How long until… –

__

_\- On it –_

Quynh's voice is the bearer of the most recent batch of bad news

_\- 10 minutes, tops. I wasn’t kidding about being on the clock, kiddos –_

__

_How did she… never mind. Fuck it._

\- Will he make it in time? –

__

He doesn't even care who answers at this point. Things are going to get hairy fast at this rate. Par for the the course. 

__

_\- No way to tell, handsome. Lost his signal a short while back –_

__

\- And you aren’t worried? –

__

_Why the hell am **I**?_

__

_\- He can take care of himself. He's dumb, not incompetent –_

__

_Ok, granted._

__

\- Are we talking about the same person here? –

__

_\- Joe, just focus on getting to Nicholas and… –_

__

\- Kick his ass? –

__

_\- Hah. Get in line. He’s been in a bitchy mood lately –_

__

\- Funny –

__

_\- Well, it wasn’t **me** who pissed him off –_

__

\- Quynh, that we’re sharing comms doesn’t mean… -

__

_\- Gotta roll, handsome. Tell your boyfriend to wrap things up. If he isn't at the rendezvous in thirty, he's walking back to Cancún –_

__

Static. Gone

__

_Guess she wasn't kidding on that last bit._

__

\- One less headache –

__

_\- Shut up, or I'm leaving you here with him -_

__

He reaches for the door.

__

_Never mind._

° ° °

_11:52 p.m._

\- I didn’t buzz you in – 

_Not two seconds have passed since I walked in. Jeez._

\- Hands where I can see them –

\- As much as I’d like to help you out (which I don’t, really), I’m kind of in the middle of something here – 

_You’re pushing your luck._

\- I mean it – 

\- That’s funny, because so do I – 

He takes a slow handful of cautious steps towards him, the gun not really aimed at him, but close enough for the air to feel tense. 

Nicholas finally looks up. His eyebrows raise in question, breaking his neutral, focused expression and being replaced by frustration. 

Beneath that, he can sense some hurt, too. 

\- Ok, now you’re just being an asshole – 

His aim and resolve falter, but he musters up the courage to keep the gun level.

\- You know, as far as plans go, this is a real short-sighted one – 

The sarcasm in Nicholas’ voice gets his blood pumping. His grip on the gun tightens. 

\- Do you ever get tired of trying to be so funny? – 

\- Says the guy pointing a gun at the one person in the room who can actually crack this… piece of shit- 

\- Nicholas, I do not have the time or patience to... – 

\- Hate to break it to you, but unless you’ve become an expert hacker in the past 3 weeks, you’ll have to suck it up and humor me - 

\- _Nicholas_ – 

\- Yusuf. Chill the fuck out, lower that shit down and guard the door - 

He momentarily loses his cool. Stubborn bastard.

_He’s right._

_When’d he get so bossy though?_

\- Oh, for fuck’s sake – 

He turns around, walking backwards as he points the gun towards the door instead. 

He’s not getting access to that info unless Nicholas manages to break past whatever security the creep’s got on his work station. It must be some high-level shit if it’s giving Nicholas a headache. 

\- Was that so hard? – 

\- Shut up – 

_You really could cut the tension in here with a knife._

\- Run into any trouble on the way up? – 

\- Not a great time to chat – 

\- It never is with you – 

He sighs, struggling to maintain some balance between staying alert and professional, and just being a straight-up dick. 

_Just breathe._

_In… and out._

\- Only ran into a handful of patrols, but they weren’t too loaded –

_Or smart._

\- Should make things a little easier on the way out at least – 

\- Unlikely, given our track record so far – 

\- Optimism, Yusuf. It helps – 

\- Yeah, yeah – 

He’d… taken it for granted. His enthusiasm and how talkative he is while on the job. It’s frustrating, but it keeps him balanced out. And granted, his sense of humor is solid. 

Both of them being on a bad mood though? Seems like a recipe for disaster. The job’s stressful enough as it is. 

\- Someone’s tense – 

\- Whatever gave you that impression? – 

\- The gun-waving macho act is kind of telling – 

\- Is this going to take long? – 

\- If you keep being an ass, it just might – 

As Nicholas keeps busy (and quiet) typing his hands off, he takes a moment to clear his head. As much as he can, given how stressful the situation is. 

The window’s being so damn large is driving him up the wall. He’s only got two eyes.

Too many blind spots.

\- All kidding aside though. Anything noteworthy happened on the way here? – 

\- It’s way too quiet for my liking - 

\- Is there _anything_ you like? - 

He rolls his eyes.

\- At all? -

\- Not having to watch your ass on top of my own is up there –

\- It’s not like you of all people got anything to be worried about in that regard - 

\- I don’t… need you getting killed on my conscience, so yeah. I actually kind of do –

The pause that follows is telling. He breathes, resisting the urge to turn back and gauge Nicholas’ reaction.

\- Didn’t know you cared – 

_In… and out._

\- I know I can be a bit of a dick sometimes… - 

\- A bit? – 

\- …but I’m not a total asshole, Nicholas – 

\- You have a funny way of showing it – 

_Just try it, once._

_In... and out._

\- How’s the arm? – 

\- That... came out of nowhere – 

\- Just... - _In... and out_ \- humor me – 

\- It’s… healing. Still sore, but uh, functional enough for some light work – 

_I think you picked the wrong line of work._

\- Let’s avoid bringing too much attention to ourselves, just in case - 

\- Yeah. Although, given our track record... – 

A chuckle escapes from his lips. 

He can picture Nicholas’ smile with surprising ease, much to his frustration. 

_Progress._

\- At least the view is nice - 

He can’t bring himself to marvel at the ocean view now on his back or the pool on his left flank while also guarding the door. He’s not denying it, but it doesn’t seem like the best time for sightseeing.

\- We’re too exposed – 

_And alone._

\- That’s why you’re on guard-duty, given you just _love_ waving that gun around –

His voice is a mix of neutrality and disappointment that is sending an unpleasant shiver down his spine. The sarcasm remains, but it feels neutered in comparison to the other underlying emotions.

_Thanks for the guilt-trip. I mean, it’s kind of deserved, but still…_

_Why the fuck did I think pointing my gun at him would help?_

\- Sorry about that – 

\- That was pretty shitty – 

\- It’s not lethal – 

\- What? – 

\- Tranquilizer rounds – 

_I know you hate guns._

\- Oh. Still – 

\- Yeah, yeah – 

\- Just… breathe. We can spar once I’m done to get it off your chest if you want -

_That… isn’t such a bad idea, actually._

_Although, being so close to him again…_

\- As far as ways of letting off steam… - 

_Oh, fuck it._

He relaxes as much as he possibly can, Andy’s words reverberating in the back of his mind.

– I guess we could do a lot…– 

The glass shatters. 

Nico curses.

Lights out.

_Dumbass._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love the "soundtrack" project I'm working on the side, but Studio Ghibli music really is chicken soup for the soul, Jesus FUCK. 
> 
> PYS - Relaxing Guitar Studio Ghibli Music Complete Collection:  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RWopiMiKKwI
> 
> My happy song of the week (seriously, it's so fucking positive and beautiful:  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p0cgCVsq5oA
> 
> We'll be alright, you guys.


	6. Joker and the Thief

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _January 1st, 2020 - 12:09 a.m._  
>    
> He gasps, agonizing pain still fresh in his mind. Literally.
> 
> _Did my head **fucking explode**?_
> 
> \- Oh, you **sick fucking bastard** – 
> 
> Nico’s hand is on his chest. The other one’s on the back of his neck.
> 
> He lets it slide, this one time. 
> 
> He can’t even open his eyes. 
> 
> _Why do I feel… so wet?_
> 
> _Maybe my head did fucking explode._
> 
> \- **Fuck** , Joe. You scared the **shit** out of me –
> 
> \- Yeah… let’s not do that again -

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates on Wednesday's MY ASS.
> 
> Also, I shuffled things around with the last two chapters. 
> 
> This is where we pretend like Chapter 6 was never actually posted and that, yes. Chapter 5 has ALWAYS been that long.
> 
> ENJOY!

## Joker and the Thief 

_January 1st, 2020 - 12:09 a.m._

He gasps, agonizing pain still fresh in his mind. Literally.

_Did my head **fucking explode**?_

\- Oh, you **sick fucking bastard** – 

Nico’s hand is on his chest. The other one’s on the back of his neck.

He lets it slide, this one time. 

He can’t even open his eyes. 

_Why do I feel… so wet?_

_Maybe my head **did** fucking explode._

\- **Fuck** , Joe! You scared the **shit** out of me –

\- Yeah… let’s not do that again - 

Nicholas’ laughter rings in his ears. It’s loud. But it’s comforting, if he’s being totally honest. 

Andy’s right. He’s on the wrong line of work. He’s like a teddy bear visiting the aquarium, and deciding to go for a swim with the sharks. Outside the cage, just for the hell of it.

His hand lands on Nicholas’ shoulder. He needs to keep himself grounded somehow. 

_Why is your heart beating so damn fast though?_

_It feels… funny. Nice._

_**Nice?** _

\- Why are you so nervous? - 

\- Oh, you’ve got _some nerve_ –

He laughs.

It hurts. 

\- Just lie still, Joe. Fuck – 

\- We need to get the hell out of here – 

\- I think we can spare a goddam minute, given the circumstances – 

_Minute. Time. On the clock. Remote…access. Service? Server._

\- Fuck. I forgot – 

\- Well… you did get shot in the head – 

\- No, the… fuck. They warned me. The data transfer – 

He makes a move to stand, only for Nicholas’ grip to tighten on his chest and keep him on a sitting position. 

_I’d forgotten how deceptively strong he is._

\- They. You mean Andy? And Quynh – 

\- Yeah, she uh… _fuck that hurts_ – 

\- **Hold still** – 

\- Let… ugh. Fine – 

\- What happened with Andy and Quynh? – He pauses - Did they run off together? I swear to God, those two… - 

He sounds both exasperated and amused. 

He can't exactly hold it against him. 

\- No. I mean, who knows. Maybe later? – 

His hand is still in Nicholas’ shoulder. 

It’s warm. Familiar.

_He smells great, too._

_Wait, **what?**_

\- Did they literally tell you they were off to… do stuff? Because that would be… – 

\- No, they’re… still here. Before I got shot at least. They were down at the reception. Warned me about some remote… server. A security protocol. Data transfer –

His eyes open, pain slowly but surely becoming less of a nuisance. 

_Why are the stars moving so much?_

_And what the hell is that noise?_

_Fucking migraine._

\- The data in the access point. The one you were tapping into? They might have detected you. There was some security protocol active. Data wipe. The info we need is now on a remote server –

_Fucking fireworks._

_Thought it was gunshots for a moment._

_I’m going to sleep for a week after this shit._

\- You sound… drunk – 

\- Really, Nico? – 

_Nicholas._

_Fuck. ___

____

\- Sorry. Just… lie still. There ain’t much else we can do now – 

____

\- Where are we? – 

____

\- Safe… er than we were, at least. Had to get us out of there, but I couldn’t blink us very far. I, uh… - 

____

His hand is covered in blood. His expression apologetic.

__\- Things got messy –_ _

_Is that my blood?_

____

\- You don’t say – 

____

\- Shut up – 

____

\- Why am I wet? – 

____

\- I panicked. I, uh… blinked us into the pool. To get us out of the line of fire. Sorry – 

____

He waves him off, lazily.

____

\- It’s fine – 

____

He pulls himself up, wrapping his other hand around Nicholas’, in an effort to reassure and move past his grip on his chest.

____

_Whatever. I’ll say something shitty to mask it later._

____

\- We really need to get out of here - 

____

\- Wait, what about the… – 

____

\- It’s not here anymore - 

____

He manages to reach a crouching position that mirrors Nicholas’.

____

\- That complicates things – 

____

He kinda misses the warmth of Nicholas’ body.

____

\- Guess our luck hasn’t changed – 

____

Nicholas chuckles.

____

\- I should make a habit out of shooting your ass. You’re way less tense. Funnier, too – 

____

\- The ice is thin, Nicholas –

____

_Wait._

____

____

_No._

____

_**Fuck.**_

____

____

_He’s wounded._

____

_FUCK._

____

____

\- Nico, what the hell...? – 

____

He leans in, hand reaching out for disgusting shade of crimson, making his own pain and discomfort fade into the background.

____

_How the hell are you still standing?_

____

The gunshot misses him by mere inches.

____

What feel like a hundred more follow shortly after.

____

It’s doing wonders for his migraine.

____

\- **GET DOWN!** – 

____

\- I’M ALREADY FUCKING DOWN, **COME HERE!** – 

____

Nicholas takes his hand and closes his eyes.

____

He braces for the revolting, dizzying sensation that makes lunch want to burst out his mouth.

____

And… 

____

Nothing.

____

_Could this fucking night get **any** worse?_

____

\- Well, **fuck** – 

____

The door behind Nico bursts open.

____

Two tangos. Armed.

____

He pulls Nicholas by the collar of his shirt. Drags him forward, then behind him. He snatches the gun from Nico's belt while he’s at it. 

____

The guns ricochet off his arm and torso. A metallic-sounding and rain-like symphony that hurts like HELL.

____

_Being this focused would have helped when they shot me in the **fucking head**._

____

His head is shielded by his arm. Some bullets ricochet off of it too.

____

His other hand takes aim. 

____

He’s still crouched, body shielding Nico. 

____

\- **SHIT!** – 

____

The guard who’s closest falls down to the ground with a thud.

____

The other one hesitates, just enough.

____

He joins his comrade down on the ground shortly after.

____

A handful of bullets are still lodged in his skin, all over the place.

____

_Ok, now I’m **really** pissed._

_____ _

Nico’s hand latches on to his own.

_____ _

He takes a second too long to realize why.

_____ _

The snapping finger-like sound is lost amongst the hurricane of bullets, shattering glass, and his internal cursing out of frustration and disgust.

_____ _

He falls down less than a second later with a smack, Nicholas’ body hitting the slippery, sparkling clean and marble-like floor right behind him.

_____ _

The mix of vertigo, nausea and being crushed by an elephant at the same time is still being processed by his mind.

_____ _

Their pained groans are the only sound in… wherever the hell they are. 

_____ _

It’s jarring, to say the least.

_____ _

Nico coughs, his discomfort being clear, and becoming priority in his mind.

_____ _

\- You shouldn’t have done that – 

_____ _

\- Well, you didn’t... – He coughs – ...you didn’t have to act like a **fucking meat shield** either! – 

_____ _

They’re in the pool house now.

_____ _

\- I can walk it off. Can you? – 

_____ _

\- I kinda have to – 

_____ _

Nicholas’ hand tugs at his chest. He hasn’t stood up. He doesn’t seem willing or able to do it just yet.

_____ _

He feels sick at the sight.

_____ _

_Why would you fucking do that now? You've lost too much fucking blood, Nico._

_____ _

His heart smacks down to the floor with an imaginary, yet thunderous _splat_.

_____ _

_Seriously. Fuck._

_____ _

\- Can you walk? – 

_____ _

\- Can you **WAIT?** – 

_____ _

\- We’re sitting ducks in here, ok? We need to bail – 

_____ _

\- Heh. Ducks – 

_____ _

\- Nicholas –

_____ _

\- Yusuf. I can’t… fucking walk right now – 

_____ _

_The exhaustion in his eyes is… it’s all wrong._

_____ _

_We’re getting out of this hellhole, one way or another._

_____ _

\- Then I’ll just – He reaches down and places Nico’s arm around his shoulder, his own arm wrapping tightly around his waist to keep him relatively steady – have to carry your lazy-ass out of here – 

_____ _

_Is it just me, or is he, uhm... heavier than… last time I was under him?_

_____ _

Beneath the sweat and dried blood, he smells as enticingly as always.

_____ _

_Not a great time, Yusuf._

_____ _

\- You know… this is the part where I’d make a god-awful pun about lifting and gym membership’s? But, uh… it’s not coming – 

_____ _

\- I see no reason to push our luck -

_____ _

\- Shut up –

_____ _

He places the gun in Nico’s hand. He’s a better shot anyway. Nico doesn't have the energy to complain. Disgust flashes through his face in a heartbeat, being dismissed as he focuses on keeping them safe. Relatively.

_____ _

He pushes the door open with his foot. He’s not even pretending to be stealthy anymore.

_____ _

The guards turn around. 

He twists their bodies around, wrapping his arms around Nico.

He mentally prepares himself for the barrage of bullets about to wreck his back. 

_____ _

He groans at the sound of the handgun right next to his fucking ear, accompanied by the excruciating massage, annihilating his back.

_____ _

It's as painful and infuriating as always.

_____ _

_**FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT GUNS.** _

_____ _

Nico’s reflexes (and accuracy) remain as enviable as ever, somehow.

_____ _

The guards collapse shortly after, their bodies colliding against the carpet with a satisfying _thud_ , and grunts of pain escaping from their mouths.

_____ _

Nicholas leans against the wall-to-wall window, hand pressed against the dried blood stain.

_____ _

\- You play meat shield **ONE MORE FUCKING TIME** , and I’m the one shooting your ass! – 

_____ _

He releases the magazine, confirming with a curse that, yeah: Their ammo supply is _the_ definition of scarce.

_____ _

They’re running on fumes in every damn possible way, as it turns out.

_____ _

\- Yeah, yeah – 

_____ _

He leans down to help Nico wrap his arm around his shoulder once again.

_____ _

The rushing steps are overshadowed by a commanding, strangely intimidating voice.

_____ _

\- GET DOWN – 

_____ _

Against his better judgement, he does. 

_____ _

_Wait._

_____ _

_**NO.** _

_____ _

The bullets start raining. 

_____ _

He tackles Nico. Through the window. 

_____ _

As the glass shatters, he realizes his mistake.

_____ _

Too little too late.

_____ _

Nico’s hand wraps around his arm. Hard. Holding on for dear life.

_____ _

The deafening and disorienting cacophony accompanying their fall is interrupted abruptly, as the world around them is compressed and released in the blink of an eye.

° ° °

_12:33 a.m._

They land on a mattress, of all things (and thankfully so). 

Their joined bodies collide with it, hard enough to send them flying as high as the ceiling, and back down on the bed. They stop bouncing a short while after. 

He resists the urge to move, expecting (and dreading) Yusuf to push him off. Any second now.

He doesn’t.

The subdued beat of their hearts might have something to do with it. Even Yusuf’s stubborn ass can’t argue that the feeling is… comforting. A welcome moment of familiarity, serenity and quiet that, he at least, wishes would stretch on for a lifetime. 

It’s stupid though. 

_Why is it so damn easy to fall for it, all over again?_

_Wasn’t once painful enough?_

_This… isn’t painful though._

It’s one of the many reasons why what happened after Málaga felt so... wrong. Incongruous

Prior to their fallout, he’d never felt such a strong sense of belonging. Of trust. Of abandon, with that indescribable and god-awful sensation, ever-present in his chest, suddenly becoming mute. 

Despite everything… it’s still nice. It still feels like home.

_Does it feel as right for Joe as it does to him? Is that why he hasn’t moved? Why his arms are still wrapped around his body?_

The pain is still present. It just can’t be at the forefront, given the scenario he’s stumbled upon. 

He can’t help but wonder just how telling it is that he blinked them here, of all other places he could’ve pictured in his mind.

As he concentrated his mind on getting them the hell out of what was most certainly the end of the line, his subconscious took the reins of the situation. He brought them to a place that is arguably safe, and indeed, _pretty damn telling_

Right now, his mind doesn’t seem willing (or able) to pay attention to the pressing, unpleasant sensation near his waist, or what might happen once they are inevitably forced to stand. The terrible puns he’ll most definitely speak into existence to ease his nerves, as has become the norm. The words that may come out of Yusuf’s lips. 

His lips.

_Why hasn’t he said anything?_

_Do I want him to? Would it be so bad to just… stay here for a while?_

_This is… too nice. **Too perfect.**_

_Too painful._

_**Too much.** _

_Just… say something._

_**Anything.** _

\- That’s one way to get a guy in bed – 

_OUT OF ALL THE MIND-NUMBINGLY STUPID THINGS YOU COULD HAVE SAID, YOU GO WITH **THAT**?_

\- You just… obliterated the moment –

_YOU DON’T SAY?_

\- I mean… – He coughs, debating whether to move. The bullet wound suddenly decides to once again become relevant. Because of course it does – ... _ugh_. We could just… fuck this hurts… -

\- Alright, move – 

_Do I have to?_

\- If I told you that I can’t, would you carry me out to the car? – 

\- Nicholas – 

\- I’ll take that as a no – 

He rolls off into Yusuf’s side, groaning. The physical pain is bearable. It’s the emotional dilemma that’s making him want to make himself small, cover his face with his hands and just… disappear off the face of the Earth. 

_Stupid._

\- You… - 

Yusuf hesitates.

It’s such a rare occurrence, his hectic train of thought is stopped dead on its ass, expectation cautiously building up within his chest.

_You… what?_

\- Think we should check that? – He nods towards the now dry stain on his right side. It was a close call. Too close - Before heading out? – 

_Sure. Because shirtless-ness turned out great for us last time._

_I mean, it was…_

_Never mind._

\- I can manage – 

_That’s debatable._

\- You sure? – 

_Now that is funny._

He stands up, renewed energy helping him stand on his feet.

\- Let’s… let’s just get the hell out of here – 

_Why the fuck did I blink us here?_

_Why hasn’t he said anything?_

_Does he even care?_

Yusuf pauses, long enough for his heart to break all over again.

As he makes his way to the door to check the coast is clear, he stands, as gracefully as a New Year’s drunktard. 

_At this rate, he might just have to carry me out._

_Unconscious._

_I really hate my life sometimes._


	7. Dream a Little Dream of Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Cancún-Tulum Highway - 2:19 a.m._
> 
> The highway feels like an island. 
> 
> Isolated, quiet, and all kinds of peaceful. The kinds he could easily get used to.
> 
> The moon is directly above, illuminating the highway the same way the sun would if it was midday. At a certain point during the trip back to the hotel, the weather reached just the spot. Warm enough to warrant rolling down the windows in the back, but not too chilly for him to worry about Nico or himself needing a currently unavailable jacket.
> 
> He glances at the clock, his eyes doubling back as he notices the date.
> 
> _Well, what do you know?_
> 
> New Year’s has become a date similar to his birthday. He only takes notice by accident. Or if Andy happens to be around to remind him. Or Nile. 
> 
> A sigh escapes from his lips.
> 
> He hasn’t seen her in a while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **End of Act I.**

## Dream a Little Dream of Me

_Cancún-Tulum Highway - 2:19 a.m._

The highway feels like an island. 

Isolated, quiet, and all kinds of peaceful. The kinds he could easily get used to.

The moon is directly above, illuminating the highway the same way the sun would if it was midday. At a certain point during the trip back to the hotel, the weather reached just the spot. Warm enough to warrant rolling down the windows in the back, but not too chilly for him to worry about Nico or himself needing a currently unavailable jacket.

He glances at the clock, his eyes doubling back as he notices the date.

_Well, what do you know?_

New Year’s has become a date similar to his birthday. He only takes notice by accident. Or if Andy happens to be around to remind him. Or Nile. 

A sigh escapes from his lips.

He hasn’t seen her in a while.

He’d stop the car dead on its tires, do a 180°, and drive back to the state, if she was there waiting for him.

He’s got more than enough on his plate, the mental checklist of things that conflict him to no end growing by the minute. It feels never-ending.

He **really** needs to get this off from his chest, _pronto_.

It’s not that he doesn’t trust Andy. It’s her experience that’s the problem. The way she always seems to be several steps ahead of him, in various regards. Her opinion is as valuable as it’s always been, but it’s… it’s different, for lack of a better word. Quynh’s influence has become more evident, with her presence in Andy’s life being so blatant it’s become amusing.

He’s not exactly jealous per se, but their relationship has shifted, in his eyes. So has he, in turn.

They’ve never really felt the need to express their emotions. With so many words, at least. They had an unspoken agreement to keep things clinical. No bullshit. Cut the crap and get straight to the point. What happened yesterday being the most extreme they’ve ever gone. Needless to say, it caught him off guard. 

It’s become the norm in their relationship, as of late. 

She’s shamelessly pushing him out of his comfort zone. 

Frustrating at first. Infuriating, on a bad day. But it’s working. Which only adds to the frustration.

The non-lethal mentality. The unsuccessful (yet arguably healthier and much less annoying) attempts at leaving the guns-blazing approach until it is absolutely necessary to do so. It helps him sleep better at night, so that’s a plus.

Her laughter. Their banter. The casualness and light-heartedness of their relationship, now frequently spoken into existence with surprising ease. He’s getting used to it. Seeing her so full of energy and so talkative and so joyful.

That’s what he’s truly jealous of.

Nico gasps himself awake.

A pained groan escapes from his lips, one hand rubbing gently at his side, the other doing the same in an effort to rid the remains of sleep off from his eyes.

\- Fuck, man – 

\- Feeling better? – 

\- It… it hurts like fucking _hell_ – 

He struggles to think of something to say and lighten the mood, same way Nico usually does.

He’s got nothing.

His mind’s too distracted. Too many variables to keep track off. Too many conflicting emotions.

He’s hurting like hell, in a very different way than Nico.

\- I’m sorry – 

\- You drag my sorry ass out of there, and you’re sorry? – 

\- I mean… - 

\- I'm just... just messing with you – 

Nico waves him off, letting his eyes rest and chuckling, as much as the gunshot wound allows him.

He can’t help but feel guilty, for some reason. 

Seeing Nicholas so distraught and exhausted is… it feels wrong. It’s unnerving to see someone so light-hearted and enthusiastic and so obnoxiously alive, suddenly become so adult and troubled. Like a candle, struggling to stay aflame as a blizzard rolls around. A raging fire, incongruously turning into ash and smoke in the blink of an eye.

Is he partly to blame for it?

Can he make amends for the things he’s said? Or rather, the things he hasn’t.

The resentment. The exasperation and hermetic qualities he’s developed to keep him at an arm’s length.

_Would it… be so wrong to let him in?_

_Doesn’t Nicholas deserve a break?_

_Doesn’t **he **?****_

****

\- I’m not just sorry about tonight – 

********

Nicholas turns his head, the car suddenly becoming a vacuum.

********

_The floor is yours._

********

He feels at a loss for words. Of courage.

********

_Where does I even start?_

********

\- I’ve… I don’t even know where to start – 

********

_Why does Nico make it seem so easy? So fucking effortless?_

********

How can he put into words just how hurt and confused and… 

********

How can he get around to explaining how conflicted he is?

********

_Is it even possible?_

********

\- You know, there’s not a day that goes by that I don’t look back on that night – 

********

Nicholas’ words claw at his chest, pushing the air out of his lungs and pushing him to the very edge of composure. 

********

_In… and out._

********

He wants to scream. 

********

He wants to excise these feelings of longing and hurt. He wants them **out**.

********

He just wants it to _stop_.

********

********

\- Why did you leave then? – 

********

The words come out strangely lacking in emotion. The venom is subtle, but it’s definitely there.

********

The question lingers in the air, the silence feeling like a bomb under the seat.

********

Even Nico seems unable to keep pushing the subject. Or maybe he’s afraid of what will happen if he does.

********

Turns out he’s not.

********

\- Are you _fucking_ **kidding me**? – 

********

The hurt in his voice feels like someone stabbed him square through the chest. 

********

No warning. No remorse. No sense of anticipation or caution whatsoever.

********

Nicholas’ voice is strained. Loaded. 

********

It hurts to hear it, just as much as it hurts Nicholas to speak the words into existence.

********

\- I woke up in your _fucking_ bed and you were fucking **gone** –

********

He doesn’t step on the brakes. He doesn’t even slow down. He’s not going fast, but his heart certainly is.

********

\- I wake up. _Naked_. Feeling like I’m in fucking _cloud nine_ , and you have the **balls** to ask me why I left? _You weren’t there _, Yusuf. What the **fuck** was I supposed to think?! – __

********

__\- I came back –_ _

****____ ** **

\- **THEN WHY DIDN’T YOU?!** –

****____ ** **

He isn’t the only one who’s struggling to keep the tears at bay.

****____ ** **

Now it’s just a matter of who’s going to break down first.

****____ ** **

\- HOW WOULD **YOU** HAVE FELT IF YOU’D WOKEN UP AND **I** WAS THE ONE THAT FUCKING LEFT? – 

****____ ** **

\- I WAS…-

****____ ** **

\- YOU WERE **WHAT**? – 

****____ ** **

_What._

****____ ** **

_What._

****____ ** **

_**Why** did I leave?_

****____ ** **

_Why did I fucking **leave**?_

****____ ** **

_What are you so afraid of?_

****____ ** **

\- I was… - 

****____ ** **

_Just say it._

****____ ** **

Nicholas’ gaze turns into daggers. 

****____ ** **

_What did you think of me when I left you there and didn't come back until you were gone?_

****____ ** **

_The exact same fucking thing I would have thought, if the tables had been turned._

****____ ** **

_A dipshit, back-stabbing and hurtful move that would’ve pushed me to tears._

****____ ** **

_Just.. try it. **Once**. _

****____ ** **

\- I was _scared_ – 

****____ ** **

Nicholas breathes.

****____ ** **

He doesn’t realize he’d been holding his own breath until he replicates the gesture.

****____ ** **

It hurts. His insides are doing flips. His chest tightens. His eyes feel wet.

****____ ** **

\- I was _fucking_ **terrified** –

****____ ** **

All this time. Ever since that night.

****____ ** **

\- And I didn’t know what to say. What not to say – 

****____ ** **

For the longest time.

****____ ** **

\- That night was… - 

****____ ** **

Indescribable.

****____ ** **

\- I can’t even begin to describe how good and safe it felt to be in your arms – 

****____ ** **

To feel like the world stood still for just a moment. 

****____ ** **

_Like I could fall apart, only for you to help me pick up the pieces and put them back in place._

****____ ** **

_Like I had nothing to be afraid of, ever again._

****____ ** **

_I was fucking **safe**. _

****____ ** **

_And I left you there to feel the exact fucking **opposite**._

****____ ** **

Nicholas stares deep into his eyes, his eyes confirming everything he already suspected.

****____ ** **

_You've been every bit as hurt and confused as I’ve been, ever since that day, haven't you? ___

****____ ** **

__

****____ ** **

___Maybe even more._ _ _

****______ _ _ ** **

He averts his gaze once he realizes that, yes. 

****______ _ _ ** **

_Definitely more._

****______ _ _ ** **

_And I didn’t realize it until now._

****______ _ _ ** **

_How could I be so **stupid**?_

****______ _ _ ** **

His voice is hoarse enough to feel like rust is lodged in his throat.

****______ _ _ ** **

\- And I **never** should have left you there – 

****______ _ _ ** **

So many things he still longs to say. So many things Nico has the right to know. 

****______ _ _ ** **

_The taste of your skin. The feel of your lips against mine. The touch of your hands, exploring my body as I try to make you feel just as blissful as you did me._

****______ _ _ ** **

So little courage to do so. 

****______ _ _ ** **

The tightness remains, but he musters up the courage to say one last thing before growing quiet.

****______ _ _ ** **

__\- And_ I’m sorry_ – 

****____ ** **

At a certain point, he started to slow down. He hadn’t realized that he stopped the car until now.

****____ ** **

\- I’m really fucking sorry, Nico – 

****____ ** **

He doesn’t need to look at Nico to notice him wiping the tears away. He replicates the gesture, once he feels the tear gliding down his cheek, getting lost in his facial hair.

****____ ** **

The pain Nico’s seemingly going through, is an amalgamation of heartache and physical pain that he can’t bring himself to picture, much less wish, even on his worst enemy.

****____ ** **

\- Yeah – 

****____ ** **

His voice comes out defeated, but not resentful or accusatory. 

****____ ** **

\- I get it – 

****____ ** **

Nico pauses, eyes fixated on the road ahead. 

****____ ** **

His hand alternates between a fist and open, tips of his fingers rubbing against one another. 

****____ ** **

Debating. 

****____ ** **

\- And I appreciate what you said, because I know you meant it – 

****____ ** **

_In… and out._

****____ ** **

\- When you woke up, I was there. Unconscious, but I was – 

****____ ** **

He meets Nico’s gaze. 

****____ ** **

\- My experience waking up was different than yours. And it wasn’t a pleasant one in the slightest – 

****____ ** **

_I know._

****____ ** **

\- I was terrified too, Joe. But unlike you, I… -

****____ ** **

He grows quiet.

****____ ** **

He breathes, one last tear sliding across his bruised cheek.

****____ ** **

He silently wishes he could reach out and kiss it away. Caress him, and promise Nico, time and time and time again that he’ll never hurt him again.

****____ ** **

Never again, for as long as he’s a part of Nicholas’ life.

****____ ** **

\- Promise me you’ll **never** pull a stunt like that. Ever again – 

****____ ** **

****____ ** **

His desire to make amends and reassure Nico that he will indeed **never** do something like that again compels him to answer straightaway. 

****____ ** **

****____ ** **

He reflects on it for a second.

****____ ** **

He wants to look deep into Nicholas’s eyes when he confirms it. 

****____ ** **

He owes him that much. 

****____ ** **

He really does mean it. With every cell, fiber, tissue and emotional scar in his body.

****____ ** **

\- _I swear_ – 

****____ ** **

Nico stares, unjudging and with a degree of seriousness that soon becomes alarmingly vexing. 

****____ ** **

He’s been given a chance to make this right. To prove to Nico that he never meant to hurt him. To show him that his love for him is as real, tangible and genuine as can be.

****____ ** **

_I don’t deserve you, Nico._

****____ ** **

\- And Yusuf? – 

****____ ** **

_In… and out._

****____ ** **

\- Do us both a favor and leave a **god-fucking** note next time – 

****____ ** **

Nico’s teasing smile is a rising sun, reaching out and extending his hand. A welcoming embrace he’s now hopelessly devoted to. A heavenly light, peeking through the silk-like curtains back in Málaga. Leisurely, determined and true. 

****____ ** **

The laughter bursting out from his chest, is the definition of catharsis. 

****____ ** **

_Is this a dream?_

****____ ** **

_Am I truly allowed to feel this much joy?_

****____ ** **

The promise of a next time reverberates through his chest, filling him with warmth and peace, unlike any he’s experienced prior to this moment. 

****____ ** **

\- Assuming I’m stupid enough to leave your side now? – 

****____ ** **

_I’m going to keep you safe, my love._

****____ ** **

_I promise you that too._

****____ ** **

\- My taste in men is improving, at least – 

****____ ** **

\- You were always the funny one - 

****____ ** **

He laughs once again, Nico following suit. 

****____ ** **

_I’ve been looking for someone like you my whole life._

****____ ** **

_I'm not letting you go._

****____ ** **

Nico’s face, filled with tears, contorted by joy, only further confirms what his answer would most likely be. 

****____ ** **

_Neither am I._

° ° °

_Live Aqua Beach Resort, Cancún – 4:43 a.m._

He dismisses the valet amiably when he pulls up at Nico’s hotel. The man waves him off with a sleepy, thankful smile.

As the dawn shows hints of its approach into the coast, the coldness of the air grows, sending a shiver through his arms and down his spine. 

As the car grinds to a halt, the quietness of the hotel zone catches his attention. 

It’s odd, seeing such a thrumming and energetic place be so devoid of emotion or sound. Unnerving, to an extent. 

A handful of tired-looking passerby’s wave at each other, despite being total strangers. A couple runs across the sidewalk, focused, not a care in the world of the ruckus that’d taken place mere hours prior.

The city has a different feel to it, now that the weight has been lifted off of his shoulders. It’s not entirely gone, per se, but his desire to drop his ass on the bed and sleep for a day feels like a guarantee, rather than a vague possibility.

It’s refreshing.

Nico hasn’t moved from his seat, either. 

He stares upwards, shoulders giving away his exhaustion, marveling at how massive the hotel is.

He looks up, unable to feel small at the site. Inadequate.

Ostentatious, indeed. 

_How big is this fucking place?_

\- So, I take it’s a five-star hotel then? - 

\- It’s, uh… - He chuckles, gifting him with a curious smile – it is, actually. And the price is up there as well – 

\- Bet the view is nice – 

Nico gifts him with a dazzling smile and a wink of the eye that sends his heart on a ride to the moon.

_I want to kiss those cheeky lips of yours until you’re gasping for breath._

The intensity of Yusuf’s jet-black daggers, is soon replicated by Nico’s emerald set of eyes.

The tiredness keeps them at a literal arm’s length, despite both aching to shorten the distance in that very instant. 

There’s a fair share of untold emotions, and a good night’s sleep standing in the way, too.

His next reunion with Yusuf can’t come soon enough.

\- It’s not terrible – 

Joe debates it for a split second, before throwing caution to the wind. 

_Fuck it._

\- My view right now isn’t half-bad either – 

\- Half-bad? – 

Yusuf rolls his eyes.

\- I’m trying to be romantic here – 

\- Your concept of romance is quite different from mine then – 

\- Shut up – 

Nico’s hand caresses Joe’s cheek with reverence. Kindness. 

Joe gives in to the sensation, basking in the moment, and allowing his eyes to succumb to the temptation of closing.

\- Beneath that cold, moody exterior, you’re just a hopeless romantic, aren’t you? – 

Joe’s hand lands on Nico’s. 

Nico’s resolve to kiss Joe aches in his chest as ragingly as wildfire.

Joe’s expression then turns somber, sudden as a heartbeat.

It takes a similar suddenness for Nico to make sense of it. 

\- That night meant a lot to me. You know that, right? – 

Nico allows the world to settle in, easing his heartache. 

It’ll heal, soon enough. Moments like this, make it all the easier.

\- I do now – 

\- And what I said back there… back on the road – His determination is as reassuring as it is captivating - I meant every word, Nico – 

He stares deep into Yusuf’s eyes, quickly feeling overwhelmed by the emotion in them. 

The intensity he boldly brings into the equation is a different kind, than the one chock-full of hurt he’s gotten used to seeing in the past 6 months. It feels every bit as careless as it feels genuine. 

They find themselves in a nostalgia-inducing and intimate piece of heaven in that moment.

Needless to say, neither is willing to part on it just yet. 

Seeing him with his guard down; with his vulnerability laid bare so blatantly and oh, so recklessly… it takes his breath away, in more ways than one.

He’d nearly forgotten what it was like to lose himself in Yusuf’s embrace. It really does feel right, even after all this time.

And he truly _does_ mean every word. 

\- And you’re not being the slightest bit subtle about it, either – 

Yusuf’s gaze once again regains its sharpness, his eyebrow giving away how he, yet again, annihilated the moment. 

_It’s like you don’t know me at all, darling._

\- This going to be a thing from here on out, isn’t it? – 

\- If by _this_ you mean my endless supply of charm… yes. You better get used to it – 

\- You’ve got a weird sense of humor – 

\- Wait till you hear about my taste in men – 

Joe shoves Nico’s hand away with a groan, short-lived, given Nico’s display of enjoyment (heartfelt, vaguely irritating and endlessly charming) soon growing contagious.

When their laughter dies down, Joe licks his lips, building up anticipation in Nico’s exhausted mind. 

\- I think you’re doing just fine on that front – 

A dozen terrible (truly god-awful) puns flash across his mind. He settles for some sentimentality instead. 

Might as well keep things balanced. The ying to Yusuf’s yang, and all that jazz.

\- You know, I could get used to getting lost in your eyes –

Yusuf’s bashful smile places a deep sense of satisfaction in his chest. He could get used to making him blush the way he just did.

\- And I could get used to making your cheeks turn _so fucking red_ as well – 

Joe strongly debates whether to silence Nico’s hilarity with an equally enthusiastic kiss or to punch him asleep and carry his funny (unconscious) ass to his room.

He might end up doing both at this rate. 

Not today though. They… they have a lot to think about. 

Not to mention some solid fuck-ton of hours of shut-eye to enjoy.

\- This is the part where I kick your funny ass out of the car – 

Nico rolls his eyes at the jab, opening the car door and stepping out good-naturedly.

– I can kick it myself, thank you very much – 

Nico’s smile hasn’t faded in the slightest.

Neither has the blush in Yusuf's cheeks, much to his frustration.

_Asshole._

After closing the door shut, Nico remains in place, seemingly at war with himself whether to jump back into the car or head upstairs.

He walks around the hood of the car. Joe pulls down the window as Nico stops in front of the door. He rests his hands on it, leaning down. 

His smile seems quiet, amusement seemingly having evaporated on the short walk from one side of the car to the opposite one.

\- This was… - _Should I go with funny or serious?_ – so fucking exhausting – 

Their laughter dances into one another as a tired, rhapsodic symphony that fills their hearts with joy, losing itself in the shiver-inducing, strangely comforting, break of dawn.

\- And it was so damn worth it, too - 

_Bit of both, it is._

\- And just so you know… that night meant a lot to me too – 

_You're making not kissing you a real fucking torture, my love._

_Let me give you a taste of your own medicine._

\- I did do most of the work – 

Nico’s wide-eyes and embarrassment is making Joe all kinds of proud.

\- You’re going straight to hell for that – 

His hand latches on to Nico’s collar, as if it were a magnet.

_**Fuck it**._

\- Might as well do my best to earn a good spot – 

Nico’s annoyance and amusement is cut short by Yusuf’s lips, colliding with his own.

The purely physical strength of the kiss feels neutered, in comparison to the warmth and raw emotion fueling it. 

The electricity between them is a sight to behold.

Nico’s hands aimlessly hover over Yusuf, unsure how to convey the passion Yusuf so easily gifts him with his lips. Their tongues reencounter one another, after a seemingly never-ending wait. His fingers find a resting place on Yusuf’s cheeks, pulling him in, welcoming him with a sense of need that is palpable and reciprocated in full.

The longing in Yusuf’s chest settles to a back-and-forth between a gentle purr, and a commanding roar that demands for more. It lifts him up to a state of grace and bliss that feels… indescribable. 

Nico’s fingers tickle at his facial hair, marveled at the feel; lost in the texture; agonizing for more.

The kiss has that movie-like quality of feeling eternal, despite its length being condensed in less than a minute.

It’s glorious.

Their agitated breath is shared once more, after months of the memory and feel being just a fleeting butterfly that constantly visited, yet never settled down. Uncertain and ephemeral. A recurring dream, that made their arousal and heartache (each goddamn morning) be so intense it easily came across as agony.

And now, it’s tangible. It’s Yusuf’s hair, tangling itself around Nico’s fingers and earning a breathless chuckle out of Nico’s moistened lips. It’s Nico’s leisurely and deep intake of breath, drowning him in that inebriating, captivating scent that’s haunted his dreams for months on end. It’s Yusuf’s eyes, struggling not to become an ocean at the intimacy and familiarity of this dream-like situation that is oh, so satisfyingly real.

_Took you long enough._

Joe’s thoughts, find themselves in the ballpark.

_This is what ecstasy feels like, my love._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Act II is going to be WILD. I'm thinking piña colada's, prison break, slow-dancing, bank heist and mixing things up so Nico-Andy and Quynh-Joe get some quality time separately. 
> 
> I'm also working on some more Andy-Quynh domestic/fluffy stuff that I'm really digging. I'll get around to posting the first chapter of Act II late next week (Chapter 7, is it?), so stay tuned! Most likely Saturday or Sunday. 
> 
> Semester starts on Monday for me, and I'm still working on my thesis on the side, but I'm way too attached to this fic to leave it hanging. It'll be a once-a-week-update ( _no it won't_ ) from now on, but I'll make sure it's polished and just right so it's worth the wait.
> 
> Stay safe and take care everyone. To those of you still around I hope you're enjoying this as much as I am!
> 
> Official Soundtrack:  
> https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5XCYwLPOfycjimrdyTXyuE?si=7UgBCkXQSRuD7ycoQZn18w


	8. A Place to Call Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Suite 5019 – 6:20 a.m._
> 
> \- Did he stay? – 
> 
> \- He was too tired to complain about the extra expense now, but he’ll probably give me shit about it later –
> 
> \- Last minute reservation can’t have come cheap, to be fair – 
> 
> \- There might have been some extra money involved, in order to sweeten the deal – 
> 
> \- He’ll forget about it once he takes a look at the buffet –
> 
> \- Yeah… I’ll be sure not to show him the bill for that either –
> 
> Andy pulls at her elbow, a delightful crack resonating as she stretches it over her head.
> 
> \- Is he all tucked in then? –
> 
> \- Let’s just say his impression of a bear in hibernation is pretty on-point – 
> 
> Quynh snorts as she combs her hair, fingers sliding across it with delicacy.
> 
> \- Come on, his snoring can’t be that bad –
> 
> \- I’m surprised you can’t hear him all the way here –
> 
> \- I might be going deaf – She raises her eyebrow, amused - But then again, I’ve gotten used to you doing the exact same, so… –

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Act II.**

##  A Place to Call Home 

_Suite 5019 – January 1st, 2020 - 6:20 a.m._

\- Did he stay? – 

\- He was too tired to complain about the extra expense now, but he’ll probably give me shit about it later –

\- Last minute reservation can’t have come cheap, to be fair – 

\- There might have been some extra money involved, in order to sweeten the deal – 

\- He’ll forget about it once he takes a look at the buffet –

\- Yeah… I’ll be sure not to show him the bill for that either –

Andy pulls at her elbow, a delightful crack resonating as she stretches it over her head.

\- Is he all tucked in then? –

\- Let’s just say his impression of a bear in hibernation is pretty on-point – 

Quynh snorts as she combs her hair, fingers sliding across it with delicacy.

\- Come on, his snoring can’t be that bad –

\- I’m surprised you can’t hear him all the way here –

\- I might be going deaf – She raises her eyebrow, amused - But then again, I’ve gotten used to you doing the exact same, so… – 

Andy scoffs as she kneels down to empty the last drawer. 

The curtain drifts with ghost-like caution, as a tame breeze sneaks into the room, lapping gently at her side.

\- That’s dramatic – 

\- WHAT? I CAN’T HEAR YOU – 

\- Shut up and help me pack – 

\- You look so sexy doing it all by yourself, though – 

\- Quynh – 

\- Ugh. Fine – 

She folds the corner of the page she’s in and starts mindlessly shoving the clothes, stacked at the foot of the bed, into the bag. The spitting image of a pouty teenager.

When she shoves in a pair socks without folding them, Andy snaps.

\- Wait, not like… - 

\- DID YOU SAY SOMETHING? – 

_You are **SO** doing that on purpose._

\- Stop acting like a child. You’re helping me pack anyway – 

\- I’m so bad at it, doll. Seems like a risky move – 

\- Stop being so lazy – 

\- Stop being so _bossy_ – 

\- I’m going to quote you on that next time we’re fooling around in bed – 

\- Assuming we’re ever fooling around in bed again, after this display of dictatorship –

\- Oh, _please_. You are the single _laziest_ … – 

\- Give me a break – 

\- … most laid-back and pampered human being in the history of sexual intercourse… - 

\- When’d you get so cocky? – 

\- … and _now_ you mean to tell me that you’re willing to go **days** without fuck… - 

\- You would literally DIE if I ever decided to hold back on that front – 

Andy cuts herself short, disbelief as clear as a mirror.

She then bursts out laughing. 

\- Yeah, yeah. Laugh it up, you crazy bitch – 

\- If I recall correctly, it was **your** flirting and take-me-to-bed looks, and all the… innuendo festival you put me through, that got us into this in the first place – 

\- Oh, poor you! – 

\- Tell you what. If you, somehow, by the grace of our Lord and all that is holy – Andy pretends not to notice the snort and eye-roll that Quynh doesn’t even try to dissimulate – manage to keep things as innocent as you yourself claim to be, from here up until we reach Honolulu…- 

\- This ought to be good – 

\- You and Nico get to keep the prize this time around –

Quynh deadpans. 

\- I’d almost forgotten how boring you and Yusuf can be – 

\- Oh, fuck you –

\- Fuck _you_! That is a technical fucking guarantee and you know it – 

\- Who’s being cocky now? – 

\- It’s not cockiness, doll. It’s a given. Next up, you’re going to pull a bottle of scotch and ask me and the boys to play truth or dare – 

She gives her the finger as she focuses on fixing the mess Quynh has managed to orchestrate in record time.

_That is the **last** time you help me pack._

Andy then stops dead on her tracks, not paying attention to Quynh’s teasing.

\- … next up, we’re gonna be playing a hide and seek around the pool…- 

\- You want to make things more interesting? – 

Quynh hesitates, taken aback, and suddenly feeling the temperature increase a handful of degrees. 

_There goes that bet. Not that I’m complaining though…_

She playfully approaches Andy from across the bed, seduction suddenly becoming the name of the game.

Andy’s stroke of genius is miles off from the saucy thoughts now flashing across Quynh’s mind. 

The realization that that might be the case makes Quynh stop at the foot of the bed. 

\- Wait. What… kind of _interesting_ are we talking about here? – 

Andy’s gaze makes contact with Quynh, curiosity and confusion breaking her concentration, master plan in-the-making hitting the brakes and reaching full stop in a second flat.

\- Wait. I meant about Joe and… - 

\- Good to know where your mind's at – 

\- How was I supposed to know that you’re in the… - 

\- Have fun in your imaginary threesome, loser – 

\- Oh, my God. Are you jealous? – 

\- I’m annoyed – 

\- Ha! – 

_Never thought I'd see the day..._

\- Have fun with the vibrator tonight –

\- _Yeow_ – 

\- Do the crime, do the time – 

\- Quynh – 

\- Bye – 

She clasps her hand just in time, pulling her in the opposite direction she’s heading, chests now near-flush against one another.

\- Babe, come on, I only got eyes for you – 

\- Well, duh. It’s your imagination that’s the problem – 

\- Oh, you have _no idea_ what I’m thinking about right now –

Quynh’s upset façade is unceremoniously dropped like a plate, smashing across the floor with a deeply satisfying crack.

Her eyebrow raises, questioning and intrigued. Enticingly so.

\- What _is_ going through that precious little head of yours, I wonder? –

Andy’s hand ghosts across Quynh’s lower back as a reply.

She then pulls her in closer, the feeling of bare skin making contact sending an excruciatingly pleasant shiver across their bodies. All kinds of warm. All kinds of intoxicating.

\- I’ve always been more of a show-and-tell kind of woman – 

Quynh’s arms wrap around Andy’s muscular shoulders. 

Quynh leans in. Agonizingly close, lips mere inches away from its destination. The grin on her lips give away just how intentional the proximity is.

\- You’re taking your sweet-old-time putting your money where your mouth’s at – 

Andy’s gaze reaches the point of ignition, Quynh’s chest becoming a raging fire in return.

\- You asked for it – 

Quynh closes the gap.

Andy leans into Quynh’s body, forcing her to lean back towards the bed.

Andy’s hands reach down to Quynh’s thighs. With a strong sweep, she lifts Quynh off from the bed, Quynh’s legs wrapping themselves around Andy’s lower back in a swift motion.

It’s second nature at this point. Instinct. Auto-pilot response.

The best kind.

Andy’s hands carry and press Quynh’s body impossibly closer to her own. 

Quynh’s hand twirls its way through Andy’s sleek, autumn-like hair; her right arm locked around her shoulder, in an effort to keep their lips and heat in close proximity.

The angle of the kiss is nothing short of perfect, the depth with which it sets her heart and soul ablaze all but life-altering.

They both turn breathless as their touch grows in desperation, the pleasure as thorough as it is exquisite.

Anticipation is the name of the game now. Clothes feel to constrictive to remain in place.

_This just got a hell of a lot more interesting._

° ° °

_9:40 a.m._

\- So, he never fooled around with anyone then? – 

_Someone's taking that chaste until marriage ideology at heart. No wonder he's so uptight_

\- Nah. After that fiasco he just gave up on women overall. Not that he was ever really into us anyway, but yeah. I’m not a fan of that, uh... – 

Quynh muses on it for a second before arriving with a rather accurate assessment of the woman in question.

\- Cunt – 

\- Ouch – 

\- What? She sounds like it – Andy, unable to find a way to defend her, nods in agreement - Wish he’d brought those flowers to me instead. I wouldn’t have been such a bitch about it –

\- Assholes can bring you flowers too – 

\- Been there, done that. Didn’t go well for the guy. Point is, she had no right to say shit like that, simply because he was “such a bore”. She wanted to get laid? Fine. Just don’t be such a bad sport about it. Not all men are assholes – 

\- Right. Going to need sources on that one, babe – 

\- There’s Nico… and Joe, of course – 

\- Uh huh. Go on -

\- Well, I can’t think of any other examples _right now_ , but come on... I mean, there’s bound to be at least… one more, right? - 

_Help me out here, guys._

\- Yeah. Not to my experience – 

\- To be fair, men are… weird. Like, it’s just feelings, _bro_. They’re not going to chop your balls off –

\- And what’s up with them wearing clothes so tight? Just… grab a larger size? –

\- Or become a stripper and stop wasting our time, _dude_ – 

\- Yeah. And God forbid someone so much as dares to stare at _them_ – 

\- Funny how sensitive they can turn out to be – 

\- It’s almost like getting stared at isn’t enjoyable at all – 

Quynh snorts.

\- How weird – 

Laughter echoes through the room, the casualness of their position making Andy’s heart beat in a rather tempered pace she’s still getting used to.

\- Shame those two dumbasses haven’t gotten around to patching things up – 

\- You know, it started off as amusing, but man. They’re really stretching this out –

Andy rolls her eyes as the time frame they’re dealing with becomes apparent.

_6\. Fucking. Months._

_Our first fight lasted a week. Next up, BAM. Fucking._

\- They’re hopeless – 

\- I hear you. They deserve better – 

The scent of coffee lingers on, the temperature increasing with each passing hour. The noise down below is rather tame, remnants of New Year’s hangover clearly at play, but it’s background noise that adds to the charm regardless.

All in all, not a bad place to have a proper vacation in, once the time is right.

_Retirement can’t come soon enough._

\- Who do you think will cave in first? – 

Andy’s question seems easy enough on the surface. Once Quynh reflects on it, not so much.

_They are dumb as rocks, those two._

\- _Oof_. Brutal – 

\- My money’s on Nico – 

\- _Really?_ –

\- Heart up his sleeve, remember? –

\- Well, sure. It’s like, his defining trait – _He’s kind of like a squirrel. A large one. Less hairy too_ \- But Joe seems so… romantic, in an old-fashioned, really cool kind of way? Like, tempted to go straight to find out just how much. The flower and poetry bits alone are _killer_ in my book – 

\- Nico’s got humor though –

\- Yeah. Lots and lots and _lots_ of it. And he’s so sentimental. My patience only goes so far –

\- So, if it wasn’t for _my_ good looks, I take it you’d be all over Joe then? - 

\- Amongst other things – Her grin receives a squeeze in her thigh as a reply – But, hypothetically… yes. I’d be all over the guy – 

\- Pft – 

\- Girl's gotta eat, doll. Besides, like you wouldn’t do the exact same, if I wasn’t in the picture – 

\- Ok, first of all: _Gross_ – Quynh giggles, shoving Andy’s shoulder with her foot, previously resting on the frame of the bed. Andy’s back gently collides with it, a thud as it smacks against the wall – Second of all, looks fade. I’d take an “ugly” guy who can crack me up over a gorgeous prick, any day of the week – 

\- Unless you just want to get laid – 

Andy concedes with a nod of her coffee cup, now warming up her hand.

\- Unless I just want to get laid. If that’s the case I know what kind of guy to call. And fake an orgasm with, most likely –

\- How many times have you… – 

\- **Ugh**. _Too_ fucking many – 

She places the cup back on the bedside table.

\- What's up with that? Why are they always in such a goddamn rush? – 

\- _I know_. Just… use your hands, dude. Explore. Get creative. Live a little –

Quynh motions Andy to pass over her cup.

\- Like, not everything is about you, dumbass. I’m right here! – 

Laughter once again dances across the room. The coffee machine finishes prepping the second round, a series of beeps beckoning Quynh to jump out of bed before Andy does.

Quynh takes a sip from the wrong cup as she heads towards the kitchen. She winces at the spoiled taste of coffee, mixed with an obscene amount of sugar and cream that makes it a smoothie, to her eyes. Or taste buds, rather. 

She takes another sip, once the shock has passed.

_You get used to it._

She drops back down on the bed, one hand resting behind her head and the other one keeping her coffee cup balanced on her navel. She stares at the ceiling, reminiscing, legs once again dangling and gently tapping on the melon-colored wall.

\- So, Nico then? –

\- Yeah. Got too much history with Joe. Too awkward - 

\- Same goes for me and Nico, to be fair – Memories of him in his early twenties squeeze a chuckle out of her. She can’t help but shudder as well - But I gotta say, he can be a handful at times – Andy snorts, taking a sip from Quynh’s cup, her pained expression making it seem like she fished her coffee straight from the toilet – Oh, he had his moments, doll. Went through a hippie phase back in college – Andy’s expression twists, a la “you’re pulling my leg” – I wish I was kidding. Went all-in terms of facial hair – 

\- Really? – 

\- He stopped using deodorant too – 

She gags.

\- Men are gross – 

\- Amen – The cups clink as they tap one against the other - And hey, he’s not opposed to smoking pot –

\- Joe got high - Quynh raises her brow - Once - 

\- Gee, what a stoner. A lost case, that one –

\- I’m assuming you’ve got a lifetime supply, stashed on a safe house? – 

\- Totally. Mom’s crazy about it – 

\- Man, I love that woman – 

\- Feelings mutual, doll. Which reminds me. She actually does want to take you up on that margarita contest – 

\- Bullshit – 

\- You wish. You’re fucked, by the way. No way you can outdrink her – 

\- Pft – 

\- Well, she can outdrink me. And she could outdrink all those phony spring breakers – She nods towards the window, music incorporating itself in the background noise, coming from the pool area - in a 90-mile radius with one hand – 

\- What’d she be doing with the other hand? – 

Quynh’s cheeky expression makes Andy brace herself for impact.

\- Carrying your hammered ass up to the room – 

They both snap. Loudly. The hilarity in the room soon becomes palpable enough for the air to feel insufficient.

It’s a heartwarming, melodic mess.

Minutes pass, the lightheartedness lingering in the air, much like Quynh’s lavender perfume and Andy’s sugar-infested impostor, trying to pass as coffee.

\- Ok, now I _really_ want to know – 

Andy pulls the cup up to her lips, eyebrow raising as her lip curves upwards.

_This should be interesting._

\- Scale of 1 to 10, how good do you think Joe is in… _you know_ \- 

_Oh my **God** , Quynh._

Jealousy builds up in pressure, to the point she wonders if smoke’s coming out of her ears. 

She struggles to keep her posture as nonchalant as humanly possible. The last thing Quynh needs right now is acknowledgement that her teasing remarks are getting under her skin.

\- I’ll answer that if you ever get around to doing the same with Nico - 

\- Oh, he’s a 9. Easy – 

_Hold up._

\- You… answered that _way_ too fast for my liking – 

\- Well, we, uh… _you know_ – 

\- You’re joking – 

\- We were in college. He was in denial. I was horny. We were both ok with it. And kinda hammered, too – 

\- Shit, babe – She muses on it for a second - He must have been _real_ bad if you started swinging for the opposite team afterwards –

\- I’ve always been rather open-minded. But no, doll. He was **far** from bad in that regard – 

\- Good to know – 

\- Very thorough –

_Stop smirking, you gorgeous bitch._

\- Anything else? – 

\- He’s very gentle for the most part, and he knows how to take things slow, thank the Lord... but his hands are just… - Quynh delves deeper into the bed, squirming and closing her eyes in a rather dramatic (and obnoxious) way – **oof**. Every man on the surface of the Earth should take notes from that encounter –

\- You done? – 

\- Joe’s a lucky fella – 

\- Fuck, Quynh - 

\- Calm down. We’re talking, what? 10 years now? He’s history, doll. I only got eyes for you now – 

\- And Joe – 

\- You’re never going to let that go, are you? – 

\- I will if you finish packing – 

\- Never it is – 

Andy snorts, jealousy fading as gently as the sun, creeping its way to its midday position.

Quynh throws a wrapped pair of socks at her face, across the room. The urge to smash a pillow on her evaporates once she realizes that the socks are wrapped. Quynh smirks, all kinds of proud with herself.

They settle on a playful, lazy routine. Quynh throws. Andy folds and places in the bag, in a position she deems worthy. 

_Whatever. It’s better than doing it all by myself._

Quynh glances at the clock, surprise easing a huff out of her. 

\- When’s the last time your boy slept this much? –

The domestic bubble they were in is popped, dropping Andy back on the bed with a pop.

_Huh?_

\- You mean Fowler? – 

Quynh snorts.

\- Not _that_ boy. I meant the dumb one – 

Andy shakes her dog out from her thoughts, realizing just how loaded the question is, once she realizes that she means…

\- Oh, right – 

_It’s been too damn long._

\- He usually clocks at around… four hours? Sometimes five. Spaced out though - 

\- Phew. Is that why he’s always so moody – 

\- Amongst other things. He never was much of a talker to begin with… – 

\- Understatement of the year – 

\- … and he’s always got something on his mind – 

\- So, it’s a smoothie of contributing factors, then – 

\- Pretty much – 

\- Is he happy though? – 

The silence that follows makes Quynh shift uncomfortably. 

_Fuck._

\- He’s, uh… functional –

\- Yikes – 

\- It’s complicated – 

\- Sounds like it –

They remain quiet, the incongruously warm winter breeze sneaking into their room, caressing their near-bare skin in the process. 

\- He keeps to himself, for the most part - _Writing, guitar, coffee, assignment. Repeat_ – Let’s just say he’s not opposed to a routine – 

\- So, he’s you. Plus a pennis – 

_Who said romance is dead?_

\- That’s sweet – 

\- Well, you won’t let me read his poetry, and he sure as hell won’t play a song for me anytime soon. I gotta get creative when trying to decipher what his deal is – 

\- He's a tortured artist, in a nutshell. I believe his exact words were “over my dead, rotting corpse”, that one time I got around to asking him to play me that song he was composing? –

\- Charming – 

\- Reserved is the term he prefers – 

\- No wonder he and Nico are taking so long to get over the pining phase – 

Andy stretches, hands reaching up to the ceiling. Quynh glances at her stomach, a fond (and dorky) smile spreading across her cheeks as Andy’s workout routine grows visible.

\- I still can’t believe Joe just… ran off – 

\- Well… commitment _can_ be scary – 

\- So are spiders, but when you see one you don’t run out of the house and come back 3 hours later to _maybe_ kill it – 

\- Brutal analogy. But… strangely accurate– 

\- 6 months, Andy – 

\- Ok, that’s fair. But still. Such a dick – 

\- Oh, give me a break. You love it – 

\- That is also fair. But still. Dick – 

Bags are all but done for. Flight ain’t until 4:15. And based on Joe’s expression, me very well may end up sleeping until past lunch time. 

\- Do you think we should… I don’t know, intervene? – 

\- Uh – 

\- We could keep on playing dumb until the summer, but come on, where’s the fun in that? – 

\- One thing is betting on who’s making a move first, but meddling is… I don’t know babe. What if we fuck things up even more? – 

\- We’re not men, doll. We are the ones who _fix_ up the mess –

\- Heh – 

_It’s risky. But… we don’t have to be too obvious about it._

_We can be subtle, right?_

\- I guess we could… _nudge_ them – 

\- That’s my girl – 

\- I said nudge, Quynh – 

\- Boring – 

\- Smart – 

\- Fine. Nudge. Whatever –

\- Where _do_ we start though? –

They grow quiet, unsure how to proceed now that they’ve agreed on lighting the braziers of romance.

_Men are too fucking complicated._

_And stupid._

_We should just shove them all into a rocket and fly them straight to…_

_Oh._

_**Oh!** _

\- Ok, I think I’ve got something – 

Andy’s surprise is as genuine as it is amusing.

\- That was… fast? – 

\- Your future wife is a genius, doll. You better start getting used to it – 

Andy laughs. It fades once realization hits. 

_Oh._

Quynh’s thoughts turn hectic.

_Shit._

\- I think I might be able to live with that, actually – 

Quynh’s smile dazzles Andy in all the right ways, the warmth in her chest growing exponentially once she notices the faint blush in her cheeks and the spark in her eyes.

Quynh’s train of thought shows no sign of stopping, now that it has left the station, struggling to keep track of both objectives simultaneously.

_First things first. We need to sort out the flight shenanigans, pronto._

_And, I should start research on the side as well._

_Ring like the one I have in mind can’t come cheap._

_Worth it though._

_Every penny._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next up is some more Joe and Nicky heart-to-heart, fluffy AF shenanigans!
> 
> Taking the gang west-bound, most likely visiting Asia? I have some more heist action in mind, but I'm still sorting out what's what. Prison break perhaps? Dividing the team in two? Who knows? Stay tuned!
> 
> I'm giving the gang a small vacation though. That means slow-dancing, piña colada-time, more sunny beaches and finally meeting Nile! And Fowler. Joe is a dog person you see.
> 
> Be sure to share some love down below, don't be shy! I'd love to know what you guys/gals/NB pals think of the story so far. I'm pretty head over heels for it, but I also want to know how you feel about it. Stay safe and take care. Have an awesome week!


	9. A Nice Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _1:09 p.m._
> 
> When Joe walks into the room, his bed hair makes Quynh’s grin to grow tenfold.
> 
> \- Morning, Joe– 
> 
> \- The position of the sun says otherwise – 
> 
> \- Your _hair_ says otherwise, handsome – 
> 
> He rolls his eyes, good-naturedly. He reaches for the coffee jug, only to find it empty.
> 
> \- Did you have to drink _all_ of it? – 
> 
> \- That was a 2-person job. And hey, privileges of being a morning person – 
> 
> He sighs. Quynh stands, dancing her way across the room barefoot. 
> 
> She looks like a ballerina, sun-lit skin and lavender inundating Joe’s senses when she reaches him.
> 
> \- Here – 
> 
> He takes her cup in his hands, smell of coffee further shaking off the stupor.
> 
> \- Is this yours or Andy’s? – 
> 
> She shrugs smugly, making Joe crack a smile. He hides it behind the cup.
> 
> \- Fortune favors the bold –

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm looking forward to all the action setpieces I've come up with for this fic, but we still got one more chapter of downtime until we reach that point. 
> 
> I'm determined to get the gang slow-dancing and having a well-earned break before the action kicks into gear. 
> 
> Just roll with it. This chapter is actually my favorite so far. Hopefully it'll be yours as well! Hope you have a good time reading it!

## A Nice Night

_1:09 p.m._

When Joe walks into the room, his bed hair makes Quynh’s grin to grow tenfold.

\- Morning, Joe– 

\- The position of the sun says otherwise – 

\- Your _hair_ says otherwise, handsome – 

He rolls his eyes, good-naturedly. He reaches for the coffee jug, only to find it empty.

\- Did you have to drink _all_ of it? – 

\- That was a 2-person job. And hey, privileges of being a morning person – 

He sighs. Quynh stands, dancing her way across the room barefoot. 

She looks like a ballerina, sun-lit skin and lavender inundating Joe’s senses when she reaches him.

\- Here – 

He takes her cup in his hands, smell of coffee further shaking off the stupor.

\- Is this yours or Andy’s? – 

She shrugs smugly, making Joe crack a smile. He hides it behind the cup.

\- Fortune favors the bold – 

He glares at her, sleep making the gesture lose its bite.

He takes a sip, finding himself unable to dissimulate the comfort it brings to drink _actual_ coffee.

\- You could have just said it was yours – 

She beams at him. 

\- You’re no fun – 

He takes another sip.

\- I take it you're gracing us with your presence in Puako – 

\- Correct, as usual – 

\- As long as you’re in charge of the coffee, we’ll be just fine – 

The silence is… different. Not exactly comfortable just yet, but familiar, regardless. 

\- Something on your mind, Johnny? – 

\- Heh – 

\- Not a fan of nicknames? – 

\- I’m not used to them – He looks at her and decides to cut her some slack. She’s family now. And if Andy is so head over heels for her, there must be a reason. Or several – But as far as nicknames go… I guess I could do worse – 

\- You could. I’m rather tame compared to how creative Nico gets in that regard – 

Their eyes meet. 

She seems relaxed. Curious. Open.

Unjudging.

Might as well get it out in the open now, before she feels the need to have _the talk_ with him.

\- I really like him – 

Her smile is vaguely teasing, but she remains neutral for the most part.

\- The feeling’s mutual, based on what I’ve seen – 

Her gaze turns evaluating. Measuring. The teasing is now extinct.

\- He’s been through a lot, Joe –

_I have my share of blame to carry._

\- And I get the feeling that so have you – 

He holds her gaze, hoping his agreement with the statement can remain wordless on his end.

Her hand hesitates, as she debates whether to cross the invisible, unspoken barrier between the two.

He smiles, gently, just enough to give her green light to do so.

When her hand grazes his cheek, the warmth in it makes him lean into the touch.

If he closes his eyes, he could easily mistake the touch for Andy’s.

Her eyes grow tender, apologetic, to an extent.

\- I’m sorry, Joe – 

They don’t need to further elaborate or dwell on it. 

He takes in the tenderness in full, losing himself in the comfort implied in it.

\- I thought we settled on _Johnny_ – 

And just like that, the bond within the two crosses the threshold. He's not sure what's on the other side, but he's optimistic.

Her laughter is echoed by him with a chuckle.

\- I can see why she’s crazy about you – 

\- I knew you’d come around – 

\- Don’t push your luck, _Queen_ – 

\- You better finish up packing, Johnny. _We_ roll in 20 –

The emphasis in we makes his eyes turn questioning.

He reassures himself by taking another sip from her cup.

_Caffeine still hasn’t kicked in._

_What else could she mean by that?_

° ° °

_January 1st, 2020 - Midnight_

_Flight 0451 – Somewhere over the North Pacific Ocean_

_ETA to Daniel K. Inouye International Airport: 9 ½ hours_

_As soon as we land, I’m going to murder you._

Quynh sinks herself in the book from across the aisle, pushing her glasses upwards, and a knowing grin, cautiously and near-perfectly concealed.

Andy’s fast asleep on her shoulder, not a care in the world, sleeping the same way a toddler would. 

She nods at him almost imperceptibly, encouraging and smug. 

He swallows his envy and annoyance, and focuses back on Nico.

\- You seem tense – 

Nico breathes, smile breaking his neutral expression, currently masking the internal screaming in his head.

\- Me? _Pft_. Never – 

\- All that finger and feet-tapping are somewhat telling – 

_Fuck you._

\- Would you believe me if I told you I’m claustrophobic? – 

\- You weren’t back in that maintenance closet in Vienna – 

\- The UN freaking headquarters, Yusuf. And, also, that’s only one… – 

\- The sewers in Lisbon didn’t bother you either – 

\- I could have been having a panic attack, for all you care. Which is seemingly not a lot, by the way – 

\- Were you? – 

\- Uh, caring? – 

\- Having a panic attack? – 

He glares. 

Joe shakes his head, bemused.

\- You’re kind of missing the point here –

Joe closes his book, rewarding him with wide eyes and his full attention.

_Sure. That helps._

\- Do enlighten me, by all means – 

Finding himself at a loss for words is a rare occurrence. Or it used to be, at least.

Clearly not anymore. 

\- Hmn – 

\- You _are_ tense – 

_Why is this so hard?_

_I was an asshole in my past life. I ran over a dog with my bike or pushed an old lady down an elevator shaft. There’s no other explanation._

_This is too hard._

\- I’m… conflicted – 

\- How come? – 

\- Gee, wouldn’t you like to know? – 

\- I would, actually - 

He really can’t understand Joe sometimes. It’s like he’s talking to an entirely different person all the sudden, and he didn’t even get a memo to mentally (or emotionally) prepare himself for it. 

Joe’s book motions upwards and back down to his lap, as he debates how to proceed.

\- Listen. I’m not trying to give you a hard time – 

\- Oh, I’m sorry. I got distracted by the pig that just flew by – 

Joe’s sense of humor is determined to stay on a roll.

\- What color was it? –

_How am I supposed to follow that up?_

\- _What is up with you?_ – 

\- **That’s** … - Joe’s eyes do a poor job at masking his frustration - what I’ve been trying to ask _you_ for the past 5 minutes! –

\- People are sleeping, Joe. Calm down – 

\- _Are you fucking_ …? - He rubs his eyes, muttering something in what is most definitely not a language Nico’s familiar with – Why are you acting so… - _This is going **great**_ \- You’ve been acting in the most bizarre way, ever since we sat down. Is something wrong? –

\- Well…for one thing, I was not expecting to be seated next to you for the next – He brings his wristwatch to his line of sight, feeling like a dumbass once he realizes that he doesn’t actually own one – 9 and half hours – 

\- Which is… a bad thing, I’m assuming? – 

\- _What?_ No. What’s the matter with you? – 

\- Wow – He huffs, equal parts perplexed and amused – So, you’re tense because... we’re going to be sitting next to one another for the next 9 and a half hours. Which is not a bad thing, even though your attitude makes it seem like it definitely is – 

\- That’s,uh... a big leap – 

His hands move frantically, his mind helplessly lost in the process of untangling the captivating mess that is Nicholas.

He then breathes. Deeply. 

It seems to be a Yusuf ritual of some sort. It ain’t the first time he’s done it, and most likely far from the last.

_I should keep a logbook. How many times can I make him do his breathing ritual in 10 hours, I wonder?_

\- I figured you wouldn’t be nervous around me, after our little make-out session – 

Nico turns away, bashful smile making Joe’s satisfaction kick into gear.

\- Have you seen _you_? – 

\- I’m not blind, Nico – Joe’s knee is playfully shoved away by Nico’s - But… I guess it’s nice to know the effect I have on people – 

\- Don’t let it go to your head – 

\- You got all the humor, darling – Nico purses his lips, sinking deeper into his seat due to the embarrassment and monumentally struggling not to giggle - I need to have something – 

\- You have me, _hon_. You could do worse – 

Joe's smugness is as mesmerizing as it is infuriating.

\- That’s a big leap –

_Oh, you smug, funny bastard._

_You think you can beat me at my own game?_

_Fat chance._

\- Our wedding just got postponed to the next decade, by the way – 

He holds Joe’s gaze firmly, remarkably unflinching.

Unknown to Joe, he means every word. 

_The sight of him in his forties will surely make me faint on the spot. ___

____

\- You’re _real_ lucky you’re… - 

____

____

The blush on Joe’s cheeks nudges a juvenile grin up to Nico’s lips.

____

_He’s so endearing I want to climb on his lap and kiss him senseless._

____

\- What’s that? You cut yourself short there – 

____

\- You’re infuriating – 

____

\- No, that wasn’t it –

____

____

_Oh, how the tables have turned._

____

\- I’m going to be reading for the next 9 hours, just so you know - 

____

\- What _are_ you reading? – 

____

\- Wouldn’t you… hey! –

____

Nico stretches the book over the aisle, struggling to decipher the title while Joe begins a tickling assault on his ribs. 

____

\- This is the _last_ time I sit next to you on a plane. Ever – 

____

\- 23… - _Huh. That’s it?_ \- Phew. That’s a mouthful - 

____

\- What are you, 10? – 

____

He responds Joe’s deadpan by putting the book in his hand.

____

\- Calm down, grandpa – 

____

\- _Ugh_ –

____

\- Just messing with you – 

____

\- Yeah – He turns to Nico, wearing his smugness like a top hat - And you weren’t the slightest bit subtle about it, either – 

____

\- Oh! Ha-hah! – 

____

The air manages to remain light-hearted, once the amusement starts to fade.

____

Nico’s desire to fall back on his fidgeting compels him to voice out one of his concerns. One of many.

____

\- Hey. I’m sorry for… you know, being so… -

____

\- What? Tense? – 

____

____

\- Obnoxious – 

____

Joe’s hand lands on his neck, thumb caressing the sensitive skin underneath, and sending a soothing spark from its contact point, all the way down to his toes. 

____

\- I’ll be the first to admit you’re a handful – 

____

_This better be good_

____

\- But I consider it a privilege to put up with it – 

____

\- Aww, that’s sweet – _It is, right?_ \- I think – 

____

\- I meant it in a sweet way – 

____

\- Well, I happen to like my coffee with a fuck-ton sugar. So, you know, next time don’t be afraid to turn things up a notch in that department – 

____

\- Shoot. I don’t have any flowers lying around – 

____

\- You better get creative, then –

____

Joe waves the volume in his hand around, proudly.

____

____

\- That’s what poetry is for, _darling_ –

____

\- Oh, that’s cheating. Not to mention lazy – 

____

____

\- Hey, if I have an arsenal at my disposal, I fully intent to use it -

____

Joe’s voice deepens, the promise of a roar. It makes the nerves boiling within Nico to take a U-turn, and hurry along in the opposite direction.

____

As far as a change of pace goes, this is a pleasant one in his book.

____

\- Still. Would it kill you to put in the leg-work yourself? Rather than relying on – Nico places a finger on the cover, pushing it down in an effort to read the name up at the top – _Sebastian… Seins?_ \- 

____

\- It’s _Sebastián_. And it’s pronounced _Sáenz_ –

____

\- _Saints_ – 

____

\- _**Sáenz**_ – 

____

\- _Sa_ … I give up – 

____

\- And I’m the lazy one? – 

____

\- Heh – 

____

Joe shakes his head, charismatically.

____

Nico’s mind races, pieces of the puzzle that is Joe slowly but surely falling into place.

____

\- I can see you being into poetry – 

____

\- Well, you are literally watching me read some – 

____

\- I never really got the appeal – 

____

\- It’s… - _How can I even get around to describing it?_ – an acquired taste, I suppose – _What would he say if I showed him some of my own?_ – Took me a couple years to stop being afraid of it and giving it a shot. Haven’t looked back ever since – He eyes the one he was reading before their conversation started – I just… find some comfort in it. Knowing someone a hundred years prior managed to describe the way I feel right now so accurately – It’s like having a friend you’ve never met – It’s odd, but I find it… it’s nice – 

____

He turns, only to find Nico’s emerald eyes on him, watching intently. 

____

He tells himself that he’s captivated, rather than mocking. 

____

His own cheeks don’t hesitate in giving him a hard time, making him feel like its the latter. 

____

\- What? – 

____

\- It’s just… nice. Seeing this side of you for the first time. You look... happy – 

____

\- Shut up – 

____

\- Mind to take a compliment, hon – 

____

He hesitates at the sincerity in Nico’s voice.

____

He could write a thousand pages on how beautiful he is, and they’d merely scratch the surface. 

____

\- Would you… - _Not yet_ – you want me to read you one? –

__Nico looks down to the book in his hands, hesitant._ _

____

\- What if, uh… I don’t, you know, _get it?_ – 

____

Joe’s smile is charming, his eyes patient and kind.

____

_I really want to kiss you right now._

____

\- I think part of the fun of this whole poetry thing is acting like you _get it_ –

____

Nico shifts in his seat, positioning himself so he can more comfortably take in the breathtaking view that is Joe.

____

\- Alright then. Hit me with your best shot – 

____

_Well, fuck_

____

\- Right – 

____

\- Didn’t think I’d say yes? – 

____

\- I forgot I’m going to have to translate – 

____

\- Well, we do have a handful of hours to kill. No reason to rush – 

____

Joe sighs, warming up to the idea.

____

_I just have to choose the right one. Which is easier said than done._

____

He flips the pages, frustrated at the number of colored bookmarks, mockingly sticking out from the pages. 

____

_I should go digital. How the fuck am I supposed to remember the best ones with **these**?_

____

His memory come to his aid, the sense of comfort and belonging he felt back in his twenties guiding his fingers back to the first handful of pages after the biography.

____

_I wish I’d been able to write this well when I was 22. How’d this fucker do it?_

____

It’s titled _Honey and Ambrosia._

____

____

_Fitting._

____

\- Right – 

____

He clears his throat, eyeing Nico through the corner of his eyes. 

____

Nico leans further down in his seat and rests his head on his shoulder. His hand hesitates in the armrest as his fingers brush his own.

____

He takes the reigns, intertwining his hand with Nico’s. The touch is gentle and cautious at first. It soon grows tight. He can’t imagine himself being the first one to let go.

____

The knot in his throat suddenly unravels, effortlessly.

____

He breathes him in, closing his eyes for a second, and allowing himself the joy of drowning in the sweet cacophony of emotions striking him all at once. 

____

The warmth of the touch; the exhilarating scent; the sweet, sweet promise of Nico’s lips, so unbearably close to his own; the comfort of having Nico’s body in contact with his own, after having spent so long dreaming about it. 

____

He’ll have to settle for trying to translate his feelings for him through someone else’s words, for now.

____

He’ll share his own work sooner, rather than later.

  


_Your lips are a dream_

  


_Summer’s touch, singing nightingale_

_Ocean eyes, fleeting and innocent breeze_

_July smile, contraband heat_

_Caressing danzón, lips like sun_

  


_Your eyes inundate the soul,_

_Awaken passion_

_Moon-like glow, mystery of honey and coffee_

  


_Involuntary blush, March’s promise_

_Awkward charm, saint-like embrace_

_I dream of your eyes, your skin, your fire_

  


_Burns like inferno, bonfire innocence_

_Flower kiss, rainbow and unyielding_

_You dazzle, glisten and daze_

  


_Mermaid’s song, voice intoxicating and profound_

_Midnight sun, winter’s howl_

_Distance that murders, sleepless rest_

  


_Ardent heart, soul in half_

_Searching, searching, searching_

  


_Your light beckons_

_Desperation, desire and butterfly symphony_

_I see you crossing the street_

_And you see me_

  


_Gathering gazes, sincere eyes_

_Reaching for the Sun, August’s twilight_

_Unforgettable touch no longer unknown_

  


_Sweet-as-honey chord_

_Milk coffee and hesitation_

_Contagious amusement, clandestine hands_

  


_Run before I catch you_

_I never let you go_

  


_Run because you chase me_

_Neither can you me_

  


It’s dated August 25th. 1989. It was a Friday, apparently.

The silence that follows feels like a vacuum, only this time, there’s a feeling of familiarity that takes his breath away. 

____

It’s a heartache worth enduring.

____

He suddenly pictures himself feeling this exact way, on a night similar to this one. A warm bed and an open window. Saline air and palm trees, clashing and whistling in the background. The scent is familiar. The feeling just like home.

____

He keeps looking back on that night, and his love for Nico only blossoms even further.

____

It’s evergreen; lacking any sense of restraint. It’s unapologetic and true.

____

He’s just like the Sun. A gravitational pull so strong it, never ceases to shock him to his very core. Gravity. A blue sky. Something so real and unquestionable it feels like a puzzle, each piece falling into place. 

____

It just makes sense.

____

\- That was… _something_ – 

____

He eyes Nico, and sees a tear sliding across his cheek. His finger brushes it away, lingering and reassuring.

____

\- I take it you liked it? – 

____

\- Shut up – 

____

\- Hey, if you’re going to be like that, I won’t read you mine – 

____

\- Wait. What? – 

____

\- I mean, I can’t promise they’re _this_ good… - 

____

\- Are you kidding me? That would be… - He struggles to imagine how much of a wreck it’d make him to read something Joe wrote, picturing it being written just for him – Would you? Share your poetry with me? – 

____

\- I can’t promise it’s going to be… -

____

\- Joe – His tone is commanding. The kind that makes Joe gulp and listen intently, helpless to do anything but marvel at how strong and confident Nico sounds when he speaks that way – It’s going to be phenomenal. And if you trust me enough to share it, I’ll be sure to praise it to heaven, hell and back – 

____

He loses himself in Nico’s encouraging smile, determination to dazzle him with his talent suddenly becoming a raging fire. 

____

_You’re in for the ride of your life, my love._

____

\- I guess I better get off my ass and start writing then – 

____

\- You… you mean right now? – 

____

\- What? No, I… - He’s tempted to do just that. Give Nico something tangible. Something that tries (and fails) to capture all of his beauty and charm, and reaches out for his heart and soul, same way Nico has so effortlessly stolen his own for the longest time – Right now, I just want to have you by my side and… forget about the world, for a little while – 

____

The tenderness in Nico’s eyes is all he’s ever wanted and needed, without knowing it.

____

For now, he doesn’t give a damn what the world does, says or has to say about it.

____

He just wants him.

____

He’s all set.

____

Nico leans in, hand as gentle as a breeze, warmth as strong as a fire.

____

He pulls him in, and he’s helpless to do anything but fall in his embrace.

____

His lips are the promise of heaven he’s never felt worthy of until now. It’s gentle, cautious and ravaging all at once, somehow. A chaotic gift, breaking his heart and putting it back together on the spot, in the most delightful way imaginable.

____

Their tongues greet one another, the pleasure raising the skin on the back of his neck and all across his arms.

____

He’s bewitched, mystified and hopelessly devoted to Nico's touch, heart all but belonging to him at this point.

____

It’s joy, in its most dramatic, overtly sentimental and genuine form. 

____

It’s being brought to paradise itself, over and over and over again.

____

He’s alive.

____

____

° ° °

____

____

_January 2nd, 2020 – 2:05 a.m._

____

\- You did _not_ – 

____

\- I was technically an adult at the time, so yeah. Didn’t have much of a choice – 

____

\- And what was it like? – 

____

____

\- It was… terrifying, actually – 

____

\- No shit – 

____

\- I mean, the officer was actually kind of nice. I think he could tell how stupid I was feeling and he cut me some slack – 

____

\- Still. It sounds awful – 

____

\- I didn’t sleep until my papa picked me up and took me home the following day – 

____

\- You spent the night there too? **Fuck** , Joe – 

____

\- The toilet was… just lying there in the middle of the cell. And some of the guys were literally snoring? I couldn’t fucking believe it. Who the fuck could possibly dare to sleep in there? –

____

\- Those guys, clearly – 

____

\- There was this one guy... he was so fucking drunk it was embarrassing – 

____

Nico raises an eyebrow. 

____

He slaps his elbow, not feeling the slightest bit sorry about it.

____

\- _Ow_? –

____

\- I felt like the most colossal imbecile on the **planet** , and I get _that_ look as reward for sharing it? –

____

Nico howls with laughter, covering his mouth once he remembers where they are. 

____

\- Are you fucking _kidding me_? – 

____

\- You’re fucking laughing too, dumbass! – 

____

\- Whatever happened to honey? – 

____

\- I left it back in Houston, smartass – 

____

\- Next up you’ll be calling me a bitch, and claiming it’s a term of endearment – 

____

\- Shut up. _Bitch_ – 

____

Joe fails to hold back the laughter bursting from his lips, deep from his chest, the symphony of the gods to Nico’s ears. 

____

_I could hear him laugh for an eternity and still blush every damn time._

____

\- Ok, my turn – 

____

\- Play nice – 

____

\- What was your first kiss like? – 

____

\- That’s elementary school-kind of nice, honey – 

____

\- Fine. What was your first blowjob like? – 

____

\- Fuck you – 

____

\- That bad? – 

____

_Fuck you a thousand times._

____

\- It was… really nice, just so you know –

____

\- The blowjob or the kiss? -

____

\- I’ll let you do the guess-work – 

____

Joe shoves him, red cheeks and tight smile in place.

____

\- For your information – He hesitates. He drops the act and decides to be sincere, rather than teasing – He was a really sweet guy, and he, uh… - _Oh, Charlie. It was never meant to be_ – He was they kind of guy you fall for hard and just… never really forget – Joe’s understanding is implied in his silence, and the way his thumb caresses his hand. _Heartbreak comes easy for folks like us_ – I still find myself wondering whatever happened to him after we parted ways – 

____

He had scars, dreams and a personality that often shined through his reserved demeanor. 

____

Oh, how he longed to kiss those lips and ease the pain in his eyes. Be a rock-solid shoulder for him to cry on. 

____

_I hope you’re doing ok, wherever you are._

____

\- He left school before I could make a move – 

____

He liked ballet, musicals and he was a beautiful contradiction. Built like an ox, and yet, as gentle and playful as a butterfly, once he let his guard down and allowed you to see that. 

____

His eyes can’t hold a candle to Joe’s, but they were undoubtedly captivating in their own way. 

____

He often struggled not to stare at them too deeply or overtly. At least not enough to give something away.

____

\- And get this, one day he dropped by to pick up his brother, and I just… panicked – He can laugh about it now, after all these years. For the longest time he felt like a hopeless idiot about it – He’d already left the year prior, but when he waved at me that day he seemed… so different, somehow? Happy though. I just… froze and kept walking. You have no idea how much I wanted to burst into tears when I looked back on it – 

____

\- High school crushes are the worst fucking thing ever – 

____

\- The high school experience overall isn’t far behind – 

____

\- I hear you. It… had its moments, but I hated a great deal of it – 

____

\- Lots and lots of assholes in yours too? – 

____

\- I… I happened to be one of those, so yeah – Nico sighs, struggling to picture Joe as some twisted, mean-spirited version of the man he is now - Wasn’t a fan of the overall experience once I realized how much I contributed to it being so shitty – 

____

_We should just abolish that god-fucking place and be done with it._

____

\- Anything you regret in particular? – 

____

Joe eyes him, lip quivering, only for it to be hidden by his teeth shortly after. 

____

\- High school can be a really messed up place. Let’s just leave it at “my attitude surely made someone’s else’s time in that shithole a living hell”, for my sake –

____

\- Did you ever apologize for it? – 

____

Joe’s posture gives away his tension, the grip on his hand tightening. 

____

His eyes scream, long forgotten shame and guilt clear as a mirror.

____

\- I did – His gaze wanders off for a second, Joe’s breathing ritual not making him chuckle this time around – I only wish I hadn’t put myself in a position that required me to do so – 

____

\- If it makes you feel better, I was an asshole as well, in my own way -

____

Joe’s expression is a mix of bafflement, disbelief and amusement. 

____

\- There was this girl. She, uh… I let her down. Led her on. Made promises I couldn’t keep. And I never apologized for it, unlike you – 

____

The pause that follows is enough for him to lose himself in the shame of having acted like such an irredeemable prick.

____

\- I find it hard to believe – 

____

\- I try not to dwell on it too much... but the only thing I regret more than hurting her is not apologizing for it – 

____

Joe hesitates before making the question Nico loathes answering.

____

\- What _did_ you do? – 

____

Joe’s eyes are curious, but warm. Unjudging, shade of disbelief lingering on.

____

_Will you think less of me if I tell you?_

____

_In… and out._

____

_Heh. The ritual's starting to make much more sense now._

____

\- I asked her to give me some time to think. Told her I wasn’t in the right headspace to make a relationship truly happen. Lots of shit happening at home, it’s-not-you-it’s me and all that bullshit – _She had her fair share of shit to deal with at home, based on what she told me. So, naturally, I had to go and add on to the pile_ \- The kind of shit that you’d expect from a total jackass afraid of commitment, basically – 

____

\- That’s harsh. But… I get why you still feel guilty about it – Joe’s hand brings his own up to his lips, kissing it with kindness he doesn’t feel is earned at the moment - Did you like her? – 

____

He’s had plenty of time to narrow down how things went down the way they did. He knows the answers to all these questions backwards at this point.

____

\- I liked to think that I did. It was nice to feel _"normal"_ for a change. Until it wasn't. It was dreadful to have to pretend. I was lying to her as much as I was lying to myself. Would have made things a hell of a lot easier if I'd truly liked her – 

____

\- Was that when you realized that… you know? –

____

\- That I liked sucking dick? – 

____

\- I was going to say “you’re into guys”, but that’s a more eloquent way of putting it, I suppose –

____

\- You know me. I’m _funny_ like that –

____

The sarcasm in his voice makes Joe’s expression turn somewhat sour.

____

\- It’s not your fault you didn’t feel the same way she did –

____

\- No. But I did choose to lie to her face and… lead her on. Every time – 

____

\- You ever got around to seeing her again? After it all went to shit, I mean– 

____

\- No. Still not sure if it was luck or the other way around – 

____

\- I’m not saying it was the best possible outcome, but it was probably for the best – 

____

\- You really think so? – 

____

His voice comes out challenging. Not the kind of tone he was expecting to be using on Joe after the progress they’ve made.

____

\- You weren’t happy with her, were you? – 

__\- I was miserable, Joe – His eyes wander, focusing on anything but Joe, shame stabbing at him the same way a hidden blade would – It was... it’s the kind of feeling I wouldn’t wish it on anybody –_ _

____

\- Which leads me to my point – Joe’s hand reaches up to his cheek, meeting resistance when they come into contact. Nico caves after a second passes. Joe’s daggers shine, equal parts understanding and sad – She didn’t deserve that, but you didn’t deserve to be unhappy just so she wouldn’t be. You would’ve been toxic for each other. You probably would’ve ended up hating each other eventually – 

____

_But did I have to be such a fucking asshole about it?_

____

\- I broke her heart, Joe – 

____

\- Your heart is important as well, darling. And you’re the kindest and most beautiful soul I’ve ever met – 

____

\- You sound so sure about it – 

____

\- I am. And I’m planning to remind you about it as often as I can – 

____

Nico’s eyes turn pleading. Broken. Burdened by guilt and heartache.

____

\- Do you… - _Be honest, Joe. I beg of you_ – Do you think she ever forgave me for it? –

____

He doesn’t answer straight away. 

____

Joe’s hand slides down to Nico’s neck, latching on, spreading comfort that slowly but surely starts to ease the god-awful sensation and weight on his chest.

____

\- I sincerely hope she found it in her heart to do so, when the moment was right – 

____

\- That’s cryptic – 

____

\- I just hope you find some closure about it as well – 

____

Joe’s black eyes are doing marvels in helping him achieve just that.

____

He was stupid. And young. He didn’t know any better. Neither did Joe, as it turns out.

____

Life doesn’t really get better. Your skin just gets tougher. You learn to cope with the guilt and heartache a little more with each passing day. 

____

Sometimes, you can’t help but hurt someone on the process. 

____

And it burns like hell, once you realize the extent and burden that that hurt and pain entail.

____

Turns out, it’s shared. Whether you want it to or not.

____

\- I’m working on it – 

____

He allows himself the joy and solace of leaning into Joe’s shoulder and letting the tears slide down his cheek. 

____

\- It’s not easy Nico. And I can’t carry your load for you – He looks up to Joe, his hands wrapping tightly around his chest, wishing he could stay there for an eternity in order to heal all the wounds and scars he’s kept to himself for the longest time - But you don’t have to carry it all on your own anymore – 

____

\- Neither do you, my love – 

____

The smile that Joe gifts him is as heavenly as this earthly existence allows. 

____

It’s soft, overflowing with color and the promise of better days to come all at the same time.

____

It’s hurt, expertly concealed, and now shared between the two.

____

Two tumbling trees, bracing against the hurricane, now relying on the other to stay upright.

____

All things considered, his luck is not as bad as he’s deemed it to be. 

____

His future is Joe. Any storm that dares come his way is the unlucky one, to his eyes.

____

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes. The poetry Joe recites is actually mine. That Sáenz fella is an alter ego of sorts? If you guys/gals/NB pals are familiar with Fernando Pessoa you should feel right at home. 
> 
> I actually LOVE how the poem turned out and I hope you guys liked it! Be sure to share your thoughts/feedback if you feel like it.
> 
> And hey, if you decide to share it be sure to give me a heads-up so I can retweet, reblog or like when you do! And also praise the author to heaven, hell and back. I'm nice like that.


	10. (You're the) Devil in Disguise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Puako, Hawaii – Haven_
> 
> _5:30 p.m._
> 
> \- And… here. This would be your room – 
> 
> \- Bullshit – He clarifies as soon as Joe rewards him with an exhausted, baffled expression - There’s bound to be another surprise flight or car-ride, in there somewhere – 
> 
> \- Will you ever cut me some slack about that? I’ve done the trip at least a dozen times now. I forgot about it –
> 
> \- Sure – 
> 
> \- Think you can handle your bag from here _all_ the way to the bed, or do you need me to carry it inside too, as atonement? - 
> 
> \- You know, you could have just built this place somewhere like California. The 4-hour flight to Houston was bad enough – 
> 
> \- So dramatic – 
> 
> \- Well, if you then add the 10 hours to Honolulu **and then**... -

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nile is finally here, babes. 
> 
> And hey, so is Fowler! The handsomest dog in the history of mankind (right after my own doggo)! 
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy! Have an awesome week and keep it up. You're doing GREAT!

## (You're the) Devil in Disguise

_Puako, Hawaii – Haven_

_5:30 p.m._

\- And… here. This would be your room – 

\- Bullshit – He clarifies as soon as Joe rewards him with an exhausted, baffled expression - There’s bound to be another surprise flight or car-ride, in there somewhere – 

\- Will you ever cut me some slack about that? I’ve done the trip at least a dozen times now. I forgot about it –

\- Sure – 

\- Think you can handle your bag from here _all_ the way to the bed, or do you need me to carry it inside too, as atonement? - 

\- You know, you could have just built this place somewhere like California. The 4-hour flight to Houston was bad enough – 

\- So dramatic – 

\- Well, if you then add the 10 hours to Honolulu **and then**... - 

\- This is as remote as it gets, darling. If we had built this right in the middle of Times Square it would kind of defeat the purpose – 

\- Fine. Just give me a heads-up next time. I would’ve brought a book or something – 

\- Didn’t take you for a reader – 

\- My glasses are still on the bag. And hey, I didn’t take you for a flight-junkie – He snatches the bag from Joe’s hand, stepping inside and struggling not to give away just how _perfect_ the room is. No way he's letting Joe off the hook _that easy_ \- and yet, here we are. Nearly a fucking day spent on a plane, with my ass feeling like… -

Joe rolls his eyes as he steps inside, falling back into the welcoming routine he knows by heart, without even noticing. He listens to Nico complain absentmindedly as he heads straight for the window, determined to shut him up with the breathtaking view waiting behind the curtain. 

\- … genuinely surprised there wasn’t a submarine ride involved. I mean, that would’ve been cool (so cool), but I swear to God, hon… - 

\- You done? – 

\- I’m inclined to… - Nico’s eyes grow even more expressive and wide than usual, somehow - **Wow** – 

\- Yeah – 

Nico walks up beside him, unable to think of another crazy-ass (and not entirely unlikely) scenario, as the vista extending in front of them enraptures his attention.

_We did consider an underwater facility way back when, but the budget turned out... ok, I might be getting a little off-track._

The sun is currently on a lazy mission to meet the horizon. A predominantly blue palette that ranges from peach, twirls its way into rose, and bleeds into a marriage of lilac and indigo, as far as the eye can see.

It’s a purple sunset, soothing, elegant and effortlessly breathtaking. And seemingly a sure-fire way to keep Nico from talking. 

_This should be a rather quiet vacation from here on out._

Nico’s inner light is brought into the foreground, illuminated by the last rays of sun of the day, casting him in a soft shade of blue that makes Joe’s smile feel permanent.

The way Nico marvels at the colors of the sky, and the seemingly never-ending expanse of blue the sun is aching to kiss, make for a truly spectacular combination, to Joe’s eyes. 

Nico’s child-like enthusiasm once again makes itself evident, unrestrained in its sincerity, and making Joe’s heart feel like it’s about to burst due to the overwhelming amount of joy in his chest. 

_I can’t wait to wake him up to see the sunrise tomorrow._

He huffs out loud, Nico not even blinking in acknowledgement.

_He’ll probably hate me for it, but it’ll be worth the ass-whooping if I can see this smile again._

\- It’s a long-ass trip, but you’ve got to admit that the view makes up for it – 

\- It's, uh... – Nico coughs, suddenly aware of his surroundings once again, and giving away how full of it his next statement is - I’ve seen better – 

Joe raises an eyebrow, incredulous.

_Like hell you have. But fine. I’ll play along._

\- I haven’t shown you the sunrise yet. What don't you sleep on it, and reserve your innacurate judgements until then? – 

Nico’s smile is now swimming in a sea of smugness.

\- That your idea of a date? – 

\- Waking your charming ass out of bed at 5 in the morning, and hearing you complain about it until noon? Kind of a hard sell, darling – 

\- Well, it doesn’t sound so great when you say it like _that_ , but there’s bound to be _someone_ around here that’s interested in such a **train-wreck** – 

\- Hmn. I’m quite a train-wreck myself, so what do you say I pick you up here, say, around 6? – 

Nico’s pained smile carries enough pain to push out laughter deep from Joe’s belly.

\- Any chance we can push that back to somewhere around… I don't know, 10? – 

\- You’re serious? – He turns, facing him directly and incredulity now in full force - You _are_ serious. So, wait. What time do you usually wake up? – 

\- Uh, _early_ – 

_That sounds an awful lot like a question, darling._

He deadpans Nico’s whimsical grin.

\- Noon doesn’t qualify as _early_ , Nico – 

\- Well, I’m sorry if I’m not up-and-about chasing sunrises at 4 in the morning, but some of us like to sleep? You… infuriatingly handsome… obscenely muscular weirdo – 

\- I wake up at 5:30 – 

\- Is… that supposed to make you look _less_ weird? –

\- Is it working? –

Nico snorts, Joe soon joining the concert of hilarity that follows.

As laughter dies down, the exhaustion incessantly prickling on the back of his mind joins the party. 

If he's being totally honest with himself, it's a rather significant amount of bashfulness trying to pass as exhaustion.

_I can’t just invite myself to share the room... can I?_

_I mean... no._

\- I should leave you to it – 

_So brave._

Nico cocks his head to the side, gently. 

His face manages to remains neutral. His voice, not as much.

\- Is it bed time already? – 

_Sarcasm is meant to be my thing, darling._

\- I wouldn't want to... I thought you were tired? – 

\- Annoyed. But, uh… you know. Not tired enough to call it a day, just yet – 

Nico prays to all the gods in existence that he isn’t blushing.

_You could cut the sexual tension in here with a spoon._

Joe’s mind is on a much more innocent train of thought. For the moment, at least. 

_Would he fall for it? If I told him there aren’t any other rooms available, other than this one?_

\- We could… - _Don’t blush, dumbass_ \- I mean, I could show you around. If you don’t mind – 

\- I don’t mind at all. But you might want to take a Red Bull before we head out. I wouldn’t want you to fall asleep on the way – 

\- One of these days I’m going to find a habit of yours I can bitch about, and you won’t hear the end of it – 

\- In the meantime – Nico grasps Joe’s hand as he heads for the door, pulling him along as if he knew his way around the complex – I get to complain about this quirk of yours all I want. At least until you share another one – 

Joe finds himself stumbling behind Nico, in a way that is as uncharacteristically clumsy as it is light-hearted and floaty.

_If Andy or Quynh saw me like this, they’d have a field-day roasting my sorry-ass._

_I hope we don’t run into them._

° ° °

_6:40 p.m._

\- I swear to God, it’s like they put a tracker on us, too –

\- Give us some credit, Johnny. We’re much more subtle than that – 

\- We figured we had an hour or so before you managed to sneak up on us – 

\- Well, we were kind of looking for you two, actually. There’s been a… slight change of plans – 

Joe doesn’t miss how Andy evades his gaze when she speaks. 

_Oh, my God. What did you **do**?_

His daggers become laser-focused on her, as Quynh takes up the mantle of the news-bearer. 

\- You two love-birds are gonna have to bunk up together – 

Nico represses a smile through pursed lips, internally screaming in glee, and the urge to kiss both Andy and Quynh square on the lips as strong as a tidal wave.

_Well, that was easy. I didn’t even have to embarass myself by making up a shitty excuse to Joe._

Andy fails to keep the laughter at bay, but manages to turn it into a cough, for the sake of remaining mature on her and Quynh’s high-school-like shenanigans.

Joe is… conflicted. Endlessly happy, somewhat anxious, but conflicted. 

And seconds away from losing his mind in a rather loud display of panic and frustration.

But happy, for the most part. Not with Quynh. And even less with Andy, the seeming master-mind behind this turn of events, if her inability to look at him in the eyes is of any indication.

_I could murder you right here and now._

\- Suspicious how that turned out – 

\- You're welcome, by the way - 

_I'm going to murder you too, right after I'm done dealing with Andy._

Nico’s cheeks are red enough to mistake them for tomatoes. Andy is…

Joe sighs.

Let’s just say Quynh’s confidence diverts attention from her, currently hiding her amusement with her hand, and looking anywhere but in Joe’s direction. She leans into Quynh’s frame, struggling to keep her cool.

\- I mean, that, uh… that’s shouldn’t be a problem, right? – 

Joe turns to face Nico’s questioning, feeling his heart shatter into a million pieces, once he detects the uncertainty and shade of disappointment in them.

\- Wait, no – _No, no, no_ \- I mean, of course not. That would be – Joe’s dorky smile and dreamy eyes send Andy into a full-on coughing fit – I was actually wondering if… I mean, I didn’t know – 

\- So, that’s settled then – 

\- Real nice of you to break the news, which you obviously had _nothing_ to do with, right? – 

\- We figured you wouldn’t have the balls to invite him to your room yourself, darling – 

\- Oh, you little… - 

\- You guys alright? – 

Joe’s eyes lose themselves in Nile’s knowing grin and her young, carefree demeanor, despite being relegated to a wheelchair.

She doesn’t look a day over 25, and yet her eyes seem desperate to say otherwise. 

_A force of nature, in many, many (many) ways._

\- We’re… breaking the news to Joe – Niles looks up to Andy, confusion clear to someone familiar with her expressions. At least she’s much more subtle than Quynh, as well as her shamelessly malicious checkmate just minutes prior - About sharing a room with Nico? – 

\- He is… right. The... hmn... - 

Quynh jumps in to the rescue.

\- The new recruits – 

\- The new recruits! – 

Andy is slower to recuperate and become an active participant in the conversation.

\- The new… - 

Quynh’s smile is tight when she faces her.

\- _Yes_. The ones that arrived last… - 

Nile’s turn.

\- Yesterday –

Quynh snaps her fingers.

\- Last minute – 

\- Yeah. Totally forgot about it because of the whole party thing – 

Andy points at Nile, slowly regaining her composure after her laughing fit.

\- The party – 

\- Wait, _what_? – He lets Nico’s chuckle slide, this one time - There’s a **party** too? – 

Nile looks pretty damn proud of herself.

_Great to see some things just never change._

\- You bet your ass there is. Andy gave us a heads-up. Managed to cook something up with our day head-start – 

Quynh hand wraps itself around Andy’s bicep, Andy providing a fond smile in return.

\- Come on, Johnny. Parties are fun – 

\- I’m still recovering from the last one – 

Nico’s fingers wrap against his own, tender, sending a reassuring spark across his arm and all the way up to his chest.

\- Should give you the chance to process that you’ll be sleeping next to Nico from here on out – 

Nico’s fingers twitch against his own.

\- Andy, you are on some **MIGHTY** thin… - 

\- Hey, Joe, can I have a minute? –

He can’t help but give Nile a cold, evaluating look, suspicious to a degree that is laughable.

_This is more stressful than Cancún._

\- Depends –

Nico walks up to Quynh and Andy, his back stopping Joe from reading his facial expressions, and the distance disabling any chance of listening what he’s whispering in Quynh’s ear.

Nile’s amused expression turns dangerous in a heartbeat when she detects his distrustful, annoyed tone.

_I’d almost forgotten how she only takes shit from…_

_Never mind._

\- Depends on _what_? –

He glances at Nico and his entourage. He provides him with an exasperated, reassuring smile and a wink of his eye. 

Andy and Quynh place their hands on his shoulders, last glimpse of the trio before Nico blinks them off to God knows where being Quynh’s mischievous (and down-right diabolical) look, and Andy’s failure to keep the laughter she’d been holding back for the past handful of minutes at bay.

With the characteristic finger-snapping sound and a whoosh of air, the trio disappears from sight, leaving Nile and Joe all set for the conversation Joe had been dying to get of his chest. 

She pfts.

\- Show-off -

\- Not sure I want to find out what they’re up to – 

\- Andy and Quynh are trouble enough on their own – Her eyes land on his, questioning and attentive as ever – Not sure about your man though – 

\- He’s, uh… not even sure where to begin, regarding Nico –

\- Is it official? – 

\- His name? Haven't seen his birth certificate yet, but I think it is –

Nile rewards his wit with a punch on the shoulder that he most definitely feels.

That his skin is bullet-proof doesn’t mean he’s immune to her or Andy’s rather brute displays of affection.

\- Smartass – 

\- Listen, I’ve been meaning to catch up, but promise me you don’t have any more surprises up your sleeve. I think I’ve filled my quota for… what’s left of the year – 

\- You sound like you need a drink, man – 

They start leisurely strolling their way down the cozy hall, colored in red and personality oozing from every space that isn’t either a door or window. 

\- I do. And again, no more surprises from here on out would be a welcome bonus –

\- I’m a girl who only makes promises she can keep, man. But hey, A for effort – 

He rolls his eyes mentally, but chuckles out loud.

_Where the hell do I even start?_

\- You too patched things up then? – 

\- We… _definitely_ talked things out -

\- I was starting to lose hope - 

\- And there was some apologizing involved – He concedes, for the sake of keeping his honest streak – Mostly, mine –

\- Mostly? – 

\- Anyway, it was – _It feels like heaven to stop carrying all that shit over my shoulder_ – I feel great. And Nico is… - _The most gorgeous man, in the history of civilization?_ \- he’s _great_. **Beyond** great – 

_I’ve started writing poetry for the guy, for crying out loud._

\- He kept on stealing glances at you like you were the cure for all ailments in existence and beyond – 

He shoves the wheel, sending her wheelchair on a crash course towards the nearest wall. After doing some course-correction, Nile makes sure to have the same wheel crush his foot, cruel satisfaction on her lips as Joe winces and groans in pain.

\- Serves you right, lover-boy – 

\- That was… justified – 

\- Man. You really head-over-heels in for the guy, huh? – 

_Stop blushing, damn it._

_Is it **that** obvious?_

\- What gave it away? – 

\- Please. Look on your face when you talk about him _alone_ just gave me diabetes –

\- Why is everyone so dramatic all of the sudden…? – 

\- Point being, I’ve never really seen you like this – 

\- _This_ being a good look for me, I hope –

\- Again, diabetes-inducing. But hey, if he doesn’t mind, who am I to judge? – 

\- What’s your verdict on him, by the way? 

\- Huh – She stops the wheelchair dead on its tracks, for effect - So, you’re **serious** , serious? – 

\- You always remind me how your seal of approval is of utmost importance, and now you feel like leaving me hanging? - 

\- Don’t get to use it as often as I’d like. You’ll have to forgive me for feeling a little lost – 

\- Come on – 

\- He’s… - She stops as she reaches the handrail, the darkened sky and very last glimpses of sunlight giving the scene a rather serene and dream-like feel - You seem happy, Joe. And you’ve been dancing around each other for a **long** fucking time at this point. It was getting embarassing, even for your standards –

\- Gee, thanks - He can't help but smile, replaying Nico's wink in his mind, when he departed with Andy and Quynh - I don’t think he realizes just how bad I have it in for him –

Nile gags, internally.

_Diabetes, you here to stay, aren't you?_

\- You be sure to let him know then. Buy the fucker some flowers. Read him some of your poetry. Hell, sing him a song later today. Your singing voice makes everyone on the vicinity weak on the knees – 

\- Except for you – 

\- Missed your chance, man. Got my eyes and attention on a much more attainable prize – 

\- Pft. Shame you had to settle for my boy James – 

\- He’s a dumbass, but he’s… - He doesn’t miss how her smile grows equally juvenile and dreamy. Much like the one he usually has reserved for Nico, or the one he often catches Quynh shamelessly gifting Andy - He’s the Quynh to my Andy – 

\- That is some **mighty-high** praise, right there – 

\- The man’s earned it – She eyes the wheelchair provinding her with support, decorated and bedazzled to the point of no return by the brats that have been driving her nuts for almost a year now- This metal contraption has only made him even more attentive than usual – 

\- Please don’t go down the innuendo road. I can barely keep up with Andy and Quynh – 

\- Don’t tempt me. Although, my man _is_ **mighty** well-equipped – 

\- Oh, for **fuck's** sake... –

Joe's barfing-like sounds are muffled by Nile's uproarious laughter, echoing across the floors below the balcony they've settled in.

° ° °

\- Oh, yes _you are_! Yes, you are. I mean, look at you! You’re so fluffy, and handsome and I could just… - 

\- You could have warned me about this – 

\- And miss this? Please –

\- … you like that, don’t you? Yes, you do! I could scratch your belly **all** …-

\- And besides, Fowler seems into it. Don’t be grumpy –

\- I think Joe might have just lost his boyfriend –

\- I heard that – Nico then proceeds to continue providing Fowler with a rather enthusiastic display of affection that would make Joe jealous to the point of collapse – What are you wagging your tail for, buddy? Are you happy? Yes, you are! Look at you, all… -

\- Serves him right for not keeping an eye on him – 

They remain close-by, unable to get back to work due to the endearing and amusing war of kisses, belly-rubbing and tongue-bathing in front of them.

\- I want to see what’s what over in the kitchen. Want to join? –

\- I think ’ll stay and supervise this a little while longer – 

\- Think he’s going to steal your dog? – 

\- I just might. Oh, you like that, don't ya? I know you... - 

\- I think I need to stick around in case Fowler – She turns and faces both Nico and her pampered Rottweiler, raising her voice, equal parts playful and commanding - forgets who his real owner is? – 

Nico’s and Fowler’s eyes grow wide, in a short-lived panic that Nico soon chuckles about. Fowler’s posture and ears remain perked up, unsure what to expect from the leader of the pack.

\- Suit yourself – Quynh kisses Andy’s cheek, breaking a smile when Andy’s finger’s wrap around hers and pull her closer for an actual kiss. Once Andy's done making her point, she lets go of Quynh's waist - Want to see what kind of wine we’ll be dealing with tonight – 

\- Trying to get me drunk? – 

\- That’s up to you, doll. Just making sure we have something worthwhile to drink –

\- My hero – 

\- You know me – 

As she starts walking away, Andy’s eyes can’t help but give her a once-over, marveled at how stunning she looks in the killer get-up she put together. Her curved, post-shower hair only adds to her casual air, the way she sways her hips as she walks as graceful as it is eye-catching.

She does a slow 180°, rewarding Andy’s curious gaze with a bewitching smile, making Andy’s knees wobble.

Andy’s smile is less accentuated due to her more hermetic, Joe-like personality, but carrying the same underlying emotion.

Nico is deeply aware of Quynh’s departure. He busies himself scratching Fowler’s ear, unsure whether he’s ready for the deal with the intimidating and well-earned reputation Andy has garnered over the years in his mind. 

_Not sure I’m ready for The Talk. But then again, maybe she doesn’t give a rat’s ass if I am._

She kneels down beside him, hand reaching out for Fowler’s ears. He tries to chew on her fingers, playfully. She bops his nose with just enough strength to remind him who’s boss.

He drops and rolls on his back, this surprisingly muscular belly beckoning both Nico and Andy for some well-earned rubbing.

\- He seems to like you – 

\- I’m more interested in knowing whether his owner feels the same way – 

_You could always drop on your back and show your belly._

\- You managed to get Joe’s attention, so you’re off to a good start, at least – 

\- I’m mighty impressed with him, so there’s that – 

\- Are you now? – 

\- He can be quite charming, if properly incentivized– 

\- Could’ve fooled me –

\- Ha! He’s… - He busies himself deeper into Fowler’s belly, chuckling as his mouth rolls out of his tongue due to the excitement and gratification of getting so much attention 

– I didn’t realize how much I missed seeing him with his guard down. So... relaxed – 

\- He’d been pretty out of it for a while. I was actually getting kind of worried – 

\- I'm having a hard time picturing him that way, after the past couple hours –

\- Whatever it is you're doing, it's working. He’s never been the most open guy. Usually keeps to himself. All work, and more work – 

\- Sad? – 

Her eyes wander for a split second, deciding what word describes Joe’s behavior, up until now, best.

\- _Conflicted_ – 

_Lost. Unfulfilled. And... yeah. There was definitely some sadness in there too._

\- Nice to know I wasn’t the only one. Sort of – 

They entertain themselves for a short while by giving Fowler the love he can never get enough off, despite the entirety of the personnel and recruits pampering the dog to the point of being ridiculous.

\- I really like him, you know? – 

\- This would come as a shock if you weren’t so shameless about it –

\- And I’m… I guess I just want you to know… -

\- Stop – 

Fowler’s ears perk up, intrigued by the change of tone. 

\- Why are you telling me this? – 

_Why am I indeed?_

\- I guess I just want to make sure we’re all on the same page – 

\- Alright then – She stops rubbing Fowler’s belly, body language projecting confidence and how her attention is fully focused on him - Should I be worried? About you and Joe – 

Part of him is inclined to go on a long, self-indulgent explanation of what Joe means to him. How crazy he is about they guy. How he means to cherish and fall further head-over-heels for him, from dusk until dawn, every day, for as long as he’s able to.

He soon realizes, when it comes to Andy, he doesn’t need to. 

He just needs to be sincere, in a much cruder and leaner way than he’s used to.

He holds her gaze, surprised at how confident and certain he is on the statement he’s about to proclaim.

\- I’m crazy about him. And I fully intend to never make him feel like that’s not the case – 

\- You’ve never given me a reason to doubt it. But I do appreciate you being so frank – 

\- I’m guessing that restraining myself from giving a never-ending ode of the way I feel about him is also appreciated – 

She smiles fondly as an answer.

\- Quite. As much as he loves it, my patience only goes so far – 

\- I figured you had a never-ending reserve of that virtue, putting up with Quynh on a near-daily basis –

\- She is a dozen times more charming than Joe – 

\- Oh, ok – 

\- Is that _sarcasm_ I detect? – 

\- More like disbelief – 

\- And what exactly is so hard to believe? –

\- That you actually, truly, seem to believe that’s the case – 

\- Are you high, by any chance? It would explain a lot – 

Nico’s laugh is enthusiastic and genuine enough for one to escape from Andy’s lips as well.

\- I don’t need to smoke a joint to confess just how much I love… uh, hmn –

He cuts himself short too late, his coughing and red cheeks making Andy’s attempt to resist laughter a monumentally difficult task. 

\- What was _that_? – 

\- _What was_ – His voice’s pitch is high enough for him to cough yet again, in a poor attempt at salvaging the disaster he brought upon himself – What was what? –

\- **God** , you’re a hopeless sap –

********

\- Oh, shut up – 

********

\- No, I mean. The bedroom eyes and the ass-appreciation were understandable, to a degree, but man. You have it and you have it **bad** –

********

_You could have just started with that. Would have been equally embarassing, but shorter._

********

\- Kinda regretting working up the nerve of staying to talk to you right now – 

********

\- Ok, calm down. I’m just pulling your leg – 

********

\- And obliterating what's left of my dignity in the process. How kind of you! –

********

\- There’s nothing to be ashamed of, Nico – 

********

\- Your teasing says otherwise – 

********

\- Alright, let’s cut the crap then – 

********

\- Oh? – 

********

\- I don’t… really believe in fate, or soulmates or all that mysticism crap that Quynh is so confidently rubbing in my face at every chance she gets. And trust me, she’s made it her life-mission to sell me in on it – 

********

\- Worked on me – 

********

\- Regardless… I can’t deny that some things just fit. In a way that doesn’t seem to obey logic or common sense or… whatever law’s the universe seems to be functioning on. Me and Quynh don’t make sense as a couple. We disagree on a degree of things that is quite simply – _Understatement of the year_ \- ridiculous. And her not being able to fold socks like a normal person… -

********

\- What's up with that, right? – 

********

_I’m going to cut you some slack for interrupting me this one time._

********

_But yeah._

********

\- … will always drive me up the fucking wall, almost as much as her not putting the cap back on the toothpaste or leaving her underwear on the… - 

********

\- No need to go _that_ far into detail – 

********

\- I swear to God, Nico… - She sighs, playing deaf ears on Nico’s chuckling - … what I’m getting at is – 

********

_What am I getting at?_

********

\- The way Joe feels for you - _The frustration and passion in his voice when he so much as mentions your name. The way he smiles when you make a joke. How the thought of you being in danger seems to make him lose all common sense and restraint and his entire freaking sanity. And let’s not forget the number of poems and songs he’s **definitely** written about you _– You just can’t fake something like that – 

********

There’s something deeply unsettling and fascinating, seeing Joe be so hilariously challenged and so remarkably full of life and emotion that she’s still trying to wrap her head around the incongruency. 

********

_It’s nonsense. But it works. Somehow, it just does._

********

\- I can’t fully comprehend how he could fall for someone who’s the exact opposite of himself – _I still don’t_ \- And yet, he did – _It was about damn time, too_ \- And I can’t bring myself to imagine him, without you to drive him insane anymore. I don’t want to – 

********

Nico’s eyes glisten, his furious attempts at keeping his emotions in check making 

********

Andy’s chest pang with both heartache and relief.

_God, you really are a fucking sap. You overtly sentimental and wonderful moron._

\- So, no. I don’t believe in fairytales or magic or any of that crap. But I do believe in what I see. And what you and Joe have is real. It makes him happy. The most obnoxious and happy he’s ever been. And to me, that is more than enough – 

********

\- I thought… I thought I was supposed to be the hopeless romantic – 

********

His eyes are wet, but his smirk is so poorly concealed that her gaze soon turns into knives.

********

\- I could punch your lights out right now, and not feel the slightest bit sorry about it – 

********

\- You could, but that would leave Joe with an unconscious sap of a boyfriend for the rest of the night – 

********

\- He did **not** call you his boyfriend – _I mean, he wouldn’t… right?_ – Because if he did, he’s never going to hear the end of it – 

********

\- Oh, you wouldn’t be _that_ cruel –

********

\- Oh, I could. But we both now it’s not _me_ we should be worried about – 

********

His confusion is fleeting, realization sending him into a fit of laughter that is soon echoed by Andy, as soon as he voices out one final thought on the matter.

********

\- Oh, he is _so_ **FUCKED** – 

********

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe almost 2k folks have decided to give me a chance, but hey, here we are! Thanks so much!
> 
> Thanks to those still sticking around, and who are still excited to see what crazy shenanigans I cook up for the gang. I really appreciate those of you how are taking the time to read what my quirky mind is up to, creative-wise.
> 
> Stay safe, stay weird and stay awesome. You guys/gals/NB folks rock!


	11. Neon and Moonlight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _The Dancefloor – Late_
> 
> He’ll never understand how Nile managed to pull off an event like this in the time she seemingly had at her disposal, but at this point he’s learned to just go with it. 
> 
> As much as it pains him to admit it, he’s actually having a great time.
> 
> Having Nico’s body so close to his own might have something to do with that.
> 
> The music's maintained a rather juvenile and indecipherable quality up until this point of the night. It also threatens to turn him deaf with each passing song. 
> 
> It’s probably for the best. Helps keep his mind off of how enticing and tempting it is to have Nico dancing the night away in front of him - that wicked, carefree smile on his lips, aphrodisiac scent and sinful warmth making his body inch closer and closer to Nico’s slender frame – and how unbearable the need to have him right there and then has become.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Might have to bump the rating up at the rate this is going. 
> 
> I'm not complaining, but hey, thought I'd let you know that there's a chance things might get... spicy, further on.

## Neon and Moonlight

_The Dancefloor – Late_

He’ll never understand how Nile managed to pull off an event like this in the time she seemingly had at her disposal, but at this point he’s learned to just go with it. 

As much as it pains him to admit it, he’s actually having a great time.

Having Nico’s body so close to his own might have something to do with that.

The music's maintained a rather juvenile and indecipherable quality up until this point of the night. It also threatens to turn him deaf with each passing song. 

It’s probably for the best. Helps keep his mind off of how enticing and tempting it is to have Nico dancing the night away in front of him - that wicked, carefree smile on his lips, aphrodisiac scent and sinful warmth making his body inch closer and closer to Nico’s slender frame – and how unbearable the need to have him right there and then has become. 

His self-control is nothing short of legendary, given how long it’s managed to keep things PG, rather than the R-rating Nico’s eyes and body language demands.

He feels… light. Like gravity has suddenly decided to take a break, without giving them a heads-up.

He finds himself deeply amused at the fact that he doesn’t care in the slightest.

The air is loud, saline and oh, so warm. His arms, on a mission to caress every inch of Nico’s skin in sight, as well as all the other parts he’s more cautious and uncertain he’s allowed to worship with so many eyes around.

His hands find Nico’s hips, and in response, Nico’s arms wrap around his neck, his beautiful eyes, lips, nose and face approaching his own like a sun. A never-ending embrace he wants to hold in his arms and memory for an eternity.

The songs in the background don’t seem interested in saying anything, the lyrics way too convoluted and synthetic to extract any meaningful or compelling idea. They swim across the air in a sea of bass, percussion, synths and an occasionally jarring instrument that ends up complimenting the tunes surprisingly well. It’s an experimental dance-number, with Nico and himself in the spotlight, surrounded by a sea of teen-like abandon and shameless joy.

It’s fittingly tropical drinks, wildly-swinging limbs and hair, stolen glances, and a blur of voices. Dozens of singing, humming, laughing voices, seeking shelter from the outside world in this loud and bizarre time-capsule that’ll become a hazy memory come morning. 

It’s like levitating, free from restraint and common sense. It’s wild and liberating.

And he wants the night to last forever, if he has a say in it.

° ° °

_Oh, Joe. You have no idea what those eyes are doing to me._

Their gazes have spent the vast majority of the night connected, bodies mirroring the link with their shared proximity and warmth.

Joe’s eyes are hard to describe (nothing new there), with a hurricane of noise, scents and emotions pleasantly assaulting their senses from all directions. It’s a strangely welcome kind of overwhelming, after the crazy couple of days (hours?) they’ve marathoned past.

Joe’s hands are daring, in a way that makes him feel equally safe and hungry for more. They land on his hips, a relatively respectful distance being kept until he rolls his eyes and moves forward, desperate to drown himself further into Joe, and all the wonderful glimpses and bits of him he can process after his third ( _pretty sure it’s the fourth_ ) drink.

_No, wait. Five._

His not drunk ( _or is it he’s?_ ), not by a mile ( _I’m not!_ ). He’s at the spot. The air feels like a contradicting mix of lightweight and staggering. His hips feel loser, shame at being a god-awful dancer - lacking in any sense of gracefulness or rhythm - all but evaporating in the warm breeze and darkness, bathed in flashing lights and moonlight.

He feels confident in the art of seduction, knowing Joe’s eyes are so delightfully laser-focused on him. His movements grow bolder. His eyes, hungrier. His hands, more playful, curiosity at full-throttle. He can’t help it. 

All those years holding back, dancing the night away with girls who were great, but far from what he was aching for. So much time tricking himself to keep up the façade, praying a guy would grow up the nerve to step up and extend his hand, leading the charge and taking control. Miraculously make all his doubts, hesitation and self-doubt fade away with a slow-dancing twirl and a firm hand, leading him up to the clouds beyond. 

Now, he laughs. It’s hilarious how he can be the one making the moves. Having the initiative. Giving a damn what jealous eyes and ignorant, childish minds might or might not think.

_He is everything I’ve ever needed, and more. Much, much, so much more._

His emeralds meet Joe’s jet-black daggers; their sharpness and bewitching, enamoring qualities on full display.

_I must be in heaven._

Joe’s hands latch on deeper into his waist, the warmth they convey on his sensitive skin setting him further ablaze with need. 

Joe’s smile is a Sun, drowning out the chaos surrounding them, and lifting any remains of heartache or doubt from his mind.

_It’s not so bad._

° ° °

_The table Quynh, Andy and Nile are gossiping up a storm in – Still late_

\- That’s _so not_ how it happened! – 

\- BULLSHIT, you know it was! –

Quynh’s laughter is cut short by herself, hand in her stomach and curiosity forcing her to keep her cool.

\- Ok, that’s it. Stop lying and spill. _Now_ – 

\- You’re so fucking bossy, man – 

Andy points at Nile, grin as wide as hers, panic making her voice grow in tone and pitch.

\- She’s lying! – 

\- Takes one to know one. And hell no. You own up to your shit and admit it –

Andy blushes. Then, as if Quynh needed further confirmation, she covers her mouth with her hand, shoulder shaking due to poorly-concealed laughter.

\- I _knew_ it! – Quynh’s victory is tainted with jealousy - You had the nerve to fucking lie to my face and try to get away with it? – 

Nile chimes in, infuriatingly smug.

\- You failed, by the way – 

\- You fucking did, you gorgeous, lying _temptress_ – 

Nile’s eyes grow questioning.

\- _Temptress?_ – 

\- He wasn’t my first! – Andy turns to Nile, smacking her hand on the table repeatedly - NILE, I SWEAR TO GOD. FIX. THIS – 

\- You’re the one who lied! Why you trying to hold me accountable? –

\- He never… I wasn’t lying! – 

Quynh is fed up, to say the least.

\- Ok, you know what? Fuck you – 

Nile’s eyes grow wide.

\- Damn – 

Andy hands reach up to the sky, desperate, praying to all the Gods in existence for the strength to make it through what’s left of the night alive.

\- Damn **you**?! You’re all smug just… sitting there, turning my love life into a minefield, and _I_ have to be the one to fix it? – 

\- That’s what you get for sharing the Mezcal Fiasco behind my back! That shit was private, man! – 

Quynh points holds her drink in Andy's direction, accusing.

\- What were you expecting from a big-fat-liar like her? – 

Nile raises her voice, leaning back as much as her wheelchair allows her. 

\- Will the lying _ever **stop**_?! – 

\- Oh, you gotta be sh… - 

Quynh reaches forward to Nile, drink still in hand.

\- Amen to that – 

\- Cheers – 

Andy covers her face with her hands, groaning and conflicted to no end at how hilarious and frustrating her current predicament is.

\- You done? – 

\- Testy – 

\- Am I allowed to explain what – Andy turns to Nile, who in turn looks away, drink shielding her smirk and snickering - _actually_ happened? – 

\- Why you looking at me for?! – 

\- Yeah, you did dirty to **me**. Leave Nile out of this – 

\- FINE – 

\- _Oof_ – 

\- Shut up, man. _You_ keep quiet until I’m done – 

Nile extends her hand, inviting.

\- By all means –

\- He was not my first kiss – 

\- Bitch, I thought you were done lying...? - 

\- _He wasn’t_ – Andy points an accusing and domineering finger at Nile. She throws her hands up, lips tight - who I wanted to have my first kiss with, so I stopped him halfway through –

\- So, you **did** kiss him? – 

\- You just keep on digging yourself deeper and… - 

\- YOU’RE NOT HELPING – 

\- Fine. You kissed him. Cut yourself short. Liar. Moving on – 

\- He kissed me. I stopped him there and then because he saw fit to slip me tongue in front of fucking everyone, so I… -

She breathes. Then, groans.

\- Ok, you take over now – 

\- Oh, now you want my help? – 

\- Dude – 

\- FINE. She punched him in the throat – She loses her composure halfway through her next sentence - Knocked him the fuck **out** –

\- Well, shit – 

\- Banged his head against the table, on the way down -

\- He was _fine_! – 

Nile’s laughter is shared with Andy, although hers is once again covered by her hand, complimented with red cheeks.

\- You know you could’ve murdered him, right? – 

\- Oh, but that’s not the worst part – 

Quynh addresses Andy directly, mildly scandalized.

\- _Did_ you murder him? – 

Andy coughs, somehow stopping herself from spitting her drink.

\- What the fuck? – 

\- Well, how could it get worse than knocking his ass out? –

Andy and Nile have a silent argument with their gazes. Nile shrugs. Andy rolls her eyes.

\- I was feeling guilty as shit, so I helped take him upstairs to one of the spare rooms, and stuck around until he woke up. – 

\- Man, you should’ve… - Andy’s murderous scowl stops Nile dead on her tracks - Never mind. Go on – 

\- So, he wakes up, right? And I’m so fucking embarrassed and making excuses and feeling like a total dipshit, and he’s all: _“Oh, it’s ok. No hard feelings. I would’ve done the same_ ”. So, I’m like… dude. I knocked you the fuck out – Nile’s guffaw is soon drowned out by herself, anticipation building up like a bomb, unknown to Quynh – And get this, he places his hand on my thigh, and I’m all: _“This is fine. He’s just being nice, I guess?”_ And then the fucker tries to double down on making me feel like shit! And he’s all _“Bo-hoo, it still hurts. Maybe we could… **you know**?"_ – Quynh’s eyes grow wide, mouth dropping open in disgust and shock. Nile pfts, long-forgotten anger suddenly feeling fresh – And I swear to God, in that moment I just lost it, and I… I mean… - 

\- Oh, my _God_? What did you do then? – 

Her eyes avert Quynh's, seemingly fearing reprehension.

\- I mean, he _was_ begging for it – 

\- My money’s on slapping him square across the face – 

\- Close. She decked him. Didn’t break his jaw though… – 

\- Nice – 

\- And _then_ he actually had the fucking nerve to _try_ and hit back – 

Quynh’s disbelief and anger is soon replaced by realization.

\- I noticed the emphasis on _try_ \- 

Nile intercedes, delighted.

\- Oh, _he failed_ –

\- The nickname _Nut-Cracker_ became all the rage after the party – 

\- **Ha**!- 

\- Stuff of legend, since 2003 – 

\- Heard he got married? – 

\- Oh, yeah. To his sex-doll –

\- I can’t even tell if you’re kidding or not – 

Nile remains way too matter-of-fact, her eyes unflinching.

She then laughs, Quynh rolling her eyes and following suit.

\- He came to the party wanting to get laid, and he came out fucking **STERILE** – 

\- I gotta give it to you, babe. As far as stories go this one was _wild_ – 

Andy decides to see try her luck. 

\- Ok, girl-code – 

\- No bullshit – 

\- Think I went too far? – 

\- Are you _kidding me_? I’m sorry I wasn’t there to finish him off! – 

\- Oh, you enabler –

\- I’m _so_ proud of you, babe – 

Quynh leans in for a kiss, Andy obliging by meeting her halfway with more than a fair share of contentment.

\- _Ugh_. Get a room – 

\- What say we go for a dance and make her even more jealous? – 

\- Joke’s on you, moron – She waves her phone around, smug - Copley’s parking –

Quynh sniffs, in a way that reminds Nile of Fowler, currently on a self-imposed mission to steal some late-night snacks out of the unsupervised table just a handful of feet away. 

\- That smells like a contest, if I’ve ever heard of one – 

\- What’s on the line? – 

\- Hmn… - 

Andy turns her head just in time, her back suddenly straightening, and voice just loud enough to be heard over the music.

\- **FOWLER**! –

Fowler rushes to her side, a pained whimper that feels suspiciously loaded with resentment wheezing out of his snout.

\- What the hell, man? - She places her hands on both sides of Fowler's face, kissing his nose with enthusiasm - How’d _you_ sneak out of your room? –

Nile’s disbelief isn’t carrying venom, but rather, amusement.

\- I still can’t believe he’s got a literal room all for himself – 

Quynh snaps her fingers, inspired, accidentally turning herself invisible in the process.

She curses and proceeds to laugh along with the rest of the group

Andy looks over at Nile.

\- Didn’t you sneak Rosie up to your room every night back in high-school? – 

\- Shut up –

Quynh snaps back to visibility, voicing out the bet due to her unwillingness to let slide her stroke of genius.

\- Loser gets clean-up duty for this _handsome fella’s_ – She pats him on his ribs, for emphasis on just how handsome he is – minefield next to the cafeteria – 

__

Nile gags.

__

Andy scrunches her nose, faint memory's of Fowler's treats being particularly memorable, sadly.

__

\- _Brutal_ –

__

\- Ha! You might as well head over there now. I don’t need functioning legs to wipe your ass on the dancefloor – 

__

Quynh and Andy have on a non-verbal chastisement contest, once it dawns.

__

\- Shit – 

__

\- Man, I totally… fuck. I’m... – 

__

Nile dismisses their implied apologies with her hand and a chuckle.

__

\- Hey, don’t sweat it. Not like you two stand a chance against me and James – 

__

\- Cocky -

__

\- It’s brought me this far. Now go on. Go warm up. Might give you a small chance, at least - 

__

\- You sure? – 

__

She insists, conscious of Andy being on her merry way to stumble down a guilt-trip.

__

\- Come on, I’m just messing with you. Seriously. Go have fun. Night’s still young –

__

Before Andy can say otherwise, Quynh places a hand over hers and pulls her away from the table.

__

\- You fantastic woman, you. Don't take too long – 

__

__

\- Stop stalling and _go_ – 

__

As Andy and Quynh make their way toward Nico and Joe, Nile finds herself smiling fondly at the four of them. 

__

Her eyes lose themselves in the joyous crowd, in turn losing itself in the fleeting bliss of yet another day in paradise.

__

Her smile grows fonder as Andy and Quynh reach the other dumbass couple on the spotlight, too deep in their fantasy-like trance to notice the girls walking up to them until they shove them playfully. 

__

She glances down at her legs, heartache and frustration doing its daily check-in.

__

She places a hand on her thigh, wistful smile on her lips. The touch is still muted, her legs lacking the muscle she’d incessantly worked on since before her abilities first manifested. 

__

It was a coping mechanism that now feels like a distant memory. One she could no longer rely on. 

__

For the time-being at least. She’s still got some hope left in the tank. She’s always been a fighter after all.

__

_Man, out of all the things I could’ve broken..._

__

She suddenly isn’t feeling in such a festive mood anymore. 

__

She gives her leg a squeeze and glances at Fowler. He cocks his head to the side and inches closer to her, face flush against her thigh.

__

Her eyes land on Quynh, Andy, Joe and the still mysterious (and god-awful dancer) Nico. 

__

It’s a weird-ass family she’s stumbled upon. 

__

It feels like home.

__

The family that turned its back on her stumbles back into the deepest, most forgotten corners of her mind. Where they belong. 

__

As she scratches the handsome fella, comfortingly leaning on her leg, she laughs. 

__

_Road gets tougher all the time, but you bet your ass I ain’t falling behind._

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you babes have an awesome week ahead of you!
> 
> Take care and hey, show all you favorite writers some love! It makes our days infinitely better, knowing we're having a positive impact on someone's life. 
> 
> Also, feel free to share your favorite fics/current obsession's/guilty pleasures down below! Never hurts to spread the gospel around this place. Tumblr's a busy place.


	12. Allure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Ohana - January 3rd, 2020 – 8:50 p.m._
> 
> Last night’s party having a sequel was heavily influenced by both Andy and Nile arguing that “no food gets left behind”, or something along those lines. His presence in it was not up for debate either. 
> 
> After a rather lazy day spent with Nico (which involved a substantial amount of cuddling, napping and getting tanned while Nico and Fowler chased one another to the point of exhaustion down by the beach), he finds himself back at square one. 
> 
> It’s another evening under a sea of stars. A lit torches, wooden floorboards glistening with sand, much less upbeat (and thankfully, quieter) music, kind of evening.
> 
> The company, at least for the next handful of songs, is also different from what he pictured in his mind. It's still deeply appreciated. He’d forgotten how much he enjoyed to dance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... remember I told you guys that things _might_ get spicy?
> 
> Heh. Funny how things turn out, huh? 
> 
> It's not explicit by any means, but, fair warning: There's DEFINITELY some action here. Sorry not sorry.
> 
> Also, trigger warning: When Quynh discusses her past, she _is_ refering to suicidal thoughts/attempts at taking her life. It's a rather subtle exploration of the subject, but I figured it was best to mention it, in case someone feels a little uncomfortable about it.

## Allure

_Ohana - January 3rd, 2020 – 8:50 p.m._

Last night’s party having a sequel was heavily influenced by both Andy and Nile arguing that “no food gets left behind”, or something along those lines. His presence in it was not up for debate either. 

After a rather lazy day spent with Nico (which involved a substantial amount of cuddling, napping and getting tanned while Nico and Fowler chased one another to the point of exhaustion down by the beach), he finds himself back at square one. 

It’s another evening under a sea of stars. A lit torches, wooden floorboards glistening with sand, much less upbeat (and thankfully, quieter) music, kind of evening.

The company, at least for the next handful of songs, is also different from what he pictured in his mind. It's still deeply appreciated. He’d forgotten how much he enjoyed to dance. 

Quynh’s arms are a comforting weight on his shoulders, his hands, resting on her waist.

His grip is firm, but in a different way than with Nico. His foothold isn’t what you might call unskilled when it comes to dancing, but it could easily fall in the clumsy category under closer inspection. He doesn’t get a chance to put this particular set of skills in practice as often as he’d like.

Quynh doesn’t seem to mind. 

\- You know, I think I see the appeal of settling down now – 

Quynh’s eyes are fond, surprise discreetly flashing across them.

\- What made you come around? –

\- Well, for one thing, I’d forgotten how fun parties can be – 

\- Told you. Company goes a long way in that regard – 

\- And dancing with someone who knows their way around the dancefloor is appreciated as well –

\- You can thank Andy for that – 

\- Who, coincidentally, taught me as well – 

\- _Ugh_. She really _can_ do **everything** – 

She twirls Quynh, her gracefulness enough to make a ballet-dancer’s ears grow red with furious jealousy. She pulls her back into his arms, when the song nudges him to do so. 

Whoever’s in charge of the music has got some enviable flexibility and range, not to mention a way of reading the crowd. The exuberant energy that’d been maintained quite steadily the previous night has now been effortlessly replaced by a mix of all-time classics, perfect for a more intimate kind of evening.

Despite the presence of cumbia, salsa and an overall delightful Latin flavor, the jazzy interludes and nostalgia trips induced by rock make for a perfectly balanced concert. The songs are often elegant and majestic in their orchestration, live variations that everyone is both familiar and more than willing to sing along to, despite the embarrassment that’d probably hold them back from doing so in a different context.

Quynh decides to test the waters.

_I guess Andy and me aren’t the only ones kicking the idea of living a normal, quieter life around._

\- Have you considered the possibility of taking it easy for a while? – 

\- How long are we talking about? – 

\- Don’t see why we need to put a time-limit on it – 

The word _vacation_ hasn’t been at the forefront of his mind in a **long** time.

The notion is not entirely foreign, but he’s having a hard time picturing it regardless.

\- I honestly don’t know what I’d do with such an indefinite amount of free time at my disposal –

\- That’s kind of the appeal, Johnny. We all need to kick back from time to time. Sip one too many margaritas. Spend more time in your underwear than usual - 

\- I’m more of a wine kind of guy – 

\- You always did strike me as a vaguely obnoxious kind of guy – 

He deadpans her smirk, good-naturedly.

\- What are _you_ into? _Beer_? – 

\- _Ugh_. Shit tastes like piss – 

\- Looks like it too – 

\- What the hell, right? Men seem to love it though. Really makes you wonder, huh? – 

Joe’s reminisces, mind connecting the dots.

He’s not entirely sure he wants to know why most men seem so drawn to it.

Some things in life are better left as mysteries.

They share a solid laugh, unconsciously leaning closer to the other.

\- All kidding aside though. When’s the last time you took things down a notch? –

_There’s a question I don’t ask myself often enough._

\- I can’t even recall – 

Quynh’s grimace has _yikes_ written all over it.

\- Never a good sign, handsome –

\- Been kind of caught up in work – 

\- Kind of a lame excuse, don't you think? Hasn't stopped Nico and me from spending every single Christmas and New Year’s away from this life of glamour and excitement that pays the bills – 

\- Is that why all four of us wound up here? – 

\- Amongst some other things – 

\- Was it you who sold Andy into the idea? – 

\- This was all her, actually -

\- I’m guessing it’s not your first time here – 

\- You’re on a roll, handsome – Joe’s lower lip compliments his smugness - More like fifth – 

\- At least there’s one thing where I’m ahead of you – 

\- Thought you said vacation wasn’t part of your vocabulary – 

\- I don’t... actually spend my time here _resting_ , per se. I help Andy out with all the administration, finances. I coordinate with the outpost over in Honolulu in terms of surveillance as well… - He shrugs – No rest for the wicked, I suppose - 

_I hadn’t realized how odd that is until now…_

The song playing in the background is what can only be described as country. It’s energetic, playful. Strangely catchy, too. There’s a guitar, playing tug-of-war with the piano and percussions. He can detect the faint contribution of bass, somewhere in the mix. An electric guitar joins the party soon enough.

Turns out country music is Quynh’s area of expertise, judging by how the reigns of the choreography are suddenly being supervised by her, for the most part.

Dancing’s never been his strong suit, but he sure as hell ain’t going to let her have all the fun.

As the deep voice fades into the chaperoning moonlight, a softer one takes up the mantle, easing them back into a leisurely rhythm.

\- Have you always been such a workaholic? –

\- You make it sound so dirty – 

\- Only if it’s an _all work and no play_ kind of situation. You clearly haven’t seen The Shining – 

\- I prefer the novel. And King wasn’t a fan of the film adaptation, by the way – 

\- Doesn’t make it any less good – 

\- I find your definition of _good_ to be _fascinating_ – 

\- Almost as fascinating as I find _your_ taste in literature – 

The following song has violin and accordion written in its DNA. A bizarre (and strongly effective) mix of melancholy and playfulness. The kind of song that screams frustration, disappointment and catharsis at an ex who’s better off as a distant memory, most likely waiting at the bottom of a bottle. 

\- So, what drives you to keep so busy? – 

The answer is easy enough to answer on the surface. It’s the explanation behind it he’s not so sure will be as straightforward.

\- It helps keep my mind off things – 

\- That I can certainly relate to – 

Her gaze wanders from his own, gesture not entirely intentional, seemingly. 

Joe finds the gesture comforting. Sincere. He can’t help but dig a little deeper.

\- The kind of things that keep you awake at night? – 

The music grows coincidentally somber, as if aware of their need to get some things off their respective chests.

_Fitting._

\- Not as often as they used to. But they can’t help but rear their ugly head in, every so often – 

\- Any tips you wouldn’t mind sharing? – 

Quynh’s silk-like touch is a captivating shade of winter, deep in contrast with his summer-like, rougher hands. Hers are smooth only in demeanor. Much to his surprise, they’re almost as calloused as his own.

\- I’m guessing you’re expecting something more elaborate than _keep moving forward_ –

He chuckles, genuinely curious to what she might be willing to share.

\- Preferably something more profound than that – 

She grows quiet, thoughtful; struggling to put her insight into words. She decides to share her train of thought, rather literally.

\- I was always on the move, back when I was younger – _AKA, a lifetime ago_ – Foster care can be a real bitch if you’re the kind of person who’d rather stay put and take things slow. You get used to it though. Made it my mission to keep all that anger and confusion to myself, for as long as I could. Until I didn’t - 

\- Boy, is that familiar - 

\- The being an orphan part? -

\- The anger coping mechanism part. I’m guessing it turned out as graceful as it did for me - 

\- If by graceful you mean… - 

\- A real fucking shitstorm –

\- Brevity really is the soul of wit – She sighs - Yeah. Could’ve definitely gone better – 

Quynh’s collectedness and suave way of taking life head-on keeps on getting more complex, the further she gets to know her.

A hardened shell, starting to crack under the nudging, curious pressure of an awfully similar one. 

They suddenly feel like old acquaintances, catching up like not a single day has passed since their begrudging goodbyes years prior.

\- Took me a while to get back on my feet after that – 

The night suddenly doesn’t feel as warm and cozy.

\- Meeting Nico felt like a curse at the time – She loses herself deeper into memory, allowing herself the catharsis of venting to Joe - Worked so hard to tie lose ends, only for this infuriating dumbass to barge into my life and… - _Wasn’t my time, I suppose_ \- He saved my life in more ways than one. Never asked for anything in return - 

\- He’s really is the best of the bunch, isn’t he?– 

\- I keep on telling him he’s on the wrong line of work. Says he won’t tap out until I do – 

\- And now you have – 

\- Got one last job to put in the can – 

\- You think he’ll want to step aside, once we’re done? –

_Does that stepping aside include me?_

\- Would _you_? – 

\- Wouldn’t know what to do if I did – I really fucking don’t - This life is all I know – 

_I’m starting to think it ain’t something to be proud of._

\- None of us do, darling. We can’t do this forever though – 

\- What’s next for you then? Can’t imagine you living a boring-ass life, just like that – 

\- Don't make it sound so dirty, Johnny – Joe huffs, amused - And I’ll have you know, I’m as lazy as they come. I’m just good at moving along with the flow. Pretending otherwise. Being an orphan? Mighty effective way of keeping you on your toes. Improvising is part of the job description. A necessity, rather than a choice – 

\- It sounds exhausting. Can’t say I envy you – 

\- I certainly don’t – 

\- I gotta say… you don’t… strike me as one to care much for appearances – 

\- That’s because I don’t. Again, lazy – 

\- You didn’t answer my question – 

\- It’s… not an easy one to answer – 

\- First thing that pops in your head – 

She licks her bottom lip, a thousand answers piling up on her mind.

She settles for one of the simple ones. The one that seems to encapsulate all the rest

\- I’d like to be somewhere quiet for a while. A long fucking while. Somewhere breezy and green. A farm? – 

\- You certainly got the money for it – 

She doesn’t deny it. She instead turns the spotlight back to Joe.

\- I can’t help but wonder what the mysterious Yusuf al-Kaysani does with all his savings? You don’t strike me as a reckless spender – 

\- Mama taught me well. Used to say something along the lines of: Treat yourself from time to time, but keep it humble, _nuri_ ***** – [ ***** my light ]

\- I’m assuming _nuri_ means devilishly handsome – 

\- Ha! Something like that – 

\- So, I _was_ in the ballpark – 

\- Sure. On a different stadium too – 

\- Seems some of Nico’s wit is starting to rub off on you. _Great_ –

_Some sarcasm to match my own. Lucky me._

He twists her around, raising her arm over her head. 

Their eye’s land on Nico and Andy’s haphazard, clumsy and wildly entertaining dance routine. 

Andy taught Joe to dance at a certain point ( _there was a fair share of eye-rolling, frustrated groans and cursing involved_ ), but seemingly Nico is being spared from the experience. She must have given up, once she realized he was keener on flaying his arms wildly and playfully twirling her around until she’s nauseous.

She seems to be having a blast. Nico somehow ends up wrapped in her arms, laughter escaping from her lips as a result.

\- I can’t help but feel like we don’t deserve him - 

\- You get used to the feeling after a while – 

As the song nears its bluegrass conclusion, waist-deep in cello, Andy nudges Nico’s body closer to the sand. Nico raises his leg dramatically as the song swells with an energetic banjo solo.

\- You should get back to your man, before Andy claims him for the next song – 

\- I don’t mind him dancing with Andy – 

\- That was my subtle way of telling you to strut your ass over to him so I can dance with my future wife – 

\- Bossy – 

\- Hey, spend long enough with a woman like her and it’s bound to happen – 

They join the cheers from the crowd as they slowly make their way over to the life of the party, still lost in their amusement, a handful of feet away.

\- So, what will it be then? – 

\- How do you mean? – 

\- What will you do, once you’re done giving migraines to the rich and mighty? – 

The final answer is still a convoluted mess in his mind, but Quynh’s humble goals have given him a nudge in the right direction.

\- I wouldn’t mind getting around to that novel I keep pushing back. And travelling just for the fun of it… it sounds mighty appealing – 

\- We talking casino nights in Monte Carlo and escaping on a stolen sportscar kind of travelling? Or..- 

Joe's smile is genuine. Shadows of uncertainty lingering, but finding themselves further pushed to the background. 

It's nice, for a change.

\- I’m aiming more for… 4 and a half-star Yelp review dinner’s, reading a good book with Nico in my arms... and spending an obscene amount of time in a jacuzzi most likely –

\- You know, I misjudged you – 

\- You did, huh? – 

\- Yeah. You’re just as lazy as I am – 

° ° °

_January 5th, 2020 – 9:20 a.m._

It only takes a couple of days for Joe to realize just how easily (and accurately) Quynh managed to read into him, once she gave her a chance to take a deeper sneak-peek into his psyche. 

Not only is he lazy, but Nico’s mannerisms and sense of humor are quickly (and rather effortlessly) becoming his own. 

Finishing the job they started back in Cancún has been relegated to a distant thought, submerged in a sea of annoyance, and compelling him to bring back a facet of his personality he thought long extinct:

Procrastination. 

The tips of Nico’s fingers brush his chest hair in a suave, deeply satisfying pace.

_I’m more inclined to blow off Andy and Quynh for breakfast than I care to admit._

He’s been awake for a solid hour now (sort of), but he yawns regardless, his warm morning breath sending a pleasant shiver through Nico’s autumn-like hair. 

(That’s how he decides to interpret the shuddering and appreciative hum escaping from Nico’s lips, at least).

Joe’s still debating whether the shade of Nico's hair qualifies as dark brown or golden. It depends on the lighting, it would seem. He’s had an overabundance of time (and close proximity to the man) to make his assessment. 

Right now, though…? He lifts a stray lock of hair for further inspection, Nico humming in contentment at the gesture. He blows at it playfully, breaking the reverie of tenderness they were cocooned in. Nico slaps him in the bridge of his pectoral and collarbone. He huffs in satisfaction.

He decides to break the silence, rather than keeping his thoughts all to himself, the way he usually does. Nico’s made it abundantly clear he’s more than willing to listen and follow through with a sarcastic, cocky or teasing remark. Every time.

He can’t see himself getting tired of this particular dynamic (out of the plethora they possess) anytime soon.

\- I could get used to waking up like this – 

Nico’s fingers jump back into routine, toying with his chest hair, absentmindedly. He circles his nipple - the touch as gentle as it curious - continuing its mission to memorize every inch of Joe’s dark skin, in moderate contrast with his olive complexion.

\- I mostly agree – 

Joe’s eyebrows give away his amusement.

_Fine. I’ll bite._

\- Mostly? – 

He can sense a smile growing in Nico’s lips on his skin. Either that, or he’s about to lick him.

Or bite him. The last two nights on this bed have been a rather enlightening experience for the both of them. Nico’s desire has a fair share of quirks, a seemingly never-ending list of mysteries he fully intends to explore in-depth. Turns out, he does as well. The more he learns, the more adamant he grows at the idea of leaving their room.

Eating and playing with Fowler (both on Nico’s request) are some notable incentives to do so. And sure, spending time with Nile, Quynh and Andy is nice enough, but he can’t bring himself to actively seek them out. 

They could always bring one of those mini-fridges up to their room. And they should probably leave the water in the tub rather than draining it. They’ve been using it rather often. 

_Andy’s eco-friendly mindset would **flip** if she found out._

\- Quynh was insistent on me not letting you lay on your ass too much. Something about _keeping you on your toes _and _not incentivizing your laziness_ – __

____

\- It was kind of _your_ idea to stay in bed for this long – 

____

\- And _you_ were more than happy to comply – 

____

\- You could’ve insisted – 

____

\- And _you_ could’ve resisted. We’re equally guilty here, hon– 

____

\- I’ll keep it in mind next time you try to seduce me into your lazy ways – 

____

\- How big of you – 

____

_Heh. **Big**. ___

______ _ _

Joe’s laughter is restrained, until it’s not.

______ _ _

He covers his mouth and looks away, struggling not to be _too_ immature. 

______ _ _

His trembling chest seems determined to call him out on his bullshit.

______ _ _

Nico looks up, deadpanning him once it clicks.

______ _ _

\- It’s like I’m dating a horny freshman – 

______ _ _

\- Didn’t hear you complain about it yesterday – 

______ _ _

Nico’s laughter echoes through his chest and the room.

______ _ _

_We still have plenty of endurance to go around, **clearly**._

______ _ _

\- Or the day before that, for that matter – 

______ _ _

Nico’s cheeks are doing marvels in emboldening Joe’s wit. He covers his face, in a weak effort of dissuade him from further making him blush.

______ _ _

__\- I’ve created a_ monster_ – 

____

Joe laughs, deciding it’s better to take that as a compliment.

____

\- Accountability is one way to my heart – 

____

\- Anything else I should add to the list? Might come in handy later – 

____

\- Hmn… coffee is up there too – 

____

\- Andy or Quynh-style? – 

____

\- I said _coffee_ – 

____

\- Oh. So, you’re _that_ kind of boyfriend – 

____

\- What’s that supposed to mean? –

____

\- _What_? – 

____

\- Fuck you – 

____

\- _Why_ is the idea of coffee with sugar _so_ offensive to you? –

____

\- It’s like… - Joe waves his hand, thinking of something equally repulsive, to his poor taste. He snaps his fingers once he arrives at an equally flawed and inaccurate line of thought - putting pineapple on pizza – 

____

\- You have _got_ to be shitting me – 

____

\- What? – 

____

\- Nothing – 

____

\- Oh, my _God_. Do you actually _like_ – Joe’s disgust finds itself present in every letter of the word like – that… **abomination**? – 

____

\- Did a slice of pizza cheat on you in the past or something? – 

____

\- You’re _gross_ –

____

\- Ha! Mighty rich coming from the guy who saw fit to fart… - 

____

\- **OH MY GOD, NICO** – 

____

\- … taking a shower – 

____

\- It was an accident! – 

____

\- I’m never letting that slide, by the way –

____

\- Yeah, well. What else is new? – 

____

\- You having poor taste in food, clearly – 

____

\- You’re so cute when you’re wrong –

____

Nico tickles him, sheets whispering as Joe’s limbs spasm as a result.

____

\- Shut up! –

____

\- FUCK – 

____

\- Fine, but you better make an effort this time around – 

____

Joe's eyes grow wide, secretly hopeful and delighted.

____

\- Wait. You mean… - 

____

Nico answers by straddling his hips, smirk and raised eyebrow in perfect sync with Joe’s arousal slowly growing more evident.

____

\- You got quite the appetite –

____

Nico leans forward, one hand landing softly next to Joe’s head, and the other sending sparks through his lover’s chest. It slides further down with unhurried, knowing playfulness. 

____

\- Think you can keep up? –

____

Joe’s blush is soon replaced by hunger, as insatiable and determined as Nico’s. His hands climb up to Nico’s hips, pulling at the waistband with curiosity.

____

He pushes past Nico’s hand, Nico pulling back with a grin, but allowing the gap between them to become nearly non-existent.

____

\- It’s you I’m not so sure can follow through, _darling_ – 

____

\- Is that so? – 

____

He tackles Nico, himself being the one casting his shadow and dominance over the other now. Nico bites his lip, legs climbing up to Joe’s lower back, pulling him closer into the spellbinding warmth between his thighs. 

____

Nico’s hands explore his torso when he reaches down to whisper in his ear.

____

\- I’m pretty sure – 

____

He somehow resists the temptation to place his tongue over it. For now. 

____

He’s never been opposed to building up… 

____

What’s the word?

____

\- You talk too much – 

____

He captures Nico’s lips, the collision being as heavenly and life-altering as the first time. 

____

Nico’s fingers leave kisses of fire, as they dance their way up to his neck. They never linger for too long. And they never cease to make the lust to grow tenfold.

____

Joe’s tongue begs for entrance, Nico smiling and wrapping his fingers through his hair as he opens up the gates.

____

The pressure of Nico’s legs wrapped tightly around him cause him to involuntarily seek for more friction, Nico rocking back and forth, in synch with his thrusts. They soon grow frantic, clumsy. 

____

_Perfect._

____

Nico twists their bodies until he’s back on top. Joe is barely able to catch his breath before Nico’s lips are back in their rightful place. 

____

His hands make a foolish effort of reaching upwards to Nico’s angel-like features. Nico doesn’t even open his eyes when he pushes his arms over his head.

____

_Fuck me. He really is a **boss**. _

____

One of Nico’s hands keep his own locked in place. Joe’s back arches forward, loving every second and inch of the restraint. Nico’s hand massages his chest, losing itself in the hair, sliding further and further down until Joe’s squirming in an ocean of pleasure. 

____

He moans into Nico’s mouth as his skilled fingers reach out, wrapped and tugging with just enough pressure to beckon him to come undone on the spot. Both Nico’s and his own fall victim to Nico’s grip, shortage of breath feeling equal parts excruciating and divine.

____

He’s at his mercy, unwilling and unable to do anything but lose himself in the bliss.

____

He wants to return the favor.

____

He needs to. 

____

\- You okay down there? – 

____

_Do you **seriously** expect me to form a coherent sentence right **now**?_

____

____

_\- You seem… - Nico leans forward, sinfully whispering into his ear – distracted –_

_____ _

He bites his earlobe, Joe’s whimper’s feeling as satisfying to himself as it does to Nico.

_____ _

\- You’re… fucking **killing** me here – 

_____ _

\- I can stop – 

_____ _

\- I want to return the fucking favor – 

_____ _

\- You curse a lot – 

_____ _

Fuck it. 

_____ _

He breaks past the iron-like grip, Nico’s complicit grin giving away how on board he is with the change of pace. 

_____ _

He wraps an arm around Nico’s back, twisting their agitated, soon-to-be sweaty bodies. He soon finds himself hovering over Nico, predator waiting to strike. 

_____ _

Only caveat being that his lover is just as fierce and territorial as himself.

_____ _

He stares deep into Nico’s emerald eyes, hungry and ecstasy written across his irises.

_____ _

\- I could write a novel out of your eyes – 

_____ _

Nico’s mile encourages him to take in the view. No rush. No pressure, other than the one their bodies pressed against each other are applying, or their lips desperately seeking one another.

_____ _

The backside of Joe’s hands is gentle, as it brushes against Nico’s cheek.

_____ _

\- They’re so haunting. So deep and so beautiful. You have no idea, do you? – 

_____ _

\- They’re quickly becoming my favorite feature, all the sudden – 

_____ _

His lips taste wonderful, the feeling strong and breathtaking, aching in his chest the same way a forest fire would.

_____ _

\- Your lips are so delightful and so perfect. I could taste them over – He emphasizes each following word with a kiss that lasts longer, and elicits an increasingly vocal response from Nico – and over – It’s Nico moaning into his mouth this time around – and over – The pressure is building up to the point of no return – and _over_ – 

_____ _

His fingers are as deft as Nico’s, if the pleasure escaping from his lips and the insistence of his body pressing against his own are anything to go by.

_____ _

\- You’re so fucking beautiful it should be considered a crime – 

_____ _

\- Don’t stop – 

_____ _

\- I can’t. Your lips taste too fucking good – 

_____ _

Nico’s touch is truly driving up the wall, in all the best ways. It’s overwhelming in a way that feels addictive. 

_____ _

\- And your body – _I could never get enough of it_ \- It’s beyond majestic, my love – 

_____ _

He takes his time, fingers dancing and skiing across Nico’s skin like a prayer, deliberate and glorious. 

_____ _

\- It tastes like paradise too – 

_____ _

His tongue is thorough, encouraged by Nico’s closed eyes, near silent cursing and celestial joy, written across his body language and adrift smile.

_____ _

\- **Fuck** , Joe –

_____ _

\- I can stop, if you want – 

_____ _

Nico’s eyes show a hint of resentment at the callback.

_____ _

\- Shut the fuck up and keep on… - He moans. Loudly. Obscenely enough for him to come close - _fuck_ – 

_____ _

_You said it, darling._

_____ _

Nico frantically pulls him up to his lips, once he feels the conclusion building up.

_____ _

Joe’s expectancy at the coming climax makes his touch more desperate. Pleading.

_____ _

He doesn’t want this to end. But he wants to make Nico feel good. 

_____ _

It’s a daunting endeavor.

_____ _

Nico’s moans fall in synchrony with his own, all sense of self-control being thrown out the window.

_____ _

Their sweat, heat and excitement all make for a symphony they’re both active voices in. 

_____ _

He can’t hold it any longer. 

_____ _

Their breath is shared. Their touch quickens the pace. 

_____ _

Their eyes remain closed throughout, mouths gasping for breath in contrast.

_____ _

It’s magical. 

_____ _

Nico is… _indescribable_. Par for the course.

_____ _

He’s everything he’s ever needed and more.

_____ _

_____ _

° ° °

_____ _

Their breaths have turned less agitated, given the handful of hours that’ve passed them by. Their heartbeats equally so. Nico’s eyes are closed. His own are inclined to do the same. They’re halfway there already.

_____ _

Nico’s slim body (in comparison to his broader, somewhat bulkier frame), is curled up on his side, limbs wrapped around him with a deeply satisfying modicum of possessiveness. His lips find themselves sunk in Nico’s golden hair (the sun is at its peak after all), tips of his fingers caressing the skin beneath it with reverence.

_____ _

He can’t bring himself to move even an inch. 

_____ _

Therefore, it’s only fair to admit that, yes. Quynh was unsurprisingly in the know:

_____ _

He really _is_ a lazy lover. 

_____ _

Guilty as charged.

_____ _

Only detail she failed to elaborate on is that he’s not opposed to putting that aside (for the most part), in order to have the privilege of witnessing this tired, blissful and juvenile smile on Nico’s face.

_____ _

_I should write a poem about it._

_____ _

As he and Nico fall in a euphoria-induced dormancy, a soft chuckle escapes from his lips, once he remembers the word he failed to identify during their encounter, which in turn will most definitely end up being the poem’s main driving emotion:

_____ _

_**Anticipation.** _

_____ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Official Soundtrack: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5XCYwLPOfycjimrdyTXyuE?si=caO6Blr7SFm2I2ypwggtsQ


	13. Security is a Myth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _January 6th, 2020 – 12:30 a.m._
> 
> _I don’t like this plan. In the slightest._
> 
> He turns to Joe, his stance and scowl making his distaste for it as evident as his own. 
> 
> _Regardless... I don't think we have much of a choice._
> 
> \- Hon, I know it sounds risky – 
> 
> \- You don’t say? – 
> 
> Nico’s face turns vaguely sour, exasperated at the sarcasm. Joe mouths a _sorry_ , looking up at Nico through his eyelashes. Nico rolls his eyes and looks away, waiting for Joe to reach out and make amends.
> 
> It takes less than five seconds for Joe’s hands to reach out towards his. He can’t help but look back at him smugly. Joe holds his gaze, squinting at the smugness, but accepting it as penance.
> 
> Quynh chimes in, a fair share of hesitation that matches Joe’s, but fully aware of Andy’s resolve to move on with the plan no matter what.
> 
> _Where she goes, I go. End of discussion._
> 
> \- It doesn’t change the fact that it sounds like our best bet –

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Put your seatbelts on. 
> 
> I don't think the gang's going to catch a break for a while.
> 
> I WANT THINGS TO GO BOOM-BOOM AND FOR MY BADASS LESBIANS AND GORGEOUS AF, DUMBASS BOYS TO KICK SOME ASS.

## Security is a Myth

_January 6th, 2020 – 12:30 a.m._

_I don’t like this plan. In the slightest._

He turns to Joe, his stance and scowl making his distaste for it as evident as his own. 

_Regardless... I don't think we have much of a choice._

\- Hon, I know it sounds risky – 

\- You don’t say? – 

Nico’s face turns vaguely sour, exasperated at the sarcasm. Joe mouths a _sorry_ , looking up at Nico through his eyelashes. Nico rolls his eyes and looks away, waiting for Joe to reach out and make amends.

It takes less than five seconds for Joe’s hands to reach out towards his. He can’t help but look back at him smugly. Joe holds his gaze, squinting at the smugness, but accepting it as penance.

Quynh chimes in, a fair share of hesitation that matches Joe’s, but fully aware of Andy’s resolve to move on with the plan no matter what.

_Where she goes, I go. End of discussion._

\- It doesn’t change the fact that it sounds like our best bet – 

Joe and Nico jump back into the conversation after their momentary departure, Joe starting to peel back on why he’s so adamant for the plan to be headed in this direction.

\- Which in turn makes it a _thousand_ times more infuriating – 

Nico’s hand wraps around Joe’s. He twists his hand so his palm is meeting Nico’s. 

_I’ve got a feeling we’ll be doing this anyway._

\- We’ll be fine, hon. I think we’ve made it abundantly clear we can handle ourselves in a fight – 

\- Yeah. Have a little faith, Johnny –

\- It’s not you guys I’m worried about – 

\- _Yeow_ – 

\- I mean… – 

\- You need to work on that phrasing, man – 

\- Thanks, Nile – 

\- She’s not wrong –

\- Can you all hear me out? – 

The group grows quiet, the tension in the air close to annihilating all trace of levity out from the air.

\- _Testy_ – 

\- I’m not questioning your competence. It’s the circumstances I’m not particularly thrilled about –

\- I won’t let anything happen to your man, if that’s what you’re worried about – 

\- It’s not about… – 

Nico’s questioning look makes him roll his eyes.

\- Really? – 

\- Darling, don’t take this the wrong way… - 

Nile’s hands rest on the back of her head, as she singsongs in a low voice.

\- Phrasing… - 

Joe throws his hands up, patience running on fumes.

\- FUCK. Would you just… - He places his hands over his mouth before he goes on - chill for a minute and let me explain? – 

Andy crosses her arms and glances over at Quynh. She mouths wow, Quynh twisting her mouth in agreement. 

\- I know we’ve handled equally dicey situations. If not worse – 

\- _Definitely_ worse – 

Joe extends his hand towards Quynh, in agreement.

\- So, no. I’m not doubting that we can pull of a stunt like this, even if we’re working separately – 

Nico raises his finger, wanting to clarify something.

\- Which, I’m not thrilled about, either – 

Andy’s deadpan has no shortage of amusement, but due to the underlying stiffness, it comes across as somewhat cold.

\- Don’t encourage him, Nico – 

Joe finishes, once silence is regained.

\- Point is… I can’t be the only one that feels like something’s off here – 

He looks at the group, questioning and unyielding. For the time being, at least.

It’s a hunch. Maybe a stupid one. He’s got nothing tangible to back it up with after all. But it’s there. And to his experience, he’s usually in the ballpark when this unpleasant sensation makes itself present in the pit of his stomach. 

Something feels… off. And he doesn’t like it one bit.

Andy finally speaks up, a sense of finality permeating her thoughts.

\- Joe, I trust your instincts. Sometimes more than I trust my own. But this is our best shot. We let this opportunity slip and we won’t get our hands on those files – 

Quynh sighs, stating something that they’re all deeply aware of.

\- And if we don’t take hold of that evidence, we can kiss sending that fucker to jail for the rest of his life goodbye - 

He closes his eyes, once his fears are voiced out in the open. 

Andy eye's make a round through the group. 

\- So, now it’s just a matter of deciding who teams up with who – 

Nile speaks up, changing the subject rather abruptly.

\- Isn’t it whom? – 

\- Grammar police is on shift – 

She raises her arms, defensive.

\- Hey, I’m not sure myself… – 

Joe stands, unwilling to discuss what Andy’s so determined to elaborate on, his mind, set on stalling for as long as he can. Nico’s eyes follow him as he heads over to the handrail. Joe turns back once he reaches it, eyes focused on Andy.

\- How long do you think we have? – 

Nile bites her lip. Quynh sighs. Andy sinks deeper into her seat, biting her nail as she works on an estimate. It doesn’t take long. She raises her hand in defeat.

\- I’d give it a day before any of the affected parties make a move – 

Nico leans forward, hands rubbing against the other as he wonders aloud a doubt Joe shares. 

\- Who should we expect to join the fray? – 

Joe sighs in relief mentally, seeing Andy’s attention wander. Quynh starts enlisting the most likely attendees in the meantime.

\- We know he’s had dealings with the Dragons, back in the Malaysia job – 

\- And we know said dealings could have gone _way_ better – 

Nico and Joe scoff at Quynh’s sarcasm. 

_We **might** have had something to do with that._

\- Was that the first or second time we wound up there? – 

Andy’s memory remains as lightning fast as usual.

\- First. Second time was that mess with Castillo, back in the casino – 

Nico grins, amused at the accidental rhyme. Nile notices, eyes narrowing, but laughing under her breath as well.

\- That temper really _did_ end up being his downfall after all – 

Andy rolls her eyes humorously at Quynh’s reminder.

\- Add the Jalisco Cartel to the guest list. They weren’t happy about that mess in Morelia a couple years back - 

\- Oh, yeah… there’s a chance they might want to have a chat with him about it – 

Nile laughs, effortlessly turning the sound into a cough. Nico crosses his arms.

\- They just _had_ to barge in and ruin the festival – 

Unlike Nico, Nile looks back fondly on the year. She was still in the thick of the game back then.

\- 2015 was a _fine_ year for film – 

Nico and Nile lean closer to the other, most likely to debate just how accurate Nile’s statement is.

Joe’s eyes meet Andy’s. Quynh licks her lips, eyeing Nile. Only one still in the dark as to why the air suddenly feels like a vacuum is Nico.

Joe spares Andy from having to speak into existence the last party worth adding to the list.

\- Booker is sure to want his slice of the cake as well – 

Nile’s stance turns rigid, to those paying attention. Nico sees her hands opening and closing a handful of times (a now customary way to help her keep it cool) but doesn’t comment on it. 

Joe’s inclined to do his breathing ritual too. Andy looks almost as on-edge as himself.

Nico, in deep contrast, looks unsure.

\- _Le Livre_? – He turns to Quynh - I thought he’d been out it for a while now – 

\- In paper. He’s got a reputation to uphold after all – 

Despite not being a fan of the man, Nile still keeps it nonchalant.

\- Good old _philanthropist by day, black market dealer by night_ duality. _Classic_ –

Joe can’t say he’s still fond of they man, but he figures it’s better for everyone to be on the same page as to what the man's capable off. And why they decided to cut ties with him in the first place

\- He sure knows how to roll with the punches – 

Nile speaks, leaving it abundantly clear they’re done discussing him for the moment.

\- And stab people in the back without calling it rain –

Fowler’s ears are down, his usual panting uncharacteristically absent; his jaw, closed. He turns to Andy, gentle whimper encouraging her to ease his nerves by scratching the back of his ears.

Quynh drives the conversation back into focus, despite Joe’s desire to keep drifting off until they call the whole thing off.

_Hey, a man can dream._

\- Well, we can count off the Dragons. They’re unlikely to join the party given the change in government. They’ll probably be too busy striking a deal with the Premier of the State Council –

Andy looks at Quynh, as lost as 90% of the group when it comes to the Chinese political structure. Nico has been filled in already, after a movie marathon meant to “broaden his blockbuster-oriented ( _you saw the 19th Avengers film **three** times in theaters, but decided to skip If Beale Street Could Talk and Roma? The hell is wrong with you? _) taste in film”, back in 2018.__

____

\- I’ll explain it later – 

____

Nico turns to Joe.

____

\- You think the Templar’s might have a stake in this? – 

____

Andy remains laser-focused on the task at hand, answering as quickly as last time. 

____

\- They’ve got their hands full too. That whole Subject 17 controversy isn’t going away anytime soon – 

____

Joe raises his voice, vainly attempting to steer the discussion away from having to tackle the mission separately for as long as he can.

____

\- They make some _legit_ games, though – 

____

Quynh scoffs.

____

\- Yeah, remind me to tell you _how_ they got around to making them so realistic. You’ll feel differently about them once we’ve had _that_ conversation –

____

Andy stands. Joe adds one last thing before they start working the specifics of the plan. Or rather, _plans_.

____

\- As if the harassment allegations weren’t bad enough… – 

____

Andy raises her voice, palms of her hands now resting on the table.

____

\- So, how should we tackle this? – 

____

Quynh can’t help but try and keep the amusement in the discussion alive. Flickering, hanging on by a thread, but still alive and kicking.

____

\- I’m guessing we’re done pretending like we’re not a team of four now? – 

____

\- We are. I was actually going to suggest mixing things up –

____

Nico raises an eyebrow.

____

\- “Mixing things up”, as in… - 

____

\- As in, you and I pay Merrick a visit in that lovely Panamanian prison, while Joe and Quynh make their way to merry-old London - 

____

The group grows quiet.

____

Nile twists her mouth as she glances back at Joe, still resting his back on the handrail, and still between Nico and Nile from Andy’s perspective. Nico closes his eyes, fearing a heated debate on the horizon. Fowler moves up to settle between Quynh and Nile, realizing Andy is too busy to give him the attention he desires.

____

It’s not that they haven’t been forced to work with anyone other than their usual partners in the past. Improvisation goes hand in hand with theft. Joe could easily count up to half a dozen times where he’s wound up working side by side with Quynh, rather than Andy. The amount of times he’s ended up covering Nico’s fine ass is twice as high. Doesn’t make the cooperation being part of the plan from the get-go any less bizarre. 

____

__It’s viable. He trusts Quynh, despite her curious, prying nature. As for Nico… his dreams have had him as an active participant (in a_ wide_ variety of contexts), even prior to Málaga. Trust isn’t the problem here.

_So why do I have such a bad feeling about this?_

He turns his head and finds Nico lost in thought, but unquestionably on board with the game plan. 

And then, it clicks.

_Of course._

\- That might work – 

_Over my dead, rotting **corpse**._

\- The **hell** it will – 

Andy looks unimpressed. Nile breathes deeply as she meets Quynh’s smirk, giving her the finger and reaching out for her wallet.

\- What’s _that_ supposed to mean? – 

Joe pretends not to notice Quynh’s amusement.

His anger is a ticking bomb.

Andy hesitates before speaking up, realizing how thin the ice is. She decides to hold the thought.

_This better be good, Joe._

\- It means that I’m teaming up with you and _we_ are headed to Panama – Nico’s eyes remain wide and focused on him as he turns to Andy – You and Quynh are better suited for the break in over in London – 

Quynh can’t bring herself to try and find any faults with his logic, once she ponders on the notion for a bit. She turns to Andy.

\- Well, I’m not opposed to taking the stealth approach over the assault one - _And you **can** phase through walls, if things get hairy_ -Think we can handle this one, babe? – 

Andy scoffs.

\- Can we handle this one… – 

Quynh looks over at Joe. 

\- We’re on board – She salutes – _captain_ – 

Joe gives her the finger, mentally. He settles for shaking his head, unamused, back in reality.

\- At ease, _soldier_ – 

Nico’s voice is tight, in a way that makes his throat get tangled in a knot.

\- Why are we splitting up like this again? – 

Nile twists her head, looking at Joe questioningly. Quynh smiles as she leans forward. Andy shrugs when Joe meets her eyes.

\- Well… - He coughs – it makes more sense for two men to be in a prison, rather than two women – 

Nile’s smugness makes him want to punch a wall. 

\- That’s a sexist way to go about it – 

\- Nile – 

\- Relax, man – 

Nico expression is one of bitter satisfaction. Something about the scrutiny he’s subjecting him too is both arousing and infuriating. He crosses his arms before speaking, his inviting nod feeling all but

\- Go on – 

He struggles to avoid any sign of hesitation, as his eyes stay level with Nico’s.

\- You and I are better suited to deal with things if they go south. Which they almost _definitely_ will – 

_What’s with the cold, detached look?_

\- And this has _nothing_ to do with wanting to keep an eye on me, right? – 

He inches closer towards Nico, unwavering, mind set on convincing him to drop his foolish attempt to dissuade him. Or rather, challenge him. 

This doesn’t seem to be just about the plan, per se. Nico seems determined to prove something. What that is… he’s starting to feel doubtful it’ll be something pleasant.

\- Why would I want to keep an eye on you? – 

\- You’ve made it abundantly clear you love to be… - Nico hesitates before using the phrase "on top of things", wishing to avoid Joe’s mind to wander in a spicy direction, rather than the serious one he’s aiming for - in control – 

Joe’s guard seems to falter, albeit slightly. 

_No, hon. This isn’t an elaborate ploy to get you all worked up._

_This conversation has been a long time coming, whether you like it or not._

Quynh clears her throat. Obnoxiously loudly. 

Nile’s voice is gentle, but unmistakably loud enough for all to hear.

\- Get a room – 

Joe feels flustered, a slight blush crawling up his cheeks.

\- You make it sound like a bad thing… – 

Nico’s face remains cold.

\- Well, it wouldn’t be. If you weren’t so arrogant about it – 

Nico’s voice lacks the playfulness he wishes the statement had. He’s _not_ in a joking mood, clearly. 

His determination and demeanor are all starting to make sense.

_So **that’s** what this is about._

Nile’s lips are tight as she looks at Quynh, laughter all but imminent.

Andy’s eyes are focused on Nico, pride swelling up in her chest.

_Glad to know you're not a pushover._

\- You think that's what this is about? _Egotism_? – 

His voice is somewhat mocking in tone. He doesn’t even try to hold the emotion back.

\- Oh, I’m sure of it –

\- Why is me being so arrogant relevant now? –

\- Because I feel like I deserve to know if you’re planning to pull off another stunt, like the one you did back in Cancún – 

_Yeah. This isn’t going well at all._

\- If I was headed over to London with Andy, would you be worried? Or would you be pissed that you can’t keep tabs on me? – 

\- Do you really think _now’s_ a good time to have this conversation? - 

\- This isn’t the first time talking with you has been an issue – 

The silence is deafening. Heavy. Oppressing.

It’s all wrong. 

\- Nico – 

\- Doing this mission together is going to turn out to be a real fucking shitshow unless you trust me – 

\- Are you fucking kidding me? – 

He turns his head, only to see Andy, Quynh and Nile already out of earshot, walking uphill towards the cafeteria.

_When the **hell** did they get up?_

Nico sighs.

Joe follows suit. 

Nico’s voice loses part of its bite. It sounds deflated. Exhausted.

\- Do you, trust me? – 

\- Are you going to believe a word that comes out of my mouth, if I tell you the truth? – 

\- Just answer the question –

\- What did I do to make you feel like I didn’t trust you? – 

\- Do you want me to make a list? – 

\- I should be able to procure some pen and paper, if it helps – 

Nico stands. His grips on the handrail tightens, sudden rush of shock and uncertainty punching him square in the face. 

Nico’s hand rubs at his chin as he paces back and forth in front of him.

\- You know, that I _look_ like a huge clumsy dumbass doesn’t mean that I am – 

He inches closer to providing a sarcastic remark, only for his common sense to help him keep the fury at bay. For now.

\- You have a tendency to push my buttons, and it’s not always amusing – 

\- I could say the same about you – 

\- I’ve never pointed a gun to your face, hon. Call me crazy, but I think that’s a point in my favor – 

\- And… the opposite for me. I told you I was sorry about that – 

\- And I accepted that apology. So I’m sorry for bringing that up again. It was a cheap shot – 

\- Nico, what is this about. Really – 

Nico’s hands rest on his hips, eyes wandering into the distance. 

He walks up to him, his hands now gripping the cold, metallic tube Joe’s hands are clinging to. 

\- Do you remember that time in Lisbon? – 

\- Had to shower a handful of times afterwards, so yes. _Vividly_ – 

_The stench still haunts me to this day._

\- Do you _also_ remember the discussion we had? – 

\- I remember it... being a rather heated one – 

He sighs, memory not being entirely pleasant. 

\- I was out of line – 

\- I’m sensing a but – 

\- Not sure I want to speak it into existence – 

\- Joe – 

\- You were being obstinate – 

\- What could have driven me to be so stubborn, I wonder – 

\- Can we drop the condescending tone? – 

\- I don't know, can we? - He rolls his eyes - You were being an asshole, Joe – _In… and out_ \- And I kept the hurt to myself because we were on the clock. You question my competence, I call you out on how much of a prick you are. It’s a back and forth that we couldn’t help but fall into. Sometimes the venom in your words wasn't one I could so easily dismiss –

_We. But... granted. I tend to be the biggest prick, most of the time._

\- Back in Vienna – 

\- Nico, do we really need to… - 

\- It was luck what kept that bomb from going off, Joe. I’m a patient person. Sometimes more than I should be – His voice grows somber, its cadence making an unpleasant shiver to cross the length of his arms and the back of his neck – A lot of people could have gotten hurt. And the blame would have been mine. And your attitude? It wasn’t helpful in the slightest – 

His eyes remain fixated on Nico’s. 

He hates the feeling growing in the pit of his stomach. It’s like vomit. Repulsive, sour and, if he’s been totally honest with himself, justified. 

\- If things do go south in Panama… – 

\- Which they most likely will… - 

\- …I need to be sure that you’ll keep your temper under control – 

_Easier said than done, darling._

\- It’s going to be a stressful situation – 

\- It’s going to be stressful for us both. If I can promise you to keep my cool (which I will), I want to make sure that you are willing to do the same – 

\- I do trust you – 

\- Well, here’s your chance to make it abundantly clear – 

\- And how exactly do I do that? – 

Much to his surprise, the challenge in his voice feels neutered. There’s a hint of hesitation and apprehension that Nico doesn’t miss.

\- The same way I do it – Nico’s hand lands on his chest, soothing – You take a deep breath, you focus on the task at hand - Nico’s grip acquires a tinge of firmness that makes the following "recommendation" seem somewhat cautionary – And you keep your cool, for both our sakes – 

\- That’s easier said than done – 

\- No one likes making mistakes, hon. And no one appreciates being called out so blatantly when you fuck things up either – 

The blush in his cheeks feels driven mostly by remorse and humiliation, rather than anger. It’s not exactly pleasant, but it feels like a wake-up call that’d been simmering under the surface for a while. Like ripping off a band-aid, and breathing out in a mix of relief and irritation. 

He feels more of the former, rather than the latter, as he loses himself in the warmth and persuasiveness of Nico’s piercing, green eyes.

\- We’ll be alright Joe – 

_Will we though?_

\- _No_ – Nico’s eyes turn questioning, but remain civil, waiting for him to elaborate - I will be. Same as every fucking time. What if things _do_ go south? What if I’m not there to… 

\- To do what? – 

Nico’s steely, cold gaze makes him unwilling to finish his sentence. 

\- Joe, you can’t stop every bullet – 

\- If it means none of them get to hit you, I’m willing to give it a shot – 

\- I’m not – 

\- Nico… - 

\- _Stop_. We’re not playing the game if we’ll be playing under those rules – 

\- Why not? – 

\- Because you already scared the _shit_ out of me back in Cancún, Joe! And back in Málaga? I could go on for _miles_ enlisting the number of times you’ve scared the living crap out of me. I’d rather take a barrage of bullets wherever those fuckers see fit, rather than see you… - The tightness in Nico’s voice and the anguish hiding in his irises makes his hands reach out for his cheek, in what he hopes is a soothing manner – you have no idea how _terrifying_ it is to see you that way. Do you? – 

He tries to put himself in Nico’s place for a second. He doesn’t like the images that flash through his mind in the process.

\- I... try not to think about it too much – 

\- Well, _my_ sorry ass gets some rather vivid, fucked-up nightmares out of it. So no, Joe. No more meat-shield _bullshit_ or playing hero from here on out – 

The authority in his voice, much like Andy, leaves no room for questioning or dissuading.

\- That sounds an awful lot like an order – 

Nico doesn’t let himself be distracted by his attempt at humor.

\- Please, Joe –

The memory of a very similar scenario just a handful of days prior is brought back to the forefront of his mind.

He brings their foreheads together, Nico’s hands tugging at the collar of his shirt as he breathes Joe in, in an effort to ground himself.

\- I won’t let anything happen to you – 

Nico remains quiet, patient. 

He breathes, making up his mind to avoid putting Nico in such a frightening situation if he can help it. To keep his impulsiveness levels tamer than usual. No one should have to experience the crippling dread he has seemingly been put through. If the brief glimpse of it was unpleasant enough… the least he can do is try.

\- And I’ll do my best not to put you in such a position again. I’m sorry for that too – 

Nico can’t bring himself to pull away from the comfort of Joe’s words in his ear or the Sun-like warmth of his chest. Not yet.

\- This should be a pretty straightforward op, Joe. No fuss, no bullshit. Easy in, easy out –

\- _Should_ – 

\- Fair – He voices one of his remaining concerns about the plan out loud - Are we positive the fucker’s being held up down there? I mean, _Panama_? It’s not like they don’t have any prisons back in Mexico – 

\- After news hit of his… shenanigans, there wasn’t much he could do to keep the sharks at bay. He didn’t even get a chance to testify, once all the affected parties were in the loop –

\- But still, why risk taking him down to… - 

\- He’s a rich fuck. But he ain’t _that_ smart. He swindled folks he should have left better off alone. They would’ve eaten him alive back in their turf – 

\- Literally? – 

\- Uh… - 

_I’ve heard stories. Stories I’m not crazy about sharing._

_Not even a bit._

Nico’s mouths a “wow” and drops the subject.

\- Yeah... let's just say he should’ve known better than to mess with the Dragons – 

\- Or the Jalisco cartel. _Clearly_ –

\- Or the… - 

\- Ok, we could go on for a while – 

\- Touché –

Nico turns around in Joe’s arms, back now pressed against his chest, Joe’s lips resting on his collarbone. 

\- I won’t let them hurt you – 

\- Well, you _do_ have my back – 

It takes Joe a moment to register the pun.

He groans once it lands.

\- As far as puns go… that one was _awful_ – 

Nico sniffs.

\- You didn’t brush your teeth, did you? – 

\- Fuck you - 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys are, like, supposed to listen to the Soundtrack. You know that, right?
> 
> (it's fabulous. Pinky swear)
> 
> https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5XCYwLPOfycjimrdyTXyuE


	14. Hades

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Royal Lancaster Hotel, Park Suite 528 – London – January 8th, 2020_
> 
> \- Hey, babe? - 
> 
> Quynh’s head takes a peek from the bathroom door, her hand leaning over the frame. She takes the toothbrush out of her mouth, the word “what” (presumably) coming out of her mint-smelling mouth. 
> 
> \- This is a nice room – 
> 
> \- Uh-huh? – 
> 
> \- Great view – 
> 
> \- Huh – 
> 
> \- Lots of space, too –
> 
> Quynh disappears for a few seconds as Andy drops her bag on the bed. Her hand ghosts the bedsheet, lavender and silk, a coincidental reminder of Quynh’s perfume and skin.
> 
> \- Something on your mind? – 
> 
> \- You do know we’re only staying for one night, right? – 
> 
> \- You’re _such_ a cheapskate –

## Hades

_Royal Lancaster Hotel, Park Suite 528 – London – January 8th, 2020_

\- Hey, babe? - 

Quynh’s head takes a peek from the bathroom door, her hand leaning over the frame. She takes the toothbrush out of her mouth, the word “what” (presumably) coming out of her mint-smelling mouth. 

\- This is a nice room – 

\- Uh-huh? – 

\- Great view – 

\- Huh – 

\- Lots of space, too –

Quynh disappears for a few seconds as Andy drops her bag on the bed. Her hand ghosts the bedsheet, lavender and silk, a coincidental reminder of Quynh’s perfume and skin.

\- Something on your mind? – 

\- You do know we’re only staying for one night, right? – 

\- You’re _such_ a cheapskate – 

\- And you’re the literal opposite – 

\- We only live once, doll – 

\- Doesn’t mean we have to spend $1,000 dollars on a hotel room – 

\- It was $945 – Andy’s not sure whether to scream or laugh at the revelation – Hey, the breakfast is included – She slides back into the bathroom, an afterthought escaping from her lips in a more secretive tone - plus the, uh… $75 for the… – 

She coughs, spitting into the sink to buy herself some time.

\- For what? The caviar that’s on its way up? –

Quynh sashay’s out from the (obscenely large) bathroom, nodding to the basket next to the flower vase. There’s a bottle of Champagne, swimming in a sea of chocolates and rose petals (smiling at her with smugness that matches Quynh’s).

\- We’re having separate savings accounts from now on - 

\- You were always the dramatic one – 

\- I would have settled for a bottle of red – 

\- No. You would have settled for having dinner on a convenience store and sleeping under a bench, back at the airport – 

\- **One** time that happened... – 

_It’s not like I overbooked the goddamn flight._

\- If you’re the one doing the finances from now on, it won’t be the last –

\- Who’s being dramatic now? –

Quynh pokes Andy’s ribs

\- Fair warning: You’re staying the hell away from the honeymoon plans - 

\- $75 dollars for champagne, babe. Can you even imagine what Joe and Nico must be dealing with right now, in comparison? – 

\- Oh, please. They’re going to a prison, not Hell. They’re probably having fun – 

° ° °

_La Gran Joya Penitentiary Center, Panama -_

\- It smells like literal fucking _feces_ in this place – 

_Based on what we saw from the outside…_

\- Yeah… don’t touch anything. Just in case – 

He makes a turn, following his otherwise unquestionably perfect and mesmerizing lover, dressed in quite possibly the dullest imaginable outfit in history. 

_Never been a fan of the color gray, but whoever was in charge of the clothing department in this hellhole seems to be crazy about it._

The claustrophobia-inducing transfer loop bleeds into the processing corridor, in the most jarring and disorienting way imaginable. Maximum security block lies a building away still. 

\- You _are_ aware I’m wearing handcuffs – 

Joe’s arms shift uncomfortably against at his now limited mobility. Nico swears he can sense the tension, radiating from his broad shoulders.

\- I am. And let me tell you – He leans closer to Joe’s ear, once he makes sure the coast is relatively clear – I kind of like the idea of you being so restrained – 

Joe fights against the blush on his cheeks, to no avail. 

The disguise-acquiring process went surprisingly smoothly. Suspiciously so, but he decided to keep that assessment to himself. It’s best if at least one of the two remains with their head clear. Relatively. Chances are Nico is just as on edge as himself, but he’s usually better at pretending otherwise.

Should their cover be blown… he focuses on his breathing, for his sake. And Nico’s, by extension.

_Keep your cool. Keep it together._

Best not trouble himself about it just yet. As Nico so smugly and confidently affirmed with a kiss: _Worrying just means you suffer twice, hon._

A pair of guards tip their caps at his lover, Nico nodding back and shoving Joe forward with convincing cruelty and disinterest. He trips on his own feet, just in case. Once they’re out of earshot he turns his head back, unable to keep a sly grin from spreading across his face.

\- I’ll keep it mind, next time we… - 

They both stumble, Joe failing to keep his balance. Nico’s hand grabs onto his shoulder to keep him upright, as the deafening crack blasts their eardrums and makes the ground shake.

The sudden urge to ask Nico whether it’s appropriate for him to worry now, is cut short by the high ceiling and overwhelming vastness of the corridor to disappear from sight. The snap that usually betrays Nico’s abilities is lost in the chaos they abandon.

As he takes in his new surroundings, a hoarse, cursing and unknown voice forces him to focus back in the place Nico blinked them to.

\- DOWN! – 

His face and chest smash against the ground, two near flawlessly synchronized gunshots above him further disorienting and setting his nerves into overdrive. 

He turns back, awkward and rushed. His short-lived panic is eased at the sight of Nico, alive and unscathed. 

Nico’s eyes make the panic rev up its engines.

\- Darling? – 

He coughs as he stands up, his gaze frozen on Nico’s shocked and unmoving body.

\- Babe – 

He curses as he reaches to caress Nico’s cheeks, his arms straining against the handcuffs.

\- **Nico** – 

\- He’s dead – 

\- Are you ok? – 

\- That’s… a word for it. But… _fuck_ – 

He turns back, the shades of crimson dripping from the surveillance monitors sending a gradual shiver up his spine.

That he’s a killer, doesn’t mean that gets a kick out of it. Or that shit like this is easily brushed aside. Or that Nico’s response to his first kill is anything but entirely justified. 

\- Nico… listen. Nico. Look at me –

It shatters him to witness the turmoil reflected in his eyes. It’s an all too familiar emotion he’s gone to the greatest lengths to keep locked away under lock and key. Out of sight, never out of mind. And now it’s Nico’s turn to do the same.

\- I’m sorry. You were defending yourself. It was either you or him – 

\- I feel sick – 

\- You have every right to. Just… focus on me, ok? Get me out of these handcuffs, and we’ll take it from there – 

Nico's eyes pierce into his own, frantically searching for something. He hopes that whatever sense of comfort he’s clearly aching for is crystal clear in his jet-black gaze.

Nico brings their foreheads together for a second before pulling away and reaching for his back pocket. He circles him and frees his hands, smashing the metal restraints on the window pane across the room. 

Joe crosses the room in a handful of strides, eyes dashing across the monitors, fingers clumsily stumbling through the keys. Nico’s hand lands on his shoulders. He moves back, leaving the tech wizardry to the pro and headed for the armory tucked between the desk and door leading to the visitor’s center, atrium and main entrance.

They’re headed in the opposite direction.

\- Who are we dealing with here, babe? - 

He busies himself stocking up while Nico’s finger’s glide across the keyboard with enviable smoothness. 

He tucks a grenade in his belt. 

_Better safe than sorry._

Nico’s response is tight and professional.

\- Can’t say. Perimeter cameras are down. Most cell blocks too – 

He walks up to Nico, fingers pulling at the slide of the 9 mm. he just picked up. 

\- Do we have eyes on the prize? – 

\- Hold up… - He groans – Down too. Whoever’s behind this isn’t messing around – 

\- Good thing neither are we – 

\- Yeah – 

He places his hand on the back of Nico’s head, stroking at his hair as he leans in to kiss his cheek. 

\- You ok to keep going? – 

\- I don’t think we have a choice, hon – 

The words “we do, actually” get caught up in his throat. 

When he meets Nico’s eyes, he’s gifted with a look that’s both appreciative and determined. There are traces of reluctance, clearly being shoved to the sidelines.

\- Andy and Quynh are already in London – 

Nico’s smile is sad and agreeing in nature.

\- So, the only way is forward now – 

\- I’ve got your back, babe – 

The commotion behind the door is shortly followed by the door getting kicked open, hinges whining and threatening to give in to defeat after years of misuse.

The snap is less surprising this time around. It still makes him grunt once they land on their feet, in an effort to regain his bearings faster and keep his balance. 

_You start getting used to the feeling after a while._

The room is familiar. The smell, for some reason, too. The idea the room seems to be aiming for is sanitation, while the practice screams of a haphazard and careless implementation. 

\- Laundry room? Why are we back here? – 

Nico waves his hand from his hunched position, using his knees as support, heaviness of the consecutive jumps clearly starting to take their toll.

\- We should… we should be able to circle back to the main cell block through the service tunnels -

He crosses the room, Joe following suit. 

\- Why didn’t we cut through here in the first place? – 

\- Because the smell of feces is bad enough upstairs – He crouches, motioning Joe to help him lift the grate – And I wanted to avoid (fuck this shit’s heavy) _this_ if we could sneak in with disguises – 

They both take a minute to catch their breath, looking down at the stairs and darkness below with disgust and reluctance. 

Nico motions his hand downwards, encouraging.

\- After you – 

\- Heh. And they say romance is dead? –

° ° °

_Downtown London, Merrick & Lewis– Way past Joe’s bedtime_

\- You’ve got to admit the chocolate is - Quynh licks her finger, emphasizing the delightful experience that the $75 champagne was accompanied with - pretty damn good – 

\- For $75 I’d expect nothing less than scrumptious - Quynh’s smile entices her to let it go ( _you know the lyrics, doll. Don’t leave me hanging_ ) – but then again I haven’t even tried them, so who knows. They very well may be – 

\- Here – 

She snatches the extravagant sweet out of Quynh’s fingers with her teeth, once she deftly unwraps one and raises it to her lips.

\- Shift’s changing –

Outside, a trio of guards wave back lazily, the group of unfortunate souls entering the building through a side door dismissing the gesture cordially, as much as their slumped shoulders and bags under their eyes allows them. One of the latter guards give the former the finger. A woman on the receiving end shouts something back, laughter echoing through the silent avenue, midnight allure and quietude being regained shortly after. The concrete glistens as the light drizzle continues its somber march across the city. Good old quiet before the storm. As Nile would say: _Classic_.

\- Should we wait a little while longer? Any updates from the boys? – 

Andy taps the display of the table, making sure the Joe and Nico's alert didn’t pass by unnoticed. Lock screen remains unfazed and unchanged, ever since Nico confirmed they were kicking things off on their end. 

Quynh reclines back on the seat, stretching as much as the constricted space in the car allows her. It’s a waiting game, until they receive Joe and Nico’s all-clear, as well as the dataset that’ll get them past the server’s bio-encryption. 

_Whatever happened to using a safe with a straightforward dial combination? Learned to crack those open back when I was… 13? Haven’t had many chances to put that particular set of skills to work in a while._

\- No point in rushing in, hoping the info will drop in halfway through – 

\- How long has there been radio silence on their end? – 

\- Clocking in at… 45 minutes. Give or take. Should hear from them before the 2-hour mark –

\- Scale of 1 to 10… – 

\- Oh, boy – 

\- … how likely do you think chances are for things to get… shall we say noisy, over with the boys? –

\- With their luck? – Andy snorts – They probably didn’t make it past the front gate without a riot. Or a fire – 

\- Man, Vienna was a fun one – Andy looks at her with amused disbelief – Fire hazard and risk of third-degree burns aside – 

\- I’m worried our honeymoon is going to end up being on an active volcano – 

\- Wedding photos would be _legit_ , though – 

The sarcasm in her voice is more akin to honey, than venom.

\- Oh, yeah. Lit as Hell – 

It takes a beat before the pun is registered and embraced wholeheartedly by Quynh. Her laughter forces her hands to reach up to her chest and stomach, in an effort (a failed one) to keep the volume down. 

The satisfaction and pride, blossoming withing Andy’s chest, feel well-deserved.

_Hope those two dumbasses are having as much fun as we are._

° ° °

_A marginally less fun (and poorly lit) place, southwest._

\- Ok, _why_ is the smell of feces stronger up there than down here? –

\- After a while you just start to embrace the mysteries of life without thinking about them too much, darling – 

\- Your optimism has _the_ weirdest timing. Ever – 

\- It adds to my charm –

\- Well, duh. But still. Weird – 

Joe stops as he reaches the last in a series of staircases leading back up to the prison. The way forward and past it is their (hopefully still viable) escape route: an older, abandoned section of the prison that according to their research was last utilized by the Spaniards, back in… 

It was a long fucking time ago.

Joe probably remembers the exact date, given the permanent, raging hard-on he seems to have for history. But hey, his enthusiasm for it is contagious, to be fair. All those nights back in Hawaii, listening to him endearingly ramble on and on (and on) about the Gunsway ( _it’s “Ganj-i-Sawai”, darling. Gunsway is a rather obnoxious term that only further cements the anglicization process for all those lazy-ass americans…_ ) Heist, and its seemingly years-ahead-of-its-time logistics, was only one of the many (my man can hold a conversation alright) historical events and phenomena their late-night conversations ended up circling back to. 

That and how disgusting instant coffee, pineapple on pizza and meat-based foods are. 

That his future husband is a breathtakingly intelligent man, isn’t mutually exclusive with him having an insultingly short-sighted taste when it comes to food.

\- We’ve made it – 

\- He’s over on cell… four-nine… six…something, right? –

Joe’s hand stops when it comes in contact with the cool, rusted surface of the ladder. His expression turns irked at the touch. Nico twists his mouth, shuddering at the seeming roughness and humidity he’ll soon have to subject himself to, when he climbs up after Joe. 

_This has tetanus written all over it._

\- You know, I’m shocked you don’t know this stuff – 

\- There was definitely a four in there, somewhere –

\- _0451_. But I guess one-out-of-four is better than none -

\- Shut up – 

\- Be sure to stick close by – He looks down to Nico, the level of teasing in his voice tempting Nico to give him the finger for his upcoming ingenuity - Wouldn’t want you to extract the voice, retinal and fingerprint data out of the wrong guy – 

\- You’re real lucky you’re handsome – 

They reach the top of the ladder with nothing more than non-existent exhaustion and no traces of infection. As Joe slowly pushes and slides the grate out of the way, Nico takes out the gun. He bites his lip, apprehension and conflict all but invisible to a stranger.

\- Babe –

Nico’s emeralds come back into focus, using Joe’s eyes as an anchor. 

\- How you holding up? – 

\- I’m in a sewer, trying not to think to much about the fact that I murdered someone point blank not 15 minutes ago – He breathes – I’ve been better – 

\- I’ve got your back, alright? – He accepts Joe’s comfort, warmth and the confidence in his gaze like his emotional stability depends on it. Which, surprise: It does - We’ll be out of here in not time – 

\- The sooner the better – 

\- Let’s get to it then – 

Once they’re both on their feet, he immediately turns his back to Joe, guarding his fine ass and ears on alert. It’d be a thousand times more useful (and much less infuriating) if the prison wasn’t on such a hectic, frenzied state. He can hear gunshots in the distance. And they still don’t know what other party might have burst in, seeking the same man they’re after. 

_I could so easily freak out right now._

\- If they get to him before we do… - 

\- The sooner we could get out of here – 

Joe presses his back against the wall, peeking against the corner while Nico covers his 6 o’clock and left flank.

\- Tempting… - Joe rounds the corner, Nico following suit. Their pace has quickened, without realizing it - but I’d rather see him behind bars for the rest of his life –

\- With no money left on his bank account to bail him out – 

\- Yep. That’d be preferable – 

\- Should be up this way –

_Should?_

They climb up the stairs until they reach the third floor, anxiousness building up to the point where Nico decides to comment on it. 

\- We should have bumped into someone by now – 

\- I was hoping part of my… - 

He pauses as he reaches the top of the stairs, holding his hand up. 

Nico's grip tightens around the gun.

\- Hear something? – 

\- I was kind of expecting someone to cut in, you know? Make it all the more ironic – 

\- Heh. Bet you a hundred bucks you will get interrupted by guards in less than 3 minutes time – 

\- Oh, you’re on. You pessimistic, gorgeous son of a … - 

The gunshots start. Because of course they do.

They crouch, sides pressed to the mold-infested columns framing the walkway directly in front of the final set of stairs, where the gunshots are coming from. They face each other from their respective stone pillars, waiting for the magazines to run out of ammo before trying to retaliate. 

_I WAS FUCKING KIDDING!_

Joe’s thoughts carry a similar volume.

_A HUNDRED FUCKING DOLLARS?_

The stone cracks as the bullets collide and penetrate it. They do so with embarrassing ease, speaking volumes of the financing available for the shit hole they’re trapped in.

Nico attempts to speak over the noise, element of surprise and stealth an unavailable option now.

\- Where the **fuck** is he?! – 

Joe nods towards Nico’s back, raising his voice.

\- End of the corridor, past the checkpoint –

\- We still need a way past it –

He fires blindly around the corner. Nico twists his mouth at the sound of bodies hitting the ground, mixed with the incessant gunshots crumbling their cover spot. 

_Yeah, this cover spot ain't gonna fly_

\- We need to take care of these assholes first - 

\- Got a head count? – 

\- I think we’re dealing with a fuck-ton of them – 

Nico scowls. 

His eyes grow wide as the corridor behind Nico becomes swarming with guards, weapons at the ready.

He hardens his skin, muscles burning with adrenaline and deep in contrast with the glistening, ice-cold sensation spreading from his fingertips all the way down to his toes.

Nico blinks out of sight with a snap. 

His hand instinctively reaches up to shield his face, as the bullets start to rain in his direction. /

He rolls away from the column, pressing his back to the wall opposite to the stairs, all the while working up a strategy other than rhino-ing his way through the guards. 

_Although, come to think of it...?_

The ballad of bullets originating from the corridor loses its rhythm and consistency, a serious of grunts and pained gasps disrupting the flow of the song. The source of the dissonance becomes instantly clear, once he detects a pattern: faint finger-snapping clicks, followed shortly after by cursing and the unmistakable sound of hand-to-hand combat, reaching its mark with presumable grace and swiftness.

The walkway (and the guards, starting to cross its length, in an effort to flank the pair) becomes his next target. 

He takes one look at Nico, brawling his way through the guards in the far end of the corridor.

He does his breathing ritual.

_He can handle it_

His hand reaches out to the grenade in his back pocket (on his right cheek), only for a stroke of genius to slap him across the face. 

_Rhino my way through walkway. Save grenade for later._

The bullets falter as he starts rushing towards them. His annoyance at the needle-like sensation urges him to dash faster towards the guards. The commotion is now being led by gasps and angry, confused shouting, rather than gunfire.

Once he reaches an optimal position he takes a leap, kick coming in contact with one of the guards. The only thing more impactful than the sound of his foot colliding against the man’s chest, is the way the man flies backwards, with enough force to hit the guard behind him, and what seems like the force of a speeding car. 

They collide and break the metal door of the guard overlook off its hinges.

_Might have gotten a little bit too excited._

Nico is down to three guards, having made sure work, out of the other four. He sees Joe leap and the painful display that follows.

He’s not sure whether to feel proud, impressed or terrified.

_That couldn’t have been pleasant._

His skull is violently (and so fucking painfully) jostled aside, as a baton manages to sneak up and come in contact with his cheek. It’s enough to make tears want to burst out of his eyes and for his vision and balance to become compromised.

_Neither was that._

His frustration and years of receiving similar displays of brute disregard for his physical wellbeing compel him to focus back on his own battle. He grunts, pulling his fists up to protect his face, fury driving him to dive back in and beat the living crap out of the bastard who’s approaching him (yet again) with the baton.

_You asked for it._

The guard swings while the other two stand back. His reflexes are slower, strength of the hit being redirected towards the railing with inefficiency that makes him grunt out loud.

_That one’s going to hurt like fucking **Hell** tomorrow._

He keeps the guard’s arm and weapon pressed against the railing. His fist collides with the man’s jaw. He keeps the streak by going for the ribs next. The man breaks free. Nico twists his body in a circular motion, leg gaining altitude halfway through, finishing the combo by having the man crash against one of the cell doors. He slides down in a way he would consider comical, if the other two guards didn’t start rushing towards him in order to avenge their fallen comrade.

He spits the blood on his mouth at the baton bastard, meeting the remaining guards head on.

He sluggishly casts the fastest guard with the strength of his own body. He manages to dodge the second guard’s fist by an inch, twisting the guard’s arm and positioning himself behind him. He sweeps the man off his feet with enough strength for the man to do a flip and smash against the ground on his face. The other guard, now back on his feet, approaches him with enough hesitation to seal his fate. 

_At least put up a fight, man._

He deflects the man’s swinging fists with his forearms. He hammers the man’s ears with the palms of his hands, with enough force to disorient and send him stumbling back. He bumps into the railing. And then he falls over it.

_**SHIT!** _

He dives, hand reaching the man’s collar just in time. The man’s hand latches on to his own, latching on for dear life. Literally. He motions the man backwards to help him gain momentum. Understanding flashes across the man’s eyes as he catches up and dives forward landing on the second floor with a thud. 

\- Throwing the guard off the railing was a bit overkill, in my opinion – 

Joe's hand lands on his shoulder. He's still gasping for breath after having his fun with his own set of guards.

\- Oh, I’m sorry. Is that guy you _freight-trained_ still alive? – 

\- Is the man you pushed off a _third floor_ still alive? – 

Joe leans over the railing, fearing the worst. He smacks him on the shoulder.

\- He’s down on the second floor. And by the way, my guy got off from our encounter with a fear of heights. Yours probably ended up with a few broken ribs – 

\- Yeah. I might have overdone it a little bit – 

\- Just a bit – 

\- But hey – He flips the grenade up in the air, catching it on its way down - I think I got a way past the checkpoint –

\- Tempting… –

Nico crouches towards the guard he kicked into the cell door, checking his pockets until he hits the jackpot. He waves the security card at Joe.

\- But how about we leave the explosions for the way out? – 

\- You’re no fun – 

\- HA! - 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll have to losen up on the "weekly update" scheme I've been holding together this long. So sorry babes! Thesis, final projects and exams are driving me up the FUCKING WALL. Hope y'all doing alright out there despite everything. (don't forge to vote!)
> 
> This was the most fun chapter I've writen so far, but I'll let you be the judges of that. 
> 
> This is basically Side A to the whole Prison Break/Break-In sequence. Side B will be more focused on my girls. They pop up in this chapter, but this one is more focused on Joe and Nico's dynamic when tackling a job as allies, rather than "enemies".
> 
> Hope you had fun with this chapter!


	15. What I Left Behind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Merrick and Lewis – London – January 9th, 2020 – 12:30 a.m (GMT)_
> 
> The guard scratches his poorly-shaved facial hair, absentmindedly. His coffee has long gone cold. He’s too caught up on his book to notice. 
> 
> His drifting mind registers the sound of steps, but fails to connect the dots. His eyes barely leave the page when he speaks up. 
> 
> \- Stop messing about and… - 
> 
> The man’s eyes grow wide, consciousness slipping away as his head is knocked forward in a rather jarring and off-putting motion, no object or person seemingly being responsible for the knockout blow. The man’s head smacks against the desk, coffee cup trembling, but remaining in place after silence once again establishes its rule over the lobby area and atrium.
> 
> A USB drive is detected in the desktop. The mouse and keyboards start to click and tap, as if by magic. 
> 
> \- You’re up, doll –

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You're going to **hate** me for this.
> 
> _Warnings: Some depictions of violence in the latter half of the chapter. Blood, death, blade-related. Be cautious if you find this kind of elements troublesome._

## What I Left Behind

_Merrick and Lewis – London – January 9th, 2020 – 12:30 a.m (GMT)_

The guard scratches his poorly-shaved facial hair, absentmindedly. His coffee has long gone cold. He’s too caught up on his book to notice. 

His drifting mind registers the sound of steps, but fails to connect the dots. His eyes barely leave the page when he speaks up. 

\- Stop messing about and… - 

The man’s eyes grow wide, consciousness slipping away as his head is knocked forward in a rather jarring and off-putting motion, no object or person seemingly being responsible for the knockout blow. The man’s head smacks against the desk, coffee cup trembling, but remaining in place after silence once again establishes its rule over the lobby area and atrium.

A USB drive is detected in the desktop. The mouse and keyboards start to click and tap, as if by magic. 

\- You’re up, doll – 

A modest collection of windows pop up in the desktop, lines of code and multiple exe. files running in the background, playing tug-of-war with the admirable (but ultimately, incompetent) firewall and security protocols in place.

Quynh hears Andy scoff through the comms.

_\- I could do this in my sleep –_

She eyes the dexterity and efficiency with which Andy is sifting her way into the system (remotely) with satisfaction. 

\- It’s like they want you to make them look bad – 

_\- This might actually turn out to be a cakewalk after all –_

\- Let’s not count our chickens until they’re in the barn – 

Andy’s laughter makes a smile to pull at the edges of her lips, eyes rolling for good measure.

_\- Who still says that? –_

\- Your future wife, clearly – 

Quynh raises her eyebrow as the silence on Andy’s comms prolongs itself.

She then _clucks_. 

Quynh’s laughter is cut short by herself, but not quickly enough for it to fill the atrium with its dulcet nature for a handful of seconds. 

_\- So much for subtlety –_

\- Yeah, well: Fuck stealth – 

_\- You’ve been in the clear for the past 15 seconds, by the way –_

Quynh becomes visible, a muted, billowing curtain-like swish accompanying the action. 

\- I still can’t believe you did that – 

_\- You’re the one always joking around on the job, babe. Can’t let you have **all** the fun –_

\- Get your fine ass over and we can keep the party going – 

_\- My fine ass is standing by at the maintenance door, because **someone** decided to close it on their way in – _

\- Wonder who that was – 

_\- Babe –_

\- It’s not like you _need_ to use the door in the first place – 

_\- Oh. Right –_

\- Did you… forget you can phase through walls? – 

The beat of silence that follows is telling enough.

Andy pfts, unconvincingly to Quynh’s trained ear.

_\- Of course not –_

Quynh’s head turns sideways. 

\- Sure – 

_\- Fuck you –_

Quynh clucks in response.

° ° °

_Maximum Security Ward – La Gran Joya Penitentiary Center – 7:41 p.m. (EST)_

Nico dismisses Andy’s alert on his wristwatch, a satisfied grin reaching to the sides of his cheeks.

\- They’re in – 

\- Let’s get the _hell_ out of this place then – 

Joe knocks Merrick out with deliberate malice, still infuriated by the punch he received on the jaw on their way in to his cell. Or rather, **suite** , as Nico so entusiastically phrased it when they carelessly waltzed in: ( _Look, hon! Bastard's got his own 65" and everything!_ ).

_Well, have fun rotting in jail for the rest of your life, you entitled fuck._

The man loses consciousness, his collar still held tight in Joe’s grip. He releases him, body plummeting to the ground.

Nico approaches Joe, unable to call him out on his behavior. He stares down at Merrick. The memory of his touchy-feely attitude towards Andy back in Cancún angered him just as much as it did Joe and Quynh.

_Serves you right._

The commotion outside continues to grow in volume.

His hand reaches up to Joe’s cheek, caressing the point of impact. Joe winces, but melts into the softness anyway. A short-lived moment of sweetness amidst the chaos waiting outside. 

Nico sighs as he drops his hand.

\- We can’t just leave him here – 

Joe’s turns to him, confusion and displeasure swimming in his eyes. 

\- Like _hel_ l we can’t – 

\- The whole point of - He gestures his hand to their surroundings, overwhelmed - _this_ was to make sure he stays locked up. Not tortured by a bunch of sadistic fucks – 

\- He’s not exactly a saint –

\- We’re no better than they are if we leave him to the sharks –

The air grows tense, Nico’s resolve to the right thing, being met head-on by Joe’s determination to minimize risks on their end.

Joe’s voice is an incongruous, heartbreaking mix of obstinacy and imploring. It’s parched, deep down, fully aware that he’s playing a losing game.

\- This wasn’t part of the plan - 

\- It’s the right thing to do – 

Joe groans out, frustration, stress and conflict all but having a ball in his mind.

\- I don’t give a fuck what the right thing to do is! This piece of shit has done much worse, and you know it! – 

_If something, anything, happens to you..._

Nico remains silent, undiscouraged. He looks down to Merrick. He looks back up to Joe. 

\- I’ve got enough guilt to go around as it is. I don’t feel like adding this to the list – 

_Whoever’s on their way here, they’re not slowing down._

Their eyes duel, Joe’s conscience jumping in and favoring Nico’s posture.

_Fine. Compromise it is._

\- If we get caught, you blink your ass out of here – 

_Even if it means leaving me behind._

\- I blink our ass out of here – 

Joe kneels down, pulling Merrick’s body over his shoulder.

_Entitled and heavy._

_Fan-fucking-tastic._

° ° °

_Service elevator, going up – London_

\- Any activity up there? – 

Andy taps at her wrist, holo-display coming to life with a fade-in whistle. She swipes at it with a finger and a contagious amount of uncertainty, unsure whether she wants to find some activity in the surveillance feed or not.

\- _None_ –

Andy meets Quynh’s skepticism with complimentary suspicion.

_Our luck had to run out eventually._

\- Think we’ll have a welcoming committee? – 

Andy licks her lips, glancing back at the display before closing her fist around it, as if trying to catch it. The light fades with a whisper-like buzz.

_I hate being wrong, but I wouldn’t mind having my first time right about now._

\- We just might. Wouldn’t be our first time putting our faith on smoke and mirrors though– 

\- Maybe we should move on to plan B – 

Andy sighs, disbelief crystal clear.

_We’ve talked about this, babe…_

\- **Split up**? Are you out of your mind? If they’re already aware of our presence… - 

\- We’re an easier target all bundled up together – 

Andy’s counter is all too familiar.

\- If for some reason comms are compromised, we’ll be running around blind, worried sick that something happened to the other –

\- Optimism, babe – 

\- And we still haven't considered the possibility of security being _much_ tighter on this set of floors, in particular – 

\- That’s… the opposite of what I was aiming for – 

\- Quynh – 

\- If they’re waiting for us up there, we split. If not, we stick together – 

\- _Quynh_ –

\- Too late – 

The elevator slides open with an obnoxious whirr that Quynh rolls her eyes at.

_Well, that wasn’t useful at all._

The light of the elevator bleeds into the corridor, the never-ending atrium reaching up to the floor they’re cautiously entering (75), and higher up ( _how big is this goddamn place, anyway?_ ). A series of walkways intersect one over the another through means of their shadows, their difference in height and angles enough to make a free-running enthusiast blush. They are stylish contraptions of glass and metal; a vertigo-inducing nightmare at worst, an enticing vista that cries out in style and sophistication as a best-case-scenario. Abstract, minimalistic architecture swirls around the walkways like a rollercoaster, reflecting the throbbing neon lights on the outside of the building.

Despite the sleekness of it all, Andy can’t help but feel like’s she’s locked herself up on a cage. A pretty one, but constricting in nature, only accentuated by the stress of walking into it willingly, unsure what might be lurking around in its deceptive, admittedly eye-catching confines.

\- Server room? – 

Quynh taps at her wrist, holo-display hovering on her right arm, gun pointed dead-ahead with the other one. They step out once Andy gives an all-clear wave, their left and right flank secured.

\- Pulse readings say… left – They walk down the corridor, atrium on their 3’o clock and a row of conference rooms on the opposite side – Server’s up the stairs – Andy looks up and to the right, a flight of stairs embedded against a large wall, leading up to the upper floors - on the left again, and past a security checkpoint – 

\- Got it – Andy looks down, cursing once the initial shock of the glass floor passes – How are you, uh… how you holding up? – 

Quynh eyes are focused upwards, covering their backside to make sure they aren’t flanked. She doesn’t miss Andy’s hesitation, but remains focused on her task. 

For now.

\- Something wrong? – 

\- You tell me – Andy braces for impact - The floor might not be to your liking – 

Andy slows down to a crawl, stopping altogether, closing one eye and face twisting sympathetically once she detects Quynh’s reaction.

\- **SON OF A BITCH** – 

Quynh presses her back to one of the office’s wall-to-wall windows, face stiffly focusing in the opposite direction of the floor and her hands (and gun) pressed up to her chest. She keeps her eyes open, labored breaths beckoning Andy to approach her. When she speaks, she does so calmly, hands reaching up to Quynh’s shoulders. Quynh flinches at the touch, enough to break Andy’s heart ten ways to Sunday.

\- Babe. Eyes on me – 

\- Are you **fucking kidding me** with this place…? - 

\- You’re ok, alright? I’ve got you – 

Quynh’s eyes turn frantic, wide as a plate. The color on her face seems to have fallen down the lobby.

\- _How fucking high up are we?_ –

\- Keep your head up, follow my lead and we’re set – 

Quynh's back is slowly but surely relaxing. Her voice remains strained, but much less panicked.

\- Easy for you to say – 

\- Babe, just focus. Breathe – She nods forward, until Quynh does so - Stick close. I’ll cover our asses. You lead us upstairs – 

\- Ok… that shouldn’t be so… - Quynh’s eyes wander to the left (Andy’s right), panic sneaking back into the party - Oh, for fuck’s sake, **WHY THE FUCK ARE THE STAIRS MADE OUT OF GLASS TOO?!** – 

\- You know, it’d be a real shame if stealth was of the essence –

\- Real funny – 

\- Almost as much as you, but not quite – Andy’s hand reaches up to her cheek, patting with gentleness, and encouraging her to get a move on - Now come on – Quynh groans through pursed lips, resisting Andy’s pull for a second before pushing her fear down to the sidelines and taking the lead - Eyes up. Server room. _Go_ – 

° ° °

_Cell Block A, en route to Processing Corridor – Panama_

Joe provides cover fire as Nico and Merrick rush across the length of the corridor, desperately seeking any piece of cover sturdy enough to stop the bullets flying in their direction.

_Should have **probably** considered an alternative exit, in hindsight._

When the reload-induced lull in the gunfight is over, Nico darts to the right, pulling Merrick by the collar, dragging him down to the floor and against the pillar. 

Joe ends up on the opposite end of the corridor, back pressed against the concrete, panting and eyes focused on Nico.

The gunfire stops. 

He reacts just in time, crossing his arms over his head, katana lodging in the space where his arms intersect. The nails-on-the-chalkboard hiss makes his eyes close. The blade and the force of his attacker slam his body against the wall behind him. 

\- **HEY!** – 

Nico’s voice wakes him from his daze, sudden urge of adrenaline coursing through his veins as he realizes he’s the only one from the pair that can pull of a stunt like this, and come out unscathed.

He pushes his and the attacker’s bodies away from the wall, towards the center of the corridor, twisting his arms with the strength of his upper body. The blade breaks in half, both himself and the Dragon rolling sideways to break the fall and get back on their feet in haste.

The Dragon grunts as he lurches towards him, ornamented, one of his crimson daggers leading the charge. He reacts just in time, shoving the arm out of the way. The dagger in the opposite hand dives for his ribs, colliding with his hardened skin, sliding across it with a shrill cry. The flash of shock in the Dragon is enough for Joe’s knee to fly up, seeking the Dragon’s jaw. The Dragon vaults backwards, one foot using Joe’s thigh as its launching point, the other foot colliding with Joe’s iron-like jaw as the attacker somersault’s backwards. 

The Dragon lands on his feet, relief and cockiness evaporating as a finger-snapping sound on his left flank makes him turn his head. His alertness is too little too late, Nico’s arm colliding across his chest while his foot sweeps the ground off from the Dragon’s feet. The Dragon latches to Nico’s arm on his way down, both plummeting to the ground. 

The Dragon rolls backwards and on his feet, Joe tackling the man resentfully as soon as the man's up on his feet. The man flies backwards as Joe's forearms come in contact with his chest, back crashing against the pillar with a satisfying, albeit revolting, crack.

He doesn’t get back up.

Nico’s calls out to him from the ground, pained, and resigning to stand up on his own.

\- That wasn’t _so_ bad – 

Joe helps Nico back up on his feet, bodies soon in close proximity, hands still clasped together.

Joe nods at the Dragon, still wallowing in pain, unable to move as gracefully as he was just 30 seconds ago.

\- He might disagree once he stands back up – 

\- If he can _still_ stand up after this. You know, sometimes I get the feeling that you get off on … - 

Nico collapses as Merrick’s punch hits him on the back of the head. 

_**YOU ENTITLED PIECE OF SHIT!** _

Joe’s fury dissuades Merrick from attacking him as well, eyes growing wide. He stumbles on his own foot, body making an effort to rush in the opposite direction while his head remains locked in Joe’s menacing approach.

He doesn’t see the Dragon behind him.

The katana bursts out of his chest with a sickening slash. Blood spurts out from his mouth, eyes empty, hands aimlessly reaching for the blade.

Joe allows a small gasp to escape from his lips, overwhelmed by the suddenness with which Merrick’s life has been taken away. So easily. Perhaps deserved, many times over. But nauseating nevertheless. 

The Dragon pulls the blade out, thrusting it sideways to help clear out the blood. He (or is it she? They?) then slides the blade through the slit between his forearm and bicep, nonchalance and elegant personified.

The second Dragon pounces from the side, blade aimed for his skull. Joe redirects the blade and Dragon towards the one in front of them, now charging with the same goal in mind as the first attacker.

The second dragon breaks free, rolling out of the way. The Merrick-killing Dragon reaches him, feet swinging towards Joe’s upper body with enviable (downright terrifying) speed. He manages to stop it mid-air with his forearm, hand quickly doing a 180° turn to grasp the Dragon's leg out of the brawl's equation. 

The clumsier Dragon tries to join back to the encounter, only to be energetically (and seemingly, painfully) punched to the ground by Nico. His lover glances at him for a split second on his small hike to the second Dragon, providing him with a wink clouded in frustration and anger. 

The Dragon uses Joe’s grip as a counterweight, lifting his body in an attempt to use his free foot to coup de grace his sorry-ass. 

He clenches, focusing his adrenaline and raising his other forearm to shield his head, the Dragon’s leg colliding with his concrete-like limb with a thud that becomes infinitely gratifying when the Dragon grunts in pain at the collision. The Dragon’s body begins its descent towards the ground. Joe lets his knee fly upwards. His metallic-like skin crashes against the Dragon’s chest with a crunch, Dragon’s body somersaulting involuntarily due to the momentum.

Nico’s finishing combo on the Dragon he’s handling is less striking, although no less painful. He manages to sneak a strike to the Dragon’s throat. Knee to the stomach, air escaping from the Dragon’s mouth with a harsh sense of finality. The finishing blow is Nico’s body doing a 360° spin, foot rocketing to the Dragon’s jaw. The ensuing crash is then followed by the unconscious man’s body collapsing on the pool of blood surrounding Merrick’s body.

Their panting is as cathartic as it is amusing.

\- That could’ve gone better – 

\- We are still alive. In my book, it doesn’t get any better than that – 

\- Fair enough – 

Nico’s efforts to keep his gaze as far away from Merrick’s corpse don’t go unnoticed.

\- At least we’re getting payed – 

\- Your sense of humor is _the_ definition of dark – 

Joe looks down to Merrick, tempted to show Nico just how black his jabs can get when his heart is in it.

_Eh… maybe some other time._

\- I don’t have the energy to freak you out _that_ much right now… so let’s just focus on bolting out of here instead – 

Nico muses on it, nodding his head, exhaustion keeping him stuck to his knees for just a little while longer.

\- Fair deal – 

Joe meets Nico’s raised palm with his own, clapping sound echoing victoriously across the processing corridor.

Then, a second explosion blasts their bodies off from the ground, consciousness slipping away as the pain and deafness become intermixed with a blurry vision and an unwanted trip through the air, minds struggling to make sense of the chaos.

° ° °

_This is why we have trust issues – London_

\- Any day now would be nice, babe – 

\- You’re more than free to take over and figure this shit out, _sweetums_ – 

Andy takes one peek at the monitor, the reason why Quynh’s struggling as much as she is becoming painfully evident. She grimaces and whistles, empathetic.

\- Never mind – 

The glacial, strangely smug (and admittedly, seductive) AI construct ones again raises its voice. Quynh’s shoulders tense up further. Andy turns around, searching for the well-hidden speakers.

\- _Warning. Unauthorized access to the mainframe, in progress_ – 

\- I didn’t ask for your opinion, you bitch – 

\- _The use of vulgar vocabulary is unnecessary. Please stand by while security personnel…_ –

\- You go ahead and kiss the darkest part of my Vietnamese… - 

\- Babe – 

\- Right. That spot's reserved just for you – 

\- Oh my God? – 

\- _This is your final warning. Please, step aside from the console and await further instructions from security personnel_ –

\- Yo. Lights out, Siri – 

Quynh’s finger hovers over the final key, the mainframe’s defenses all but extinct.

\- _I kindly request you to go and fuck… _-__

____

The burst of static from the speakers makes Andy sigh in relief, Quynh slamming her fist over the keyboard with gratification and pure, unadulterated joy.

____

\- Can you _believe_ the mouth on that lady? – 

____

\- _Someone_ hasn't gotten laid in a while – 

____

\- Ha! – 

____

They step out of the server vault, each clearing a corner, nodding to confirm.

____

\- So, next stop would be the dickhead’s office – 

____

\- Which way? – 

____

Andy’s holo-display lights up as they start walking down the hallway.

____

\- Up. You know, it’s nice for a change for a job to go so… – 

____

The laser grid comes to life with a disheartening buzz. It whispers on its indifferent, silent approach. The shiver crawling down Andy’s spine makes her freeze in place.

____

\- **BABE!** – 

____

____

Quynh’s voice forces her back to reality, survival instinct mixed with dread bringing her back to her senses.

____

She hugs Quynh to her body and jumps towards the wall, body shedding its corporeity along with Quynh’s. They phase through the wall. Shen then remembers what’s waiting on the opposite side. 

____

The freefall is thankfully cut short rather swiftly. Their bodies collide with the staircase, glass groaning at the point of impact. Their pain stops them from moving out of the way in time. The glass gives in under Andy’s weight. 

____

Quynh’s hand grasps her own, the other latching to the railing, knuckles turning white. Quynh’s eyes remain closed as she focuses all her strength on lifting her back up to relative safety. 

____

The guards step out of the elevator. The click of the safety resonates in Andy’s ears, despite the hectic struggle for her life.

____

\- **SWING ME OVER!** –

____

Quynh’s eyes open, instantly finding and focusing on the walkway down below (hopefully), within Andy’s reach. 

____

Her vertigo and anxiety force her heart to beat at a thousand beats per minute, control of the situation a ridiculous notion no longer in play.

____

The guards shout, some rushing in their direction, rest staying behind. Taking aim. 

____

\- **FUCK!** – 

____

She swings Andy on the opposite direction. Andy’s feet boost off from the wall. Quynh’s arm screams in pain as the broken glass cuts into it. She lets go, just as Andy’s momentum feels right. She then stumbles back, rolling down the stairs. She’s got enough sense to curl up in herself, keeping her limbs as close to her chest as she can on her graceless, agonizing way down. 

____

Andy’s body crashes against the walkway, rolling a handful of times before being able to stop. 

____

Quynh’s body is stopped dead on its tracks by the office wall-to-wall window across the foot of the stairs. She bounces back, and then lies on her side until one of the guards shoves her body with his foot. She falls on her back, mind drifting to Andy, all the while trying to keep the discomfort, adrenaline and pain at bay.

____

The butt of the submachine gun knocks her out as she makes a move to stand.

____

Andy rushes throught the walkway to the nearest source of cover, a conference room drifting in the middle of the atrium, connected to the building through a small bridge. She breaks the glass, clumsily vaulting over the table in the middle. She stays crouched, deeply aware that she only has a handful of seconds left before the guards barge in. 

____

She doesn't need to make a head-count to know what she's going to be forced to do next. 

____

_I’m sorry._

____

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really AM sorry. 
> 
> I'll try to avoid another 2-week chapter update, but college is hellbent on annoying me so... finger's crossed everyone!


	16. Phoenix

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _January 8th, 2020 – 10:30 p.m. (EST)_
> 
> \- Joe, _come on_! You gotta wake up! –
> 
> \- Te juro que si no te callas, te vas a arrepentir de haber nacido, cabrón* – _* I swear if you don’t shut up, you’ll regret ever being born, asshole_
> 
> \- Vete a la mierda, imbécil* – _*Fuck you, prick_
> 
> The punch is a sound Joe’s overly familiar with. Having Nico be on the receiving end by a stranger takes priority over the unpleasantness palpitating across his body. 
> 
> He opens his eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back!
> 
> Next chapter will be focusing on my girls! I have NO idea what I'm doing at this point. I have a vaaaaaague idea of where the story might go to next? But yeah. I'm excited and lost. Sooooo lost.
> 
> I'll try to have something baked and out of the oven in 2 weeks. Hope you have a phenomenal month babes! Take care of yourselves, stay awesome and have a phenomenal week!

_January 8th, 2020 – 10:30 p.m. (EST)_

\- Joe, _come on_! You gotta wake up! –

\- Te juro que si no te callas, te vas a arrepentir de haber nacido, cabrón* – _* I swear if you don’t shut up, you’ll regret ever being born, asshole_

\- Vete a la mierda, imbécil* – _*Fuck you, prick_

The punch is a sound Joe’s overly familiar with. Having Nico be on the receiving end by a stranger takes priority over the unpleasantness palpitating across his body. 

He opens his eyes.

The urge to strike the fucker is pulled to a full stop when a gun clicks, pointed dead ahead, mere inches away from the spot right between his eyes. His restrained hands only further annoy and drive him to stay frozen in place. 

The van is speeding across the highway with fearless abandon, occasional bump in the road sending them tumbling around on the backseat. He counts three tangos in the front. He turns his head just enough to add two more to the headcount. 

_This is going to be fun._

He turns his head to Nico, the exhaustion, dirt and dry blood on the side of his face hurting Joe as much as the soreness on his torso, hips, the length of his arm… 

_Let’s just cut to the chase and say pain is **all over the place** right now._

\- Oh, darling… - 

His hand makes a foolish attempt to brush Nico’s cheek, only for the restraints to make themselves evident once again.

\- You’re worried about _me_? – A pained cackle escapes from his lips, soon turning to a hoarse cough - Have you seen your… - 

The guard aiming at Joe smacks the grip of his handgun on Nico’s face. Joe shouts, blood starting to boil as Nico face ends up pressed against the leather-like seat.

The guard’s gun doubles back to Joe’s face, the cruel satisfaction in the man’s deep brows (and surprisingly well-kept teeth) spiraling Joe’s anger to the point of no return.

\- You dare touch him again and I’m going to **shove your…** \- 

\- …yeah, that’s going to leave a mark… - 

\- **…come out of your fucking mouth!** – 

\- No sabes hablar español? Pinche gringo pendejo…* – _* Don’t you know any Spanish? Fucking American idiot…_

Nico lowers his voice as he sits back, shoulder now brushing Joe’s, mumbling something along the lines of _“get ready”_. He turns to the guard, mocking so brutal the temptation to laugh strikes Joe almost as much as the chaos that’s about to be unleashed. 

\- Ja! Lo mismo dijo tú madre anoche, carnal* – _* Ha! That’s what your mom said last night, buddy_

The guard, close to having smoke come out of his ears, points his gun at Nico.

\- Now – 

Nico blinks out of sight, finger snapping sound on Joe’s right ear being near-instantly followed by the sound of Nico's body landing on the back seat, between the two guards still processing what just happened.

He lets the adrenaline flow, focusing all his remaining strength on his left foot as it flies in the direction of the gun-waving guard.

The guard’s hand (the bones in it, specifically) cracks as Joe’s foot collides with it.

The bullet whizzes past his ear with a deafening bang, breaking the glass on one of the windows in the back. The van swerves, guards (and the vast majority of the passengers on board) shouting as inertia pulls their bodies to the side. 

Joe listens to the handcuffs Nico left behind rustling across the seat he’s struggling to stay upright in. 

Once he regains enough balance, he lets his other foot join in on the kicking game, using one of the guard’s legs as a counterweight.

The guard’s face crashes against and breaks the window, consciousness slipping away from the man. He lands on the van’s floor while Nico makes sure work of the remaining guard in the back. 

Joe’s breaks the restraints, cuffs clinging to his wrist as he makes a move for the guard on the passenger seat. After catching the guard's incoming punch mid-air, his own fist clashes with the man's jaw, knocking his lights out.

The driver points his gun at Joe.

There's a snapping finger sound in the background. Nico’s hand darts between the two, pulling the weapon upwards, to the sunroof.

The gun fires, almost missing Joe’s head.

Almost.

° ° °

_Winter of ‘97_

He can’t keep his eyes away of Peter. More specifically, the way he limps, as he carefully walks through the snow-covered parking lot.

He licks his lips once. Then twice. He stands. 

Then, he sits back down. 

_You can do this._

_How could I have been such a fucking asshole…_

_He probably won’t want to even look at me after what happened… ___

__

___In... and out._ _ _

____

He stands back up, determined. 

____

_It’s the right thing to do._

____

His hands sink into his pocket as he gets within range, musting up the courage to speak up now that he is within earshot.

____

_Fuck my life._

____

\- Hey, uh… - He coughs, in an effort to clear his strained voice – Pete? – 

____

He sees Pete’s shoulders tense up, guilt stabbing Joe in the back like a poker straight out of the fireplace. 

____

\- Can we talk? – 

____

Pete doesn’t stop walking. His posture is rigid, gaze straight forward. His demeanor is so uncharacteristically cold he momentarily wonders if he shouldn’t just take the hint and turn back, while he still has the chance.

____

\- That is a good question Joe. And the answer is still no – 

____

\- Pete, I just want to… - 

____

\- In fact. I’d appreciate if you just left me the fuck alone from here on out – 

____

He stops dead on his tracks, once it hits just how detached and firm Pete’s voice sounds.

____

_Keep pushing._

____

\- I _definitely_ understand where you’re coming from, but please, Pete. I just want to explain… - 

____

Pete turns, steely glare now dead set on him. Challenging. Hermetic. 

____

It’s not the tone that makes him breathe sharply. 

____

It’s the bruises. 

____

His eyes, unfailingly kind, are begging for an excuse to snap at him even harder than he just did. 

____

_What the hell did they do to you?_

____

A tiny voice in the back of his head bites back venomously.

____

_**Exactly** what you knew they would do if you bailed on him._

____

\- Cat got your tongue? – 

____

\- Pete... – 

____

\- What? – He nods his head forward and to the side for Joe to see, purple marks across the side of his face now front and center – Oh, is it _this_? I can show you the number they did on my ribs. And my stomach. If you think this is unpleasant to see, you just wait... – 

____

He makes a move to lift his shirt, wincing at the sudden movement. He settles for having his nostrils flare and crossing his arms over his chest.

____

\- You’re here to apologize – 

____

\- I am – 

____

\- Well, go on then. Let’s just get this over with – 

____

\- Pete, I… - 

____

\- Apology accepted. Now kindly fuck off – 

____

\- You didn't even give me a chance… - 

____

\- To what? To invite your friends over? _To beat the **shit** out of me again?_ – 

____

\- I never meant for this to happen – 

____

\- Well, maybe you should have put a stop to it when I told you to – 

____

\- I didn’t listen. And I’m sorry, Pete. You have no idea just how much I… -

____

\- No, Joe. I don’t. In fact, I don’t give a **shit** just how much you meant or cared or gave a shit for things to happen. They did – 

____

The silence in the park is deafening. He’s perfectly aware of the birds fluttering around, the dry leaves and snow piling up around their feet now that they’ve stopped moving. 

____

But right now? He might as well be in a vacuum. In space. 

____

Suffocating.

____

Alone.

____

_Just as alone as he felt when you rushed out of that locker room._

____

_It’s less than you deserve._

____

\- Joe… there’s nothing you can say that’s going to make me change my mind – 

____

\- You deserve so much better – 

____

\- Yeah. Shame it took a bunch of bigoted jocks beating the living shit out of me to notice, huh? – 

____

\- I never should have left you there by yourself – 

____

\- No. You shouldn’t – 

____

His face has softened over the course of their discussion. A sense of finality permeates every sentence on Pete’s side of the conversation. Indifference in its most vile and raw expression.

____

\- Which is why I’m not going to give you the chance to do it again – When Pete sniffs, his red eyes give away that it is as much the cold to blame as the turmoil wreaking havoc inside him – Not for a long fucking time – 

____

He feels the tears well up in his eyes. He keeps his eyes level to Pete’s, somehow. 

____

They’re no longer angry. At least not as much. He is hurt. 

____

It kills him to see Pete like this. But he can’t bring himself to look away. It doesn’t feel fair to shield himself from the pain he inflicted, now coming and eating him alive, there and then.

____

_Will you ever find it in your heart to forgive me for this?_

____

\- I understand – 

____

\- So… anything else you want to put out there? – He seems torn between walking away and giving Joe one last chance to redeem himself before they part ways – Because if not, I’m outta here – 

____

\- I just wanted you to know that… - _Breathe, damn it. In… and out_ – I never meant for you to get hurt the way you did. And… if I could somehow turn back time to… - _Stop. Just… stop_ – Nobody deserves to be treated like that – _You only ever treated me with kindness. And I stabbed you in the back like a coward_ – Least of all someone as sweet as you – He lets the tear roll down his cheek, unable to keep eye contact any longer – I hope that you find someone who treats you… with the same kindness that you gave me – 

____

_With the same kindness that I failed to give back._

____

Pete hugs his arms impossibly tighter, resisting the impulse to give in and kiss Joe’s tears away. 

____

_Oh, Joe._

____

\- As far as apologies go… - He clears his voice – that one wasn’t… - He wipes the snot coming out of his nose with the backside of his sleeve – you know, terrible –

____

\- I really am sorry, Pete. I… - 

____

\- Stop – 

____

He does.

____

\- I don’t… I don’t feel ready to forgive you – 

____

The words force the air out of his lungs the same way an uppercut straight to the stomach would. 

____

For a moment, he forgets how to breath. 

____

_Can you blame him?_

____

\- I… I understand if you don’t – 

____

_But I would like to try._

____

Peter keeps that thought to himself.

____

Joe looks up to Peter. 

____

Pete’s resolve falters, lip quivering for a split second before he bites still.

____

\- I’m going to need some time - 

____

Joe nods, unable to think of anything else to add, besides what has already been said. There’s nothing left to say here.

____

\- You know how to contact me …when you feel the time is right – 

____

They stare, comfortable silence no longer a card to be dealt in the set of cards of their relationship. 

____

Peter nods. Joe walks back, each step aching more than the previous one. 

____

_It’s not ideal. But it is a start._

____

He turns back, resignation burying his hope down in the snow at his feet.

____

\- You know…? –

____

He turns back towards Pete, arms pressed to his sides in an effort to keep warm. 

____

And not fall apart on the spot.

____

\- I know you’re not an asshole, Joe. But sometimes you seem so fucking desperate to prove otherwise – 

____

Joe wipes his nose, noticing the underlying kindness, concealed in Pete’s firm statement. 

____

_You’re a good person, Joe. You just forget it sometimes._

____

\- I’m working on it – 

____

\- Well. Good luck with that – 

____

____

° ° °

____

____

_January 9thth, 2020 – Panama – 1:04 a.m. (EST)_

____

\- Ugh, **my head** – 

____

The van screeches to a halt, body rushing forward and being stopped by the seatbelt, the squeal of the tires making him lose what little composure he’s got left. He curses out in pain as the van stops.

____

He keeps his eyes shut tight, wincing at the migraine and the suddenness with which they stopped travelling through the highway.

____

Nico’s hands rub circles in his chest, voice gentle, touch doing marvels to ease the overwhelming hand he’s been dealt with.

____

_I’m so fucking nauseous right now._

____

Nico seems to be feeling the exact same way, as it turns out.

____

He rushes out of the car, retching over the pavement as a handful of cars speed past them. 

____

He struggles to unfasten his seatbelt, only to realize that he doesn’t possess the energy to walk out and around the car to comfort Nico. The broken handcuffs are still dangling from his wrists. He settles for speaking up, wondering just how pathetic and exhausted he looks.

____

\- Darling? – 

____

\- Do you ever just… - Nico places his hand on the roof of the car, taking a deep breath, before cautiously settling back down in the driver seat - …feel like the world is spinning and screaming at the top of its lungs just to spite you? – 

____

\- Like it’s pushing its luck? And you just want to punch a wall? Scream until your voice grows hoarse? – 

____

\- So, you **do** know. What are the odds? – 

____

\- To my experience, slim – 

____

Nico’s hands land on the steering wheel, motivation to keep driving as laughably fictitious as it gets.

____

\- I don’t want to do this anymore – 

____

The heaviness in Nico’s voice make the night air feel a thousand degrees lower.

____

\- I can’t say I blame you – 

____

Nico’s fingers twist the keys, the roar of the motor growing silent after a rickety struggle.

____

\- Penny for your thoughts? – 

____

\- Oh, you’re going to need more than a penny. My internal monologue is putting up quite the show up here – He taps at his temple. 

____

He lets his hands land on his thighs before he changes his mind, hands now reaching up to pull at his hair, his mind as troubled as Joe’s.

____

Before Joe can speak up, Nico breaks the silence.

____

\- How do you… - He sighs – You never really get over it, do you? – 

____

The unpleasantness in the pit of his stomach makes him consider the possibility of crawling out of the car and vomiting on the side of the van, mirroring the way Nico did minutes ago.

____

\- First time I… - _killed someone_ – …did it, it was out of self-defense – He was 25 at the time. He still has nightmares about it to this day. It’s been 10 years – Couldn’t look at myself in the mirror for a long time after that – 

____

\- How many have…? – 

____

Nico lets Joe fill in the blanks.

____

\- Let’s just say there’s a reason I’m not overly fond of sleeping –

____

_Several, actually._

____

\- Are you… you sure you want to keep talking about this? – 

____

There’s something in Nico’s voice that gives away how _not_ discussing this is even less appealing than doing it.

____

It takes him a moment to put his thoughts in order. 

____

Speaking this particular conflict into existence isn’t exactly a warm, cozy enterprise. 

____

But if he can help Nico tackle this more gracefully than he did… it sounds like a risk worth taking. Hellish. But worth it.

____

_If not, well. I can at least suck the poison out of the wound._

____

_In… and out._

____

\- Will it give you some peace of mind if I do? – 

____

\- I’m kind of getting the feeling we’d both benefit from it – 

____

\- That’s… true. But also easier said than done –

____

\- How… - Nico bites his lip before making up his mind to go for a more slow-burn approach - Did you ever talk about this stuff with Andy? –

____

He communicates his understanding with a barely-there smile.

____

\- I was… stubborn at first. But she’s always had a no-nonsense, cut-the-crap attitude when it comes to this stuff – 

____

\- She actually managed to convince you? – 

____

\- She’s as stubborn as I am, so... – Nico huffs. The air remains tense, but he’s more inclined to keep going now, at least - I’m grateful she stepped in when she did – 

____

\- How did you cope? – 

____

\- I’ve tried many things over the years. Booze. Sex. I… - 

____

He sighs, shame strong enough to make him close his eyes, fingers digging into the palm of his hand until Nico’s touch calms his nerves. He hesitates, but gives in ultimately, intertwining his fingers with Nico’s. 

____

It helps.

____

\- I get it – 

____

Joe chuckles dryly.

____

\- I thought I did too. For a long fucking time. It was nice to feel in control, while also… not? Looking back on it I.. I definitely could have handled it better. In a more... - _Intelligent_ \- ...constructive way, I suppose – 

____

\- When you’re hurting… it never really feels like you have a choice in the matter. You just… you don’t think about the “healthy way” of going about it. You just act. Even if it … - 

____

\- It hurts – 

____

The way Nico’s grip tightens on his hand pulls at his heartstrings. The restraint on his face only drives the point further home. 

____

\- And what do you with it? - 

____

_The hurting?_

____

\- You spit it out, darling – 

____

He sees Nico, the knot in his throat painfully clear. 

____

\- What are you saying? – 

____

\- I want you to just… scream it out into the world – 

____

\- I don’t think that’s… - 

____

\- It is – 

____

\- Joe, I just... – 

____

\- You _need_ to let it out – 

____

\- I don’t want to let out _anything_ – 

____

\- I’m getting the feeling that you do – 

____

Nico’s eyes grow frustrated.

____

\- _What are you doing? _–__

______ _ _

\- I’m trying to help you – 

______ _ _

\- You’re _annoying_ me, that’s what you’re… – 

______ _ _

\- _Just say it_ – 

______ _ _

Nico fights back the tears, only driving Joe to try harder.

______ _ _

\- **Joe**. Whatever game you’re… - 

______ _ _

\- I’m not going to stop until you do – 

______ _ _

\- _Stop it_ \- 

______ _ _

\- Nico – 

______ _ _

\- **What?!** – 

______ _ _

\- You need to let it out! – 

______ _ _

\- _I don’t want to let it out!_ -

______ _ _

\- _Why not?!_ – 

______ _ _

Nico’s face twists with anger.

______ _ _

\- **Because it fucking hurts, okay?!** – 

______ _ _

Joe dismisses the mocking, the sarcasm and the rage. 

______ _ _

He knows it’s not truly directed at him.

______ _ _

Nico needs to do this, every bit as much as he needs to witness it. 

______ _ _

\- **I…** \- 

______ _ _

Joe reciprocates Nico’s grip, tightness growing it strength to the point where it feels like a bomb.

______ _ _

It’s going off. 

______ _ _

Joe wants it too. 

______ _ _

Nico needs it too.

______ _ _

He braces for impact, emotions welling up inside him as Nico’s composure starts to come undone.

______ _ _

Nico’s scream pierces into the night, shrill, aching and free. 

______ _ _

His own scream follows shortly after.

______ _ _

It’s a deafening disaster, a long time in-the-making. 

______ _ _

A heartbreaking concert that prolongs itself for a seeming eternity, untethered by any logic or civility.

______ _ _

It’s agony. Tears. Fury.

______ _ _

Bottled up inside for years, finally bursting out like a forest fire, ravaging and cathartic.

______ _ _

It burns.

______ _ _

It hurts.

______ _ _

And it’s exactly what they both needed.

______ _ _

______ _ _

° ° °

______ _ _

______ _ _

_8:40 a.m. (EST)_

______ _ _

\- Sleep well? – 

______ _ _

Joe chuckles, still wrapping his head at what the answer to the question is. 

______ _ _

\- Better than I had any right to – 

______ _ _

Nico leans on the opposite side of the window frame with the blanket hanging over his shoulders, bare chest taking a peek through the "V". 

______ _ _

His hair is messy enough to warrant a small laugh out of Joe. His hands give in to the temptation, reaching up to it with no resistance from Nico. Nico’s blush encourages him to go all in and mess with it until Nico brushes his hand away, amiably.

______ _ _

_There. Nicely tousled._

______ _ _

\- You sound… conflicted about it –

______ _ _

_I am._

______ _ _

\- I’d gotten used to not sleeping, and then, just like that – He snaps his fingers – you suddenly… can? – 

______ _ _

\- Might have something to do with the company – 

______ _ _

He catches Nico’s smirk out of the corner of his eye, his emeralds fixated on the quietude of the city, slowly coming back to life.

______ _ _

\- Nah. My money’s on being closer to the Equator. Earth's gravity. Magnetism. Something along those lines – 

______ _ _

Nico slaps his shoulder with the blanket.

______ _ _

\- Shut up - 

______ _ _

They both breathe deeply, coffee machine brewing, sun rising up to catch up to the Panamanian day-to-day hecticness.

______ _ _

Joe’s eyes are overflowing with fondness, Nico’s own eyes effortlessly replicating the sentiment, once he turns to Joe. 

______ _ _

\- Ever since we patched things up I, uh… - He doubles back, sleep still pulling at the corners of his mind – I’d forgotten what it was like to feel so safe – 

______ _ _

Nico bites his lip, struggling to keep the levity out of his reply. It feels unnecessary all the sudden. 

______ _ _

\- I… I’m glad I… - He coughs, visibly taken by surprise by Joe’s sincerity – You’re it for me, Joe – 

______ _ _

Nico looks out the window as his mind starts revving up its engines, resolute to stay grounded in the moment, rather than the chaotic night they experienced.

______ _ _

Joe moves in closer as soon as he notices the shiver running across Nico’s body, despite the warm breeze sneaking into the room through the balcony.

______ _ _

Nico’s eyes remain fixated on the street below, troubled mind wandering down a darker road.

______ _ _

Joe’s hands are affectionate, his sad smile full of understanding. He positions himself on Nico’s side, his lover meeting him halfway. Their chests are near flush against one another, a thin blanket the only barrier separating their skin. 

______ _ _

The lazy morning sun casts a soft, cozy glow over their silhouette. Joe rocks their bodies back and forth, an affectionate lullaby that eases the burden on Nico’s heart.

______ _ _

\- I wouldn’t mind staying here for a while – 

______ _ _

They’re both fully aware that they need to check in with Andy and Quynh sooner, rather than later.

______ _ _

Joe presses his body closer to Nico’s, deep breaths soon in sync.

______ _ _

Nico’s trembling body is gradually brought back to peace; the wetness in his eyes, gently cleansed by Joe’s lips. A butterfly touch, fluttering across Nico’s cheeks with heavenly care.

______ _ _

______ _ _

Nico’s smile is soft and grateful, scars now well on their way to healing.

______ _ _

\- I’ve got you, darling – 

______ _ _

Nico exhales.

______ _ _

_We’ll be alright._

______ _ _


	17. What I Held on to for Dear Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _The streets of merry-old London – January 9th, 2020 – 2:20 a.m. (GMT)_
> 
> \- Was getting caught part of your plan? – 
> 
> Andy turns her head to Quynh, torn between the amusement, the brief annoyance caused by her comment, and the displeasure of seeing Quynh so beaten up and defeated, still trying to crack a grin out of her.
> 
> \- The handcuffs are a kinky addition – 
> 
> The guard in the driver’s seat thick accent (lovely, in a different context) barks back at the pair. 
> 
> \- Shut it – 
> 
> Andy and Quynh deadpan towards the front of the car, simultaneously. Quynh voices out their shared train of thought.
> 
> \- Bite me – 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh. Hi.
> 
> Been a while. Life's been pretty crazy, sorry for not giving y'all a heads up! 
> 
> This semester's shaping up to be rather crazy, so this next chapter MIGHT be the last one. I want to give this story some closure, and also start working on a new project I've been postponing for a while. 
> 
> Sorry again for the long-ass delay, hope y'all are doing alright! Take care of yourselves, and I sincerely hope '21 is nice to you.

_The streets of merry-old London – January 9th, 2020 – 2:20 a.m. (GMT)_

\- Was getting caught part of your plan? – 

Andy turns her head to Quynh, torn between the amusement, the brief annoyance caused by her comment, and the displeasure of seeing Quynh so beaten up and defeated, still trying to crack a grin out of her.

\- The handcuffs are a kinky addition – 

The guard in the driver’s seat thick accent (lovely, in a different context) barks back at the pair. 

\- Shut it – 

Andy and Quynh deadpan towards the front of the car, simultaneously. Quynh voices out their shared train of thought.

\- Bite me – 

The guard on the passenger side ( _Oh, come on. She’s kinda cute, babe_ ) laughs under her breath. The driver’s snark is then directed at her instead.

\- Would you mind shutting up those two? – 

\- What is with you today? – 

\- I’m not asking nicely again –

After a tense visual standoff, the cute guard breathes deeply and moves out of her seat. Andy makes a face. Quynh rolls her eyes in disgust. 

\- Prick – 

The driver raises his voice, in a way that makes Andy’s face to turn sour and her nails to dig into the palms of her hands. 

\- You got something to say to me? – 

Quynh keeps her cool, thigh pressing against Andy’s in a vain effort to calm her.

\- Don’t know about her, but I’ve got a bone to pick with you, _laddie_ –

Andy keeps her laughter at bay through pursed lips. The cute guard isn’t as efficient. The asshole driver’s ears and cheeks turn red at the fake accent.

\- Will you **SHUT IT?!** – 

Andy looks up at the cute guard raising her eyebrow, their shared anger softening the guards features and further helping Andy keep her cool.

\- Testy, aren't you love? - 

The cute guard's eyes turn wide, fully expecting the bomb behind her to blow. 

The driver curses under his breath instead, knucles turning white on the steering wheel. 

Quynh winks at the cute guard hunching in front of her before she turns invisible.

Cute guard freezes in place. Andy brings a finger up to her mouth, freshly escaped handcuffs left to rest on the seat. While Andy gets to work on Quynh’s restraints, the guard in front of the pair gives in to the shock and speaks her confusion into existence. 

\- What in the… - 

\- They don’t pay you to loaf, lass. Shake a leg! – 

The cute guard’s features turn murderous, her posture stiffening and patience all but extinct.

\- Oh, I have **had it…!** -

The driver’s face is punched (kicked?) by Quynh, with enough strength for it to smack against the car window. The glass cracks, threatening to break at any further pressure.

As Quynh climbs on top of the unconscious man to take the wheel, the car swerves dangerously close to the cars parked on the side of the street. 

_Whose **brilliant** idea was it to put the wheel on **this** fucking side?_

Once they’re in the clear, Quynh slows down, halting at the stoplight.

A tense, agonizing handful of seconds pass by, until the cute guard raises her voice.

\- Is he alive? – 

Quynh snorts. 

\- He’ll have a hell of a headache later, but he’ll be alright – 

Andy chimes in, not entirely sure she’s thrilled at the prospect of leaving the cute guard with the asshole Quynh’s sitting on. 

\- Is he always this charming? – 

\- Not usually. But let’s just say I’m sorry **I** wasn’t the one who punched his lights out – 

Quynh’s voice carries an edge when she speaks up again.

\- You seem… strangely calm, with the whole invisibility bit – 

\- My sister. She, uh… she packs a punch an awful lot like the one you’re parading around – 

\- What’s her deal? –

\- Quynh –

Quynh rolls her eyes at Andy. 

\- Oh, like you aren’t curious –

The cute guard’s grin fades.

\- What’s next? – 

\- What’s next for… oh. Right – 

Quynh turns back, face straight, but tone reassuring.

\- You and Mr. Asshole down here should probably off on the next red light – 

The cute guard grins at Andy.

\- Bossy – 

Andy turns to the guard as she jumps into the front seat, hand caressing Quynh’s shoulder halfway through.

\- You have _no_ idea – 

The guard blushes, further relaxing down on the back seat.

Quynh eyes the rearview mirror, still surprised the cops parked across the street missed their acrobatics. Andy turns her head back towards the guard.

\- You sure you’ll be alright? – 

\- I’ll… - She sighs – I’ll just hail this one a cab and head home. Filled my quota for excitement for what’s left of the week -

Andy snorts.

They remain silent until they reach a comfortingly empty and silent street.

\- He won’t give you a hard time, will he? – 

\- Won’t go well for him if he tries – 

Quynh’s smile is complicit.

\- Finger’s crossed – 

The guard’s smile is equal parts somber and thankful.

Once the pair of guards are outside, Andy rolls down the window on the passenger side, double-checking before driving off. 

\- We can stick around for a little while longer if you want –

Quynh leans forward on the driver seat.

\- We don’t mind, love –

\- You’ve done enough, really. Besides, you look like you need some shut-eye every bit as much as I do – 

As if on cue, the asshole guard, back pressed against a fire hydrant, groans.

\- You stay safe, alright? – 

The cute guard huffs. 

\- Same goes for you two – 

She watches Andy and Quynh turn the corner, mind still reeling and heartbeat slowly regaining its composure. Sean touches the side of his face, flinching at the bruise starting to form on the side of his face.

\- Fucking hell – 

\- Language – 

The man slowly stands on his feet, bruised face sending a guilty sense of satisfaction out of the red-haired standing next to him, pressing send on her cellphone.

\- _Where the hell is the car?!_ – 

\- Yeah…don’t think we’ll see that tin can ever again – 

\- Fuck. They’re going to chew our asses tomorrow – 

\- Later, actually. And most likely yours. _You_ were the one driving – 

\- Yeah, well, you were the one supposed to… - 

The red-haired guard gives him a cold, menacing stare through the bags under her eyes and eyelashes. 

He breathes, knowing better than to push her buttons further than he already has. 

\- I'm sorry - 

\- How big of you – 

\- I mean it – 

She gives the man’s answer some room to breathe.

\- Going to have to be more specific than that – 

The man curses under his breath.

\- I was a rude fucking prick, alright? – 

\- Was? – 

\- I… am. And it’s not your fault. I never should have raised my voice to you like that. André's been acting so odd lately, and I don't know what to... - He sighs - I realize that's not an excuse. I was stupid. And it won't happen again – 

\- You were. But it’s nice to hear you say it – 

\- Real lovely – 

\- As usual –

They stay silent as the cab rolls around. 

The male guard opens the door for her. She steps in, stoic.

He then closes the door behind her. 

She rolls down the window as she settles on the seat and sees the determination on his face. 

\- You do realize we’re neighbors, right? – 

\- I need to clear my head. And do a walk of shame while I’m at it – 

\- I’ll see you tomorrow then – 

\- I _am_ sorry, Em – 

\- I know. Just… I’ll catch you later – 

The cab drives off. 

The man stays put.

_Hey, at least it’s not pouring rain._

The clouds roar in response, cold drizzle creeping under his clothes with surprising speed.

_Serves me right._

° ° °

4:20 a.m. (GMT)

\- I still think we should’ve waited a little bit –

Andy taps at Quynh’s open wound, concealed under her silk-like hair, itself curled over her head and resting on the shoulder opposite to the injury.

\- She can take care of herself –

\- What makes you so sure? – 

\- She had that look on her face – 

\- Which one? – 

\- The same one you have when you’re about to obliterate someone’s face with your fist. Or at the very least their dignity – 

\- Harr harr – 

\- You nearly fell unconscious driving because of the blood loss, and you’re more worried about her? –

\- Well, I have you to patch me up. She was… alone – 

Andy concedes, guilt creeping up on her conscience. 

\- Well, she took the cab alone, at least – 

\- I would have jumped out of the car and dragged him out of the cab if he’d dared to hop in – 

\- I wouldn’t have stopped you – 

Andy finishes nursing Quynh, kissing her temple and fingers caressing her lover’s cheek softly.

\- There you go – 

Quynh leans in to the touch, covering Andy’s hand with her own. Andy moves closer to the bed, Quynh opening her legs, basking in the warmth of Andy’s body pressing up against her own.

Andy feels Quynh’s head leaning over her stomach, exhaustion stampeding into the pair like a freight train.

\- I’m so tired, babe – 

The brokenness in Quynh’s voice pushes Andy to the brink, waterworks threatening to burst open at the slightest nudge.

\- I know – 

The silence that follows makes time lose its meaning and flow; the tiredness, deep in their bones, pulling at the heartstrings. They keep both their eyes closed shut throughout.

\- I don't want to do this anymore – 

Andy hums in agreement, unable to say otherwise.

\- I think in our effort to put some good out in the world, we forgot to do the same for ourselves – 

\- The boy are counting on us though – 

There’s not a single trace of resentment in Quynh’s voice. It’s an exhausted acknowledgement of a fact. Sort off.

\- I get the feeling they might be as fed up as we are with this… - _Life? Adventure? A fuck-ton of bullshit is starting to seem like a more appropriate term._

Quynh’s voice regains some of its levity and innate charisma, much to Andy’s relief. 

\- It’s been… _an experience_ – 

Her voice hesitates halfway through, due to a rather surprising wave of amusement. A snort bursts out of her near the end. Andy chuckles and follows suit. The poison and dread that’s been building up for the past handful of weeks is slowly sucked out of her system, as Quynh’s laughter fills the room, easing the weight off from her shoulders.

\- Might have done a _little_ oversteering there at the end – 

Quynh laughs, face still pressed over Andy’s stomach and bellybutton. She gasps as the gush of her catches her by surprise. Quynh roars and rolls with the amusement, wrapping her arms around Andy’s waist in an effort to keep her from escaping her (up until that point, light) grip.

After a playful struggle, their bodies end up lying one on top of the other; Andy’s chest pressed up against Quynh’s, thighs tangled up like a knot, lips and eyes mere inches apart. Their kiss is full of need, catharsis and release being the ultimate goal. 

As their remaining clothes land on the hotel room floor, tears start to slide down Quynh’s cheeks. Andy's lips kiss them away. 

Their shared warmth, and the seemingly never-ending drizzle outside sings them to sleep. 


	18. A Conversation Long Overdue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Haven – 8:30 a.m – January 13th, 2020_
> 
> \- Something on your mind? – 
> 
> He huffs, equal parts pleased and grateful to have Nile by his side.
> 
> \- You know me – 
> 
> \- I do, but I’m no psychic – She leans on the railing, leaving her crutches rest beside her - You want the wisdom? Spill – 
> 
> He can’t bring himself to deny the aforementioned wisdom. Confidence is kind of a given when it comes to Nile. 
> 
> \- I wouldn’t even know where to start – 
> 
> \- Still halfway through my first cup of coffee, Joe. You know better than to test my patience before I’m on the second one –

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hold on to your butts.

_Haven – 8:30 a.m – January 13th, 2020_

\- Something on your mind? – 

He huffs, equal parts pleased and grateful to have Nile by his side.

\- You know me – 

\- I do, but I’m no psychic – She leans on the railing, leaving her crutches rest beside her - You want the wisdom? Spill – 

He can’t bring himself to deny the aforementioned wisdom. Confidence is kind of a given when it comes to Nile. 

\- I wouldn’t even know where to start – 

\- Still halfway through my first cup of coffee, Joe. You know better than to test my patience before I’m on the second one – 

In an effort to try and put his thoughts in order before he indeed _spills_ , he nods down to her legs.

\- How’s the pain? – 

\- Fine. Stall all you want - He chuckles as she sighs and plays along - Legs are… they carried me all the way from my room to here, so I guess I can’t complain that much – 

\- Crutches can’t be as bulky as the wheelchair. That’s a plus, right? – 

\- Oh, they are. Painkillers though? Not a fan. Shit tastes like cardboard. Make me feel kind of groggy. Kind of like a hangover? Except I can’t actually _drink_ anything while I’m on them - 

\- Well, at least you can complain about them just fine –

Her smile is tight as she retorts.

\- I’m two seconds away from pushing you over the railing – 

\- That sounds harsh – 

\- You’ve always been a sucker for punishment –

\- I suppose old habits die hard – 

She shoves him, the playfulness of her voice laced with firmness that leaves no room for arguing. Nile has a way of making her suggestions feel like orders.

_Old habits really **do** die hard, as it turns out._

\- Come on, out with it. What’s on your mind? This little balcony has become your go-to spot for your “looking dramatic and thoughtful” routine – 

He breathes, deciding it’s best to rip the band-aid off without the preamble stretching on for too long.

\- How do you even know it when you love someone? –

He speaks up in a way that makes the question seem more directed at the universe, rather than exclusively at Nile. With a little bit of luck, maybe the answer will appear written in the sky. It sure as hell would spare him the frustration of trying to make sense out of it by himself. 

Nile muses over the implications of the question, but ultimately decides to answer it best way she can. They can gossip about the specifics later. 

\- I talked with Pete recently, you know? – 

Joe’s jaw clenches. Some scars never really stop healing. 

_On second thought, scratch that. They heal alright: It's the itch they leave behind them that's the problem._

\- How was he? – 

\- He was… ecstatic, actually. He, uh… - Only the does Nile realize that bringing Joe's ex ( _Let's put that "ex" with an asteric_ ) might have been the wrong call – He’s been sober for a solid two years - _Too late now_ \- Adopted several dogs. And hey, he's participating in a fancy… symposium thingy over in the University of Valladolid? Things have been looking up for him recently – 

\- Don’t get me wrong. I’m glad he’s doing great, but… - 

\- I was getting to that. Kinda wish he’d be the one to break the news, but to hell with it. He’s getting married – 

\- And you figured... rubbing that in my face is a sure-fire way to help me determine whether I love Nico or not? – 

\- Do you? – 

He screams internally, feeling the agonizing desperation kicking into gear.

\- How the… - _In… and out_ – How do you even _know_? I mean... **honestly!** Part of the reason things didn’t work out with Pete was because… - 

_Oof. Not sure I should be pulling at that thread._

\- You aren’t seriously still blaming yourself for what happened? – 

\- Wouldn’t you? – 

\- This might actually be simpler than I thought… - Nile clears her throat, her trademark confidence making a triumphant return. Joe’s not sure whether he should he thrilled or terrified at the prospect – Joe, a relationship is a thing of two. Or, you know, three if you’re not crazy about monogamy and everyone’s on the same page… - 

\- Nile – 

\- **Joe**. Pete’s as much to blame as you are for how things played out. I thought you’d have made your peace with it at this point. It’s been, what? 10 years? –

Joe's voice is lower when he answers, his gaze focused downwards.

\- 23 -

\- Shit, really? – 

\- Why would you bring this up now? – 

\- Why hadn’t you?! Joe, love is… - _Oh, do tell_ – It’s not like they paint in the movies –

\- That is the single most clichéd thing I’ve ever heard come out of your mouth – 

\- And it’s hopefully the last one too. But it doesn’t make it any less true – 

\- Care to elaborate? – 

She sighs, determined to make sure the message comes across. Or at the very least, that Joe feels more at peace once they’re done talking. 

\- Pete is as charming as it gets. But he’s also the guy who’s living life at a thousand miles per hour. For some reason. He doesn’t seem to realize that some of us just can’t function at that… speed. Some of us need time. People like you and me have feelings as genuine as his. It just takes us a little while longer to come to grips with them. To… make sure they’re genuine. To trust without hesitation. Shit like that takes time – 

\- I shouldn’t have let him to fend off for himself with those assholes – 

\- No. You shouldn’t. But he shouldn’t have tried to force your hand to come out when you weren’t ready. That you weren’t ready to walk down the hallways holding his hand doesn’t mean you didn’t want to. He never really got that. He’s always been in such a rush to live. I get the feeling that often backfired on him, and he never really understood why –

\- He always felt so… angry. Not in an aggressive kind of way, but… I always got the feeling he was aching for an excuse to start throwing punches - He rolls his eyes when the memories come flashing back - Or start a discussion – 

\- You, on the other hand, prefer to think with your head, rather than your dick – 

\- Charming – 

\- Rather blunt, actually. But also – 

\- True – 

\- As usual – 

\- I don’t want Nico to feel like I don’t care about him – 

\- You seen the way he looks at you? – A smile spreads across Joe’s cheeks. He has, actually - Hell, have you seen the way you look at him? – The blush and heat building up on his face make Joe look away - The way you talk about him, Jesus. I thought your poetry was melodramatic – 

\- Hey, you said you liked it! – 

\- Oh, give me a break! I’ve cried because of that sappy shit you write. That’s as complimentary as I’m ever gonna get with you – 

\- So you _do_ like it –

\- Yes, Joe. I like the cheesy and overtly sentimental poetry that you write –

\- I also write songs – 

\- Don’t push your luck – 

\- Ouch – 

\- Just go talk to him, Joe – 

\- That’s easier said than done – 

Nile’s smile grows, for some reason, the smugness in it making Joe’s heart sink down to the floor. 

\- Man, what are the odds of _you_ showing up? –

Joe’s eyes grow wide when he detects Nico’s presence behind him, only to then become murderous and resentful at Nile for not giving him a proper heads-up. 

\- I get the feeling you were talking about me – 

\- We were talking about Joe being a dumbass, mostly - Joe mutters an insencere "thank you", that sounds an awful lot like a "fuck you" - But you also popped up in the conversation here and there – 

Nico’s arms wrap around Joe’s shoulder’s as he turns around to greet him with a quick kiss.

\- Get a room – 

\- We’ll just finish up here and then head up, won’t we, hon? -

\- Yeah, we, uh… we have some stuff to talk about first – 

\- I’ll say – 

Joe turns to Nile, exasperated.

\- Weren’t you on your way out? – 

\- I’m still not done with my coffee. Don’t see the point in rushing –

Joe snatches the cup from Nile’s hand. He then pours it over the balcony. He hands it back to her with mighty satisfied grin (and the sudden impulse to jump off the railing before Nile takes the initiative to do so herself). 

\- I’ve left men sterile for less – 

\- Good thing we’re friends, right? – 

Nile steps up to the pair, hand reaching up to Joe’s cheek.

Joe’s head inches as far away as possible as Nile’s hand approaches his face while Nico holds back laughter at the "hurt puppy" expression on Joe's face. He flinches when Nile’s hand (softly) lands on its target. She gently slaps him once, twice, and then pulls away, pleased with the way the color drains out from Joe’s face and the way his eye closes, expecting the worst. 

\- We’ll have a little chat later, Joe – 

\- Lucky me – 

\- Not the word I’d use, but hey. _Love_ that glass half-full attitude of yours – 

Joe clears his throat, his life flashing before his eyes, and his time on this Earth seemingly coming to an anticlimactic end in the matter of a few hours. 

Nile then turns to Nico. 

\- Tell me how it goes later – 

Nico salutes, their matching grins leading Joe to suddenly become a believer in conspiracy theories.

\- You got yourself a deal, ma’am – 

\- God you make me feel old – 

\- You’re aging like a fine wine, for what it’s worth – 

\- You flirt - She kisses him on the cheek before whispering back to Joe - He's a keeper – 

Nico snuggles deeper into Joe’s chest, earning a pleased hum from him as a result. Joe then adresses Nile, jokingly resentful. For the most part.

\- Hey, I'm charming in my own way too – 

Nile’s eyes meet Joe’s. 

\- Eh – 

He deadpans her.

\- Goodbye, Nile –

She turns back, crutches thudding thickly over the wooden floorboards as she starts limping her way over to the cafeteria for her second cup of coffee. 

Without turning back, Nile singsongs as she walks away.

\- Have fun – 

Joe lowers his voice, whispering so only Nico can hear.

\- Bite me – 

\- _I heard that_ – 

\- Shit – 

Once Nile is truly out of earshot, Nico speaks up, chuckling softly.

\- Subtlety, hon – 

\- Thanks, darling – 

Nico twists in Joe’s embrace until they’re face to face, chests flush against one another. Nico closes the distance between them, losing himself in Joe’s welcoming lips.

\- You're most welcome – 

After an even lengthier kiss (this time put in motion by Joe), Nico’s eyes focus squarely on Joe’s. 

\- So… you wanted to talk? – 

\- Yeah. Just… a couple things I wanted to run by you – 

\- Good things, I hope –

He doesn’t miss the near invisible hesitation that flashes across Nico’s eyes. 

\- Eh... deep things, I guess you could say – After his talk with Nile, he’s got to admit he’s feeling more up to the task - But, yeah. I just… just want to make sure we’re on the same page – 

\- Oh, boy – 

Joe’s nerves rev up their engines.

\- That’s not helping ease my nerves in the slightest, just so you know – 

\- Hey, you’re the one getting all serious all the sudden. And besides, I’m the one still in the dark. If anything, I should be the one that’s nervous –

\- Are you? – 

\- I am now. So thanks, but I hate it – 

\- Listen, I’m sorry – 

\- Don’t. Let’s just… - He sighs - Let’s take a deep breath and take it from the top – 

It takes Joe a handful of seconds to catch up and realize Nico meant the whole “deep breath” proposal.

Once they do, Nico takes the initiative, despite his concern now being clearly evident.

\- What’s on your mind? – 

_Oof._

° ° °

Quynh throws the last pair of socks at Andy. 

Andy catches them, places them within the neatly organized bag, and sighs once it’s closed and all set to go.

\- So... you sure I can’t convince you to tell me where we’re headed? – 

\- It would defeat the purpose of the surprise. So… no. These lips are sealed –

Quynh’s words are now wrapped in silk and bathed in innuendo, every syllable dripping with seduction. 

\- Anything you’re willing to trade in exchange for the information? – 

The temptation to give up the charade and confess was strong enough already. This just added an obscene amount of pressure she’s not entirely sure she can resist. Her will of iron may be legendary, but Quynh’s cunning and charm have always managed to break down her defenses with shocking ease. 

It’s gotten kind of embarrassing.

\- Oh, that’s just _shameless_ cheating! –

From her sitting position at the edge of the bed, Quynh crosses her legs. Her foot dangles playfully a handful of inches from the floor. She rests her hands behind her back as she leans back on the bed. 

_Achille’s heel, more commonly known as Quynh._

\- _All_ is fair in love and war, babe – 

\- Clearly - 

Andy moves forward until she’s standing at the foot of the bed. She indulges herself and brushes her thighs against Quynh’s. She manages to keep her cool, somehow. 

That, and the irresistible urge to tackle Quynh down to the bed and kiss that cocky smile off of her lips.

– You know, you could at least try to be subtle about it? You making me look bad – 

\- Oh, but you’ve always been a natural at that. Doesn’t seem fair for _moi_ to take all the blame for it – 

Andy leans in closer, delighted to see Quynh’s expression grow expectant and triumphant at her proximity. She bursts Quynh’s bubble by brushing her lips against hers, stepping away before they get carried away.

Determined to truly give Quynh a taste of her own medicine, she adds.

\- You’re going to have to do better than that, babe – 

Quynh’s pleased smile is replaced by a raised eyebrow and a scowl. 

\- There’s a special place in Hell for people like you – 

\- I’ll be sure to save you a nice spot – 

Quynh gently shoves Andy away, not ready to let go of the bruise Andy left on her pride.

\- Harr harr – 

\- Petty –

\- That surprise better be worth it after this – 

\- You started it – 

\- Shut up – 

After a few minutes of silence, Quynh speaks up, her voice curious and gentle.

\- Thanks, babe – 

Andy turns to her, with curiosity that matches Quynh’s.

\- How do you mean? – 

\- As in, overall, I suppose? – She backtracks, shaking her head - No. Not suppose. I’m… you keep… - She breathes deeply, looking for Andy’s eyes and latching on to them. Her anchor – I don’t think I’ll ever be able to thank you enough. For putting everything in the line for me. I’m still getting used to having someone so… selfless by my side. Someone who cares as genuinely as you do – 

\- You’ve given me every reason to be. And them some – 

\- Still. I… I really appreciate it. It’s nice to have someone I feel safe with around – 

\- I’m... - _Shook down to the core_ \- not about to deny we have a pretty solid track record so far – 

Andy kneels in front of Quynh, both their hands caressing and pulling the other one closer.

It’s a magical, fleeting, and blissful little eternity that both hang on to for dear life.

\- I don’t know how on Earth I managed to get so lucky with you… but I’m fucking glad I did – 

Quynh’s eyes turn glossy. Andy’s smile is as captivating as the Moon itself.

\- How you managed to say that without it being cringeworthy is beyond me – 

Andy deadpans, but her voice remains firm, full of emotion, and more mesmerizing than it has any right to be.

\- Shut up and kiss me already – 

° ° °

\- What about everything prior to it? – 

\- As in… - 

\- As in handjobs, rimjobs and all the jobs that don’t involve the literal act of sex – 

Joe laughs at the bluntness of Nico’s statement. He’s silently grateful that _he_ was the one that spelled it out. He may not be shy in the bedroom, but he’s still getting used to talking about it as openly as they are now. 

\- Oh, I’m _definitely_ on board for with all of that – 

Nico raises an eyebrow seductively, memories flashing past for both like a movie. 

_An rated R movie, without a doubt_

\- You've made that abudantly clear, hon – 

Once the amusement dies down, Joe nods at Nico, questioning.

\- I’m assuming that you’re on board to, given your enthusiasm the past couple of times? –

Nico snorts, cheeks turning red. He throws a grape at his face. He catches it with his mouth, a dorky smile playing on his lips as he breaks and squeezes the juice out of it.

\- Have you seen you? – Joe blushes, earning a satisfied grin out of Nico – I’m comfortable with whatever you’re comfortable doing – He pauses, deciding to put it out in the open – And listen, if you ever feel like trying, I don’t mind being on the receiving end – 

Joe’s eyes turn wide, mildly confused.

\- As in… - 

Nico decides to give Joe a chance to get creative and figure out what he means.

\- As in…? – 

Joe looks away, flustered, but undeniably intrigued at the prospect. 

\- Bottom… ing? – 

\- I really don’t mind – 

\- Doesn’t seem fair though – 

Nico shrugs.

\- It does to me – 

\- You sure? – 

\- Hon, I’m more than thrilled to keep things “light” from here on out, but trust me when I say that getting railed by you – Joe spits out his coffee. Fowler barks at Joe with resentment, and leaves, presumably to search for Andy – sounds _mighty_ appealing –

Joe covers his face while he laughs. He _definitely_ heard the emphasis on the word **mighty** (as well as the accompanying wink).

Once the coughing fit is a thing of the past, Joe only manages to get one word out.

\- _Jesus_ – 

\- You sure you’re ok? I can understand this being kind of awkward – 

\- To be fair, I’m the one who brought it up – 

\- Still. It’s perfectly valid to take things slow and pick up the conversation later. No rush, no grudge – 

\- You’re… - He looks at Nico with fondness, hoping his eyes convey the burst of affection he’s suddenly feeling - your patience truly is astonishing – 

\- You’ve given me every reason to be – 

\- Awww – 

\- Besides, I’ve heard holding grudges is bad for your health. I’d rather not risk it – 

They share a laugh, unable to keep their eyes off from one another, and the distance between them further closing.

\- Might as well – 

Nico raises his cup of coffee in response. Joe raises his own, the clink putting the sex talk on hold for the meantime. 

\- And hey, I was wondering… – 

\- I don’t do BDSM – 

\- … were you under the impression I was? – 

\- Never hurts to ask – 

They remain silent before Joe realizes he might as well clear the air in that regard.

\- I’m not opposed to you taking command – Nico raises his eyebrow. Joe rolls his eyes – and… I guess blindfolds might be… kinda fun? –

\- Oh? - 

Joe raises his voice as his cheeks grow red yet again.

\- Stop laughing! – 

Nico seems at a loss for words, equal parts amused and confused.

\- You’re the one laughing?! – 

\- God, this is awkward! – 

\- Good awkward? -

\- When is awkwardness good? –

\- Well, _this_ feels like a good example - Joe rubs his cheeks, but the air remains light, despite blushing seemingly being an unspoken rule to take part in the conversation - Relax, hon. I’m just messing with you – 

\- It really shouldn’t surprise me at this point – 

\- And yet, it does – 

\- Shut up – 

\- Ok, fine. Bossy and blindfolds are on the table. We can look into the details later on – 

\- Sounds fair – 

Nico takes a sip from his cup before setting it back down on the table.

\- What were you trying to say before? – 

Joe turns his head to the side, struggling to recall where he was planning to drive the conversation towards.

\- Oh! Are we… you know, exclusive? – 

\- Oh. You know, I hadn’t thought of that? I just assumed we were –

\- I mean, given that sex isn’t something I’m on board with… I guess I… - 

_I would mind. But if he’s cool with it, I suppose I could try and…_

\- Joe – 

\- Huh? – 

\- Would _you_ be ok with that? An open relationship? –

\- Still not sure what it would entail, to be honest – 

\- Well, to my experience, it’s a rather casual kind of relationship – He hesitates - Or not casual. I guess more… flexible? If we had a relationship like that, we’d be cool with us seeing other people, given that right from the get-go we’d have established the ground rules. It's a bit of an oversimplification, but that’d be the gist of it – 

\- Have you ever been in one? – 

\- I've been in a polyamorous one, way back in college. Can’t say that I was a fan of it – 

\- How come? – 

\- Well, don’t get me wrong, they were both awesome. Really honest. Direct. I tried _a lot_ of things back then – He sets his eyes in the horizon, allowing the sound of waves and the warm saline breeze to help him further lose himself in the past - It was fun for a while. We spent a lot of time together, and I won’t deny it was pleasant to have that kind of liberty. Felt like there was so much more… love to go around, you know? Like we were in our own little love capsule. It was like the affection was simply never-ending. I kept in touch with them after I stepped back. Theytied the know a couple of years ago – 

\- Why did you step aside? – 

\- Wasn’t something I could see myself in for the long run. It was nice, without a doubt. But it still felt a little weird there in the end – 

\- Why? – 

\- I guess… I’m just not wired that way? I still look back on it and fail to pinpoint a specific reason why. Maybe it was simply that. I prefer a good-old-fashioned romance. It isn’t by any means simpler than an open relationship, or a polyamorous one, but it’s what I feel comfortable with – 

\- Wow – 

\- Yeah – 

\- I’d rather keep things exclusive. You know, just the two of us –

\- Me too – 

\- Cool – 

As minutes pass, the air remains comfortably warm. Their knees brush, hands and fingers in a playful quarrel to demonstrate who's boss in their small-scale affection battle.

Nico breaks the silence when Joe's hand manages to overpower his own.

\- Why did you bring it up though? Curiosity? – 

\- I think it was the sex thing for the most part – 

\- I thought that might be it – He sets his arms on the table, leaning towards Joe and giving him his full attention - I like where we’re at, hon. And I’m crazy about you. And I want to keep getting to know you and see where this goes – 

\- Do you see a future with us? – 

\- We talking "tomorrow's lunch" kind of future? Or is this a "5 years from now" kind of prediction? – 

\- I mean, as in… you know, kids? Marriage? – 

\- Well… I haven’t thought that far ahead. If there’s one thing I learned, is that life doesn’t really care about making plans for the long run – 

\- That sounds... pessimistic? – 

\- Neh, don't take it the wrong way. I guess I’m one of those “live in the moment” kind of people. In our line of work I think it’s inevitable to grow a little skeptic at the concept of “future” – 

\- Oh - He huffs - Ok, I can definitely see where you’re coming from – 

\- Have you though? – Joe meets Nico’s kind emerald eyes. He loves losing himself in them – Thought about kids? Getting hitched with me? – 

\- I have. Still ways off, but I definitely see… I would love nothing more than to keep building something with you. For as long as we can – 

Nico’s eyes avert his own, but they soon find themselves focused back on his own. 

He is hilariously, and hopelessly, unable to escape the pull of Joe’s black, deep, and beautiful set of eyes.

\- You really are a hopeless romantic, huh? – 

\- I thought that’s what you loved about me? – 

Nico slides closer to Joe. 

\- It is – One of his hand’s lands on Joe’s neck, the other in chest - Amongst other things – 

One of Joe’s hands lands on the one Nico has resting somewhere over his heart, their bodies inching closer and closer until their warmth and eagerness fills the air around them with electricity.

\- Do tell – 

Nico’s lips brush against Joe’s cheek, tender and delicate, struggling to keep things slow. 

\- I’d rather show – 

Their eyes, smiles and their blushing cheeks start swimming in a feedback loop of blissful unawareness, unfazed by the passage of time, and uncaring of what might be waiting once they venture deeper into the rabbit hole. 

As their lips collide, the ecstasy blossoming in their chests resonates across every cell, synapse and muscle of their bodies, shielding them from the outside world, and stretching the moment for what feels like an eternity. 

It’s unapologetically romantic, and neither Joe or Nico can bring themselves to stop it, once it has begun.

For as long as it lasts, it’s worth it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm exhausted. But I am glad that I got around to giving this story a semblance of closure. I have a lot of projects on hold, lots of work at college, and as much as I'd like to keep adding chapters to this story until it snaps, I feel like these 18 chapters will do for now. 
> 
> I have given some thought to make a sequel somewhere down the line, but nothing is certain. Yet. I mean, a handful of months from now you may find I did get around to it!
> 
> I hope all of those who stuck around had a pleasant time reading this. It was certainly a really compelling experience for me, and I learned a lot from it. I feel the ending was somewhat abrupt, but I felt it was the right thing to do at the same time? I feel the pace of the major events and character beats was all over the place, but I love the way this story turned out regardless. It felt chaotic in an awkward and extremely fun way. And a handful of people got around to checking this bad boy out, soooo I'm assuming you digged it a little bit too.
> 
> Thanks again for sticking around! Hope y'all are doing alright. It's been rough, but hey, we've made it this far. Things will look up eventually, whether you believe it or not. They usually do. One way or another. 
> 
> Keep it up. Believe it or not, you're doing Great.


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